I'm really glad to see this discussion happening because these Social Security rules can be so confusing for people in complicated situations like yours. Just wanted to add one more perspective as someone who's helped family members navigate similar issues - it's worth noting that the survivor benefit amount you'll receive is based on what your ex-husband was receiving (or entitled to receive) at the time of his death, not necessarily his full retirement age benefit. If he had already started collecting Social Security before he passed away, that could affect the calculation. Also, since you mentioned you're 60 now, you might want to consider whether it makes sense to start collecting reduced survivor benefits now (at 85.7% of the full amount) versus waiting until your full retirement age for the unreduced amount, especially given your remarriage plans. The financial planning aspect can be just as important as understanding the eligibility rules!

I'm new to this community but wanted to share something that might help - my mom went through almost this exact situation a few years ago. She was divorced from my dad for about 8 years when he passed away (they'd been married 12 years), and she remarried at age 61. The Social Security office initially told her she couldn't get survivor benefits because she remarried, but when she brought in documentation and insisted on speaking with a supervisor, they corrected the mistake. Turns out the first representative was thinking of the rules for younger widows. The key thing that helped her was having all her paperwork organized - marriage certificate, divorce decree, death certificate, and proof of her new marriage date. She also wrote down all the relevant rule numbers and regulations she'd researched beforehand. It took a few visits, but she eventually got everything sorted out and has been receiving the survivor benefits for three years now. Don't let anyone discourage you from pursuing what you're entitled to!

One more consideration: have you looked into whether you might qualify for any needs-based assistance programs that could help bridge the gap until you reach your full retirement age? Things like SNAP benefits (food stamps), energy assistance programs, etc. might help you manage if you decide to stop working before claiming Social Security. Also, some states have additional supplemental programs for seniors with limited income. These resources could potentially help you delay claiming until at least 65 when Medicare kicks in, which would reduce your healthcare costs significantly compared to marketplace insurance before 65.

Sean, as someone who went through this exact decision two years ago, I can share what worked for me. I was 61, similar health concerns about physical work, and also had limited retirement savings. Here's what I wish I'd known: the earnings test isn't just about losing money now - those "lost" benefits actually get credited back to you at full retirement age, so it's more like forced savings than a penalty. BUT the real issue is cash flow - you need money to live on TODAY. My recommendation based on your situation: try to find less physical work (even if it pays less) and aim for claiming at 64-65. This gives you a much smaller permanent reduction (13-20% vs 30%) and gets you closer to Medicare eligibility. I ended up taking a part-time customer service job that paid about $10k/year - enough to qualify for some assistance programs but not enough to trigger major earnings test issues. It was tough for a year, but claiming at 65 instead of 62 means I get an extra $400/month for life. Don't let fear push you into a hasty decision. Talk to SSA directly (use that Claimyr service someone mentioned), and maybe consider contacting your local Area Agency on Aging - they often have benefits counselors who can help you explore all your options.

I'm sorry to hear about your health challenges, Charlie. Unfortunately, the other commenters are correct - you cannot switch to SSDI after reaching your Full Retirement Age. However, I'd strongly encourage you to follow up on that benefit recalculation suggestion! Since you worked part-time until recently, those earnings from ages 62-67 might have increased your benefit amount. SSA is supposed to automatically recalculate annually, but sometimes they miss it or there are delays. Call them and specifically ask for a "benefit recalculation" based on your recent work history. Even a small increase would help with your medical expenses. Also, make sure to check if you qualify for any Medicare assistance programs for your arthritis medications - every little bit helps when you're on a fixed income.

I'm a disability advocate and wanted to add some additional perspective here. While everyone is correct that you cannot switch to SSDI after FRA, I want to emphasize how important it is to pursue that benefit recalculation that others mentioned. I've seen cases where people who worked even part-time after claiming early retirement got meaningful increases - sometimes $50-100+ per month - which really adds up over time. Also, given your rheumatoid arthritis and degenerative disc disease, please make sure you're aware of all the disability-related assistance programs available through Medicare, Medicaid (if you qualify), and your state. Many people don't realize there are programs specifically for medication costs, medical equipment, and even home modifications. Your local Area Agency on Aging can be a great resource for navigating these programs. Don't let the early retirement penalty discourage you from getting every benefit you're entitled to!

I'm so sorry you're dealing with this nightmare! As someone who has navigated similar SSA bureaucratic messes, I wanted to share a few things that might help: First, DEFINITELY file that SSA-632 waiver form that others mentioned - you have a strong case since this was clearly their system error, not anything you did wrong. Second, I'd suggest keeping a detailed log of every interaction you have with SSA going forward. Write down dates, times, who you spoke with, and exactly what was said. This documentation becomes crucial if you need to escalate or appeal. Also, consider reaching out to your local congressperson's office. They often have staff who specialize in helping constituents with federal agency issues like this. Sometimes a call from a congressional office can get things moving faster than months of individual effort. The fact that they're acknowledging he qualifies for adult disabled child benefits AND that they owe him back payments suggests they know they messed up. Don't let them intimidate you into just accepting this overpayment - you have rights and options here. Stay strong - this kind of bureaucratic mess is frustrating beyond words, but it IS fixable with persistence!

This situation sounds incredibly stressful, and I'm sorry you're dealing with SSA's bureaucratic mess! As a newcomer here, I wanted to add that you should also ask about requesting an "Administrative Review" of the overpayment determination itself - this is separate from the waiver request and challenges whether the overpayment calculation is even correct in the first place. Given that they're saying this goes back to 2018 but your son only turned 18 in 2021, there's clearly something wrong with their timeline. An administrative review can force them to show their work on how they calculated these amounts. Also, while you're gathering documentation, try to get copies of ALL benefit award letters and payment records for your son from 2018 forward. Sometimes SSA's notices reference the wrong time periods or mix up different types of benefits. Having your own paper trail will help you challenge any errors. The good news is that multiple people here have dealt with similar situations and gotten them resolved - you're definitely not alone in this fight!

my neighbor said if you work over the limit they just take it back later not right away

I'm in a similar situation - turning 62 soon and trying to figure out the best strategy. One thing I learned from my research is that you should also consider the tax implications. If you're working and collecting SS, your benefits might become taxable depending on your "combined income" (adjusted gross income + nontaxable interest + half of SS benefits). For single filers, if combined income is over $25,000, up to 50% of benefits are taxable. Over $34,000 and up to 85% can be taxable. This could affect your overall financial picture even if you stay under the earnings limit.