Based on the detailed situation you've described, I would DEFINITELY apply. Here's why: 1. Multiple jobs don't necessarily disqualify you - SSA has specific exclusions and calculations for families of disabled children 2. Severe autism requiring constant supervision meets their medical criteria 3. Therapy expenses may be deductible as Impairment-Related Work Expenses (IRWEs) 4. Even if you're denied initially (which happens to most people), the appeals process often results in approval Pro tip: Request a detailed explanation in writing for any denial. This will help you address specific issues in your appeal.

I'm a parent of a 7-year-old with severe autism who successfully got approved for SSI last year, so I wanted to share some specific advice based on our experience. First, don't let the income concern stop you from applying - the deeming rules are more favorable than most people realize. When SSA calculated our eligibility, they excluded my husband's overtime pay that went directly to autism-related expenses, plus they gave us allowances for our other children. The key is documentation. Make sure every medical report explicitly states your son's functional limitations in daily activities like self-care, communication, and safety awareness. We had to get supplemental letters from his therapists describing exactly how his autism affects his ability to function independently. Also, keep detailed records of ALL autism-related expenses - therapy copays, specialized equipment, dietary supplements, even mileage to appointments. These can potentially be deducted from your countable income. One last tip: consider working with a disability attorney if you get denied. Many work on contingency and only get paid if you win. The process is frustrating but absolutely worth it for the financial support and automatic Medicaid eligibility.

wait i'm confused about something - if you're making 65k why do you even care about survivor benefits? thats way more than most of us get from ss and work combined. just curious

Just wanted to chime in as someone who works in retirement planning - you're absolutely making the right call to wait until FRA. With your current income situation, the earnings test would essentially negate any benefit from claiming early anyway, so you'd be taking a permanent reduction for no real gain. One thing I'd add that others haven't mentioned: when you do switch to your own retirement benefit at 70, make sure you understand that your survivor benefit stops at that point. You can't collect both simultaneously. But given that your own benefit will be higher (especially with the delayed retirement credits), that's still the optimal strategy. Also, keep excellent records of your application dates and any SSA communications. The transition from survivor benefits to retirement benefits can sometimes get messy administratively, and having documentation helps resolve any issues quickly. Your overall strategy sounds very solid - maximize the survivor benefit by waiting for FRA, then maximize your own retirement benefit by waiting until 70. That's textbook optimal planning for someone in your situation.

I want to thank everyone for the incredibly helpful advice. I've gathered all our documents (birth certificates, marriage certificate, my wife's medical records) and plan to start my application online tomorrow using Chrome as suggested. I'll clearly note my wife's terminal condition in the remarks section and hope it gets flagged for the TERI program. After I get my application submitted, I'll help my wife apply for her benefits and clearly indicate she's applying for both her retirement and spousal benefits. Based on the calculations shared, she should receive around $1,350 total between the two, which will really help with our expenses. I'm also going to check out that Claimyr service since it sounds like I'll need to speak with SSA at some point about the spousal benefits. Being able to avoid long wait times would be a huge relief given my caregiving responsibilities. You've all been so supportive and informative - it's made a stressful situation much more manageable. I'll update on how things go after we submit our applications.

I'm so sorry to hear about your wife's diagnosis. As someone who works with seniors navigating Social Security, I wanted to add a few practical tips that might help: First, when you submit your online application, save a copy of everything before hitting submit. The system can be glitchy and you don't want to lose your work. Also, after submission, you'll get a receipt number - keep that handy as it helps SSA locate your case quickly. For your wife's application, consider doing it as soon as possible after yours is processed. There's no advantage to waiting, and given her condition, getting benefits started sooner rather than later is important. One thing I haven't seen mentioned - if you're caring for her full-time and she qualifies for disability benefits due to her terminal illness, that could potentially change the benefit calculation. Terminal cancer often qualifies for expedited disability processing under their Compassionate Allowances program, which could provide higher monthly payments than regular retirement benefits. You might want to ask about this when you speak with SSA. The disability route could be worth exploring alongside the retirement/spousal benefits path. Sending you both strength during this challenging time.

To summarize what's been discussed and add a bit more clarity: 1. The earliest your husband could receive spousal benefits is age 62, with a reduction (approximately 30-35% less than at his FRA). 2. If he significantly reduces his work or stops completely at 57, this could affect his own future benefit calculation since SSA uses the highest 35 years of earnings. Low-earning or zero years could reduce his personal benefit. 3. The spousal benefit would be up to 50% of your Primary Insurance Amount (your benefit at your FRA), but is reduced if claimed before his FRA. 4. He will always receive the higher of either his own benefit or the spousal benefit, not both. 5. For survivor benefits, he could claim as early as age 60 if you predeceased him, with a reduction. At his FRA, he would receive 100% of your benefit. 6. If your husband is considering reducing work significantly at 57, you might want to evaluate other retirement income sources to bridge the gap until he can claim Social Security benefits.

One thing to keep in mind is that when you switch from survivor benefits to your own retirement benefits at 70, make sure you understand how this affects the spousal benefit calculation for your husband. The spousal benefit will be based on YOUR Primary Insurance Amount (what you'd get at your FRA), not the higher amount you'll receive by waiting until 70. So even though you're maximizing your own benefit by waiting, your husband's potential spousal benefit won't increase beyond that 50% of your PIA. Also, since you mentioned you both had comparable earnings, definitely run the numbers on his own projected benefit vs. the spousal benefit before making any decisions about him reducing work at 57.

As someone new to this community but dealing with similar questions, I wanted to share what I've learned from researching this topic extensively. The key thing that helped me understand spousal benefits is that there are really two main scenarios: **Scenario 1: Your own benefit is higher** - You'll receive your own benefit amount - You won't get any additional spousal benefit **Scenario 2: 50% of your husband's benefit is higher than your own** - You'll receive your own benefit PLUS a spousal "top-up" to reach 50% of his benefit - This only happens after he files for his benefits One strategy some couples use is having the lower-earning spouse claim their own reduced benefit at 62, then when the higher-earning spouse files at 67, they automatically get bumped up to the higher spousal amount if it applies. But like others have mentioned, the earnings test and permanent reductions make this tricky. I'd definitely recommend using the calculators on ssa.gov and maybe even getting a professional consultation. The peace of mind is worth it when you're talking about decisions that affect decades of income! Hope this helps clarify things a bit. This stuff is genuinely confusing even for people who research it extensively!

As a newcomer here, I just wanted to say how helpful this entire thread has been! I'm in a very similar situation to Kevin - my husband is a few years older and we're trying to navigate the best Social Security strategy. One thing I learned from reading everyone's responses is that timing really is everything with these decisions. It sounds like the key factors are: - Your respective earnings histories and benefit amounts - Whether you need income before your husband files - Your health and life expectancy expectations - Whether you'll still be working I'm definitely going to follow the advice about creating a my.ssa.gov account and potentially consulting with a specialist. The point about this potentially being a difference of tens of thousands of dollars over a lifetime really hit home. Thanks to everyone who shared their experiences and knowledge - it's clear this community is a great resource for navigating these complex government benefits!