I'm new to this community but dealing with a somewhat similar situation. Reading through all these responses has been incredibly educational - I had no idea the financial support requirement was so strict for stepchildren. One thing I wanted to add that might be helpful: when I was dealing with my own SSA issue last year, I learned that you can request what's called a "case summary" which shows all the actions taken on your file. This might help explain the discrepancy between getting representative payee letters but then being told benefits were denied. Also, regarding the MySocialSecurity account still showing "active" - I've noticed their online system can be really slow to update, sometimes lagging weeks or even months behind actual case decisions. So that might not be reliable indicator of your current status. The advice about pooled finances and getting an attorney's statement sounds really solid. I'd also suggest keeping a detailed log of every conversation you have with SSA going forward - date, time, representative name/ID if they give it, and exactly what was said. This documentation could be crucial if you end up needing to appeal or if there are continued discrepancies in your case information. Hope you're able to get this sorted out soon - it's such a stressful situation when you're getting conflicting information from the same agency!

As a newcomer to this community, I've been reading through this thread with great interest since I'm dealing with some SSA challenges myself. What strikes me about your situation is the timeline inconsistency - getting representative payee letters typically means benefits were already approved in the system, so a verbal denial afterward seems like there might be a processing error or miscommunication. I'd strongly recommend following the advice about requesting your complete case file and filing the SSA-561 reconsideration form immediately. Don't wait for an official denial letter since you're working within that 60-day window from whenever the actual denial occurred. One additional thought: since you mentioned you've been the primary caregiver for 8 years and structured your work around the children's needs, you might want to calculate the monetary value of the childcare services you provide. Professional childcare costs can be substantial, and while SSA focuses on financial support, the economic value of your caregiving role supports the argument that your reduced income enables the family's overall financial stability. Document everything - not just direct purchases for the kids, but your proportional share of mortgage/rent, utilities, food, transportation, and the opportunity cost of your reduced work hours. The pooled finances approach mentioned by others seems very promising for your situation. Good luck navigating this bureaucratic maze!

Thank you all so much for this helpful information! I feel much better prepared for his upcoming birthday now. I'm going to: 1) Make sure both the SSI and the Childhood Disability Benefits applications are being processed, 2) Create a rental agreement to avoid the one-third reduction rule, 3) Look into ABLE accounts for his savings, and 4) Use Claimyr to actually get through to SSA and confirm all of this information. This has been incredibly helpful!

I'm so sorry for your loss, and I admire how you're navigating all these complex benefits while caring for your son. I went through something similar when my brother became disabled at 17. One thing I learned that might help - when you create that rental agreement that StarSailor mentioned, make sure to document everything properly. We had to provide bank statements showing the rent payments were actually being made from his SSI account to mine. Also, regarding the timing - don't wait until after his 18th birthday to set this up. You can create the agreement to begin on his 18th birthday, which shows SSA it's a legitimate arrangement rather than something you're doing just to avoid the reduction. The SSA rep should be able to walk you through exactly what documentation they need. You're doing an amazing job advocating for your son during such a difficult time.

One last thing to consider - even though your husband is delaying until 67, you might want to discuss if it makes sense for him to file earlier to enable your spousal benefits, especially if your family longevity isn't exceptional. Sometimes the combined strategy works better when one spouse has a very small benefit compared to the other. You might run the numbers both ways to see which gives you more total household income over time.

I went through this exact situation 3 years ago! I was 62, my husband was 65, and I had the same misconception that I could claim spousal benefits while he delayed. The harsh reality is you absolutely cannot receive spousal benefits until your spouse is actively receiving their own benefits - no exceptions under current law. I ended up taking my own small benefit ($680/month) at 62 because waiting 5+ years for him to file made no financial sense. When he finally filed at his FRA, my payment did increase to the spousal amount, but it was still reduced because I had claimed early. One thing that helped me was using an online Social Security calculator to run different scenarios. Also, don't forget that if you're still working, there are earnings limits that could affect your benefits if you're under your FRA. The math usually favors taking the early benefit when yours is very small compared to the spousal amount, even with the reductions.

Welcome Isabella! This has been such a helpful thread for all of us dealing with the family benefits maze. Regarding PIA recalculations - I actually experienced this firsthand. About 4 months after I started receiving benefits, SSA sent me a letter saying they had recalculated my earnings record (apparently one of my employers from 2019 had reported wages late). My monthly benefit increased by about $85, and the family maximum went up proportionally. We got a nice back payment check, but it definitely threw off our budgeting for a few months. The adjustment affected everyone's benefits - mine, my spouse's, and our kids'. So Fiona's advice about being conservative in your first-year budgeting is spot on. I'd recommend keeping some cushion in your financial planning until you hit that one-year mark and everything stabilizes. Also, make sure you keep all your SSA correspondence! When they made the adjustment, having those original benefit letters helped me verify the calculations were correct.

Welcome to the community! This discussion has been incredibly valuable - I'm also navigating early retirement and family benefits, and the complexity is overwhelming. One thing I haven't seen mentioned yet is how the earnings test might affect your situation. Since you're taking benefits at 62, if you have any earned income (work, consulting, etc.) above the annual limit (around $22,320 for 2024), they'll reduce your benefits temporarily. But here's what's interesting - this earnings test applies to ALL family members' benefits, not just yours. So if you're planning to do any part-time work or consulting in retirement, make sure to factor this in alongside the family maximum calculations everyone has discussed. The earnings test can significantly impact your family's total monthly income, especially in those first few years before you reach full retirement age. Has anyone else dealt with the earnings test while receiving family benefits? I'd love to hear how it affected your planning.

Welcome to the community! As a newcomer here, I've been following this discussion with great interest since I'm approaching my own FRA in a few months and plan to keep working afterward. The information shared here has been incredibly valuable - especially the real experiences from people like Elliott who actually went through this situation. It's so reassuring to hear multiple confirmations that there truly are NO earnings limits once you reach FRA. I'm particularly grateful for the heads-up about tax implications. I hadn't considered that my Social Security benefits might become substantially taxable when combined with work income. That's definitely something I need to factor into my planning. One additional resource I'd like to mention for anyone still feeling uncertain: the SSA website has a retirement earnings test calculator that can help illustrate how earnings affect benefits at different ages. While it confirms what everyone here has said about FRA, it's sometimes helpful to see it in the official SSA format too. Thanks to everyone who contributed to this thread - you've provided more clarity than hours of online research could deliver!

As a newcomer to this community, I want to thank everyone for such a thorough and helpful discussion! I'm currently 64 and planning my retirement strategy, so this thread has been incredibly valuable in understanding what happens when you work past FRA. The consistent message from multiple people with real experience - that there are absolutely NO earnings limits once you reach FRA - is exactly what I needed to hear. It's amazing how much clearer this becomes when you hear from actual people who've lived through it rather than trying to decipher government websites. I'm particularly appreciative of the practical insights about tax implications and the potential for benefit increases from continued work. These are details you don't often see mentioned in the basic "what you need to know about Social Security" articles. One quick question for the group: for those who continued working past FRA, did you adjust your tax withholdings from your paychecks to account for the additional tax burden from having both work income and Social Security benefits? I'm trying to figure out if I should increase my withholding rate or just plan to make quarterly estimated payments. Thanks again to everyone who shared their experiences - this community is such a valuable resource!