Update: I called SSA this morning and finally got through after trying for 3 days! The rep confirmed what many of you said - they look at net earnings for self-employment. She also explained that they'll take the adjustment from future benefits next year after I file my taxes. I'm going to track my hours and income more carefully going forward, and I might talk to my accountant about restructuring. Thanks everyone for your help!

One thing I haven't seen mentioned yet is that you can request a waiver if the overpayment creates a financial hardship. I had to do this when I got hit with a $2,800 overpayment notice. You file Form SSA-632 and provide financial documentation showing that repaying would cause undue hardship. Also, keep detailed records of when you work vs. when you don't work each month. If you have months where you truly don't work at all in your consulting business, you can get full benefits for those months under the monthly earnings test that @Luca Bianchi mentioned. This saved me about $1,200 last year during the three months I took off due to a family emergency. The key is being proactive - don't wait for the overpayment notice. Report your estimated annual earnings to SSA early in the year so they can adjust your monthly payments accordingly.

u might try county records office where u got married they can give u copy of marriage license. also check old tax returns that's how my aunt found my uncles ssn

Just wanted to add my experience - I was in a very similar situation when my ex-husband passed. We'd been divorced for years and I had no idea where any of his paperwork was. The SSA office was actually really helpful once I got there. They were able to locate his record using just his full name, date of birth, and our marriage date. I brought my driver's license, our marriage certificate, and his death certificate. The whole process took about 45 minutes once I got called back (the wait was longer than the actual appointment!). Don't stress too much about having his exact SSN - they have ways to work around that. Good luck with your application!

We didn't need the agreement notarized - just signed by both parties with the date. As for taxes, my accountant had me report it as rental income, but there were offsetting expenses (utilities, home repairs, etc.) so it didn't affect our tax situation much. Your mom should probably consult with a tax professional about her specific situation, though.

Good luck with your appointment! I went through something similar with my dad's SSI when he moved in with us after his stroke. One thing that really helped was bringing a calculator to the meeting to show exactly how we split expenses. We calculated total monthly costs (property tax ÷ 12, average utilities, groceries, etc.) and divided by the number of adults in the household. Having those numbers ready made the conversation go much smoother. Also, don't let them intimidate you - you have the right to ask questions and get clear explanations of their decisions. The caseworker we dealt with was actually pretty helpful once we showed we were serious about following the rules properly.

WAIT - just becoming a representative won't automatically solve the tax form issue. Those 1099-SSA forms and access to her earnings record requires specific authorization. Make sure box 7

Thank you for this specific detail! This is exactly the kind of thing I would have missed and then been frustrated about later. I'll make sure that box is checked and those exact words are included!

After reading everyone's responses, I think I need to reconsider my approach. The risks to my current husband's financial security seem too great with the divorce-remarry strategy. I'm going to use that Claimyr service to connect with SSA and discuss my specific situation. Maybe there are options I haven't considered. Does anyone know if there's a financial advisor who specializes in these complex Social Security cases? I'm willing to pay for professional advice given how much money is at stake over our lifetimes.

Yes, there are financial advisors who specialize in Social Security optimization! Look for fee-only advisors who are specifically trained in Social Security claiming strategies. The National Association of Personal Financial Advisors (NAPFA) has a search tool where you can filter for advisors with Social Security expertise. Also consider Registered Social Security Analysts (RSSA) - they have specialized training in these complex scenarios. Given the potential $1000/month difference you mentioned, paying $500-1000 for professional analysis could easily pay for itself within the first year. Before meeting with any advisor, document all the key details: both spouses' earnings records, projected benefits at different claiming ages, health status, and your financial goals. This will help them run accurate scenarios for you. The fact that you're thinking about your current husband's protection shows you're approaching this thoughtfully. A good advisor will help you weigh the financial trade-offs against the risks we've all mentioned here.