Will Social Security require proof of common law marriage for survivor benefits when I'm 19 weeks short of 10-year marriage?

Unfortunately, SSA is very strict about the 10-year marriage duration requirement for ex-spouse survivor benefits. They follow legal marriage documentation (marriage certificates and divorce decrees) for determining the official length of marriage. Common law marriage MIGHT be considered, but only if you lived in a state that legally recognizes common law marriage, and even then, you'd need substantial documentation to prove it existed before your legal marriage. Which state did you live in during those 2 years before getting legally married?

my cousin went thru this exact thing!!! SS is SUPER strict about the 10 yr thing u need to check if ur state allows common law marriage cuz not all do. if it does u need proof like did u file taxes together or have mail to same address or joint bank accts? they make it so hard to prove!!!

The Social Security Administration follows very specific rules about marriage duration for divorced spouse survivor benefits. The 10-year duration requirement is written into the law, and they generally only recognize legally documented marriages. However, since you mentioned Colorado, that's actually helpful. Colorado is one of the few states that does recognize common law marriage. For the SSA to consider your common law relationship as part of your marriage duration, you would need to: 1. Prove you lived in a state that recognizes common law marriage (Colorado does) 2. Provide evidence that you and your partner considered yourselves married 3. Present documentation that you presented yourselves as a married couple to the community This could include joint bank statements, lease agreements showing cohabitation, affidavits from friends/family who considered you married, insurance policies listing you as spouses, and any documents where you identified as a married couple. I recommend gathering as much of this documentation as possible before applying. The SSA field office will make a determination based on the evidence you provide.

This situation makes me so angry!!!! My friend missed the 10-year mark by SIX WEEKS and SSA denied her. SIX WEEKS after 9+ years of marriage!!! The system is totally broken. They don't care about real relationships, just some arbitrary number on paper. Why should 9 years and 8 months be treated differently than 10 years? Makes absolutely no sense. The people who make these rules have clearly never experienced loss. Sorry for the rant but I hate seeing people get caught in these ridiculous technicalities.

An important update on your situation: If you can establish that you had a valid common law marriage in Colorado before your legal marriage, the SSA might consider the beginning date of your marriage to be when the common law marriage began, not just the date on your marriage certificate. In Colorado, a common law marriage requires: - Both parties being free to marry (not married to others) - Mutual consent or agreement to be married - Public representation as a married couple The burden of proof will be on you to establish the earlier date. Gather documentation like: - Lease agreements showing cohabitation - Joint financial accounts - Insurance policies - Affidavits from family/friends who understood you to be in a marriage-like relationship - Any cards or letters addressing you as a couple - Photos from that period showing you as a couple When you apply, be upfront about the situation. Tell them you believe your marriage actually meets the 10-year requirement when including the common law period in Colorado.

I tried calling the SSA about a similar situation last month but couldn't get through to anyone who could actually help me. Spent over 3 hours on hold only to be disconnected twice. So frustrating!

Thank you all for the helpful advice. I'm going to collect whatever documentation I can find from our time living together in Colorado - old bank statements, lease agreement, photos, etc. I'll also ask some family members to write statements confirming they knew us as a couple during that time. It still feels like navigating a bureaucratic maze, but at least now I have some direction. I'll update the group after my appointment with SSA next month.

My neighbor just went thru this exact thing!!!! She had to provide tons of proof for common law but eventually got approved. Tax returns helped her the most i think

I work with seniors on benefits issues, and I've seen the SSA accept common law marriage as part of the 10-year duration in certain circumstances. Colorado is definitely one of the states where this is possible. My advice is to prepare a written statement explaining your situation before your appointment, along with a chronological outline of your relationship and all the supporting documentation you've gathered. This makes it easier for the claims representative to understand and evaluate your case. Also, if your initial claim is denied, remember you have 60 days to file for reconsideration, and then you can request a hearing with an Administrative Law Judge if needed. Many people give up after the first denial, but persistence often pays off with these complex cases.

I'm sorry for your loss and the added stress of navigating this bureaucratic maze during such a difficult time. As someone new to this community, I wanted to share what I've learned from a similar situation in my family. Colorado absolutely recognizes common law marriage, which is great news for you. One thing I haven't seen mentioned yet is that you might want to check if you have any old tax returns where you filed as "married filing jointly" or "married filing separately" during those pre-legal marriage years - even if you filed separately, the IRS records showing your address history could help establish cohabitation. Also, don't forget about utility bills, voter registration records, or even old Christmas cards addressed to "Mr. and Mrs." - these small pieces of evidence can add up. The key is showing a pattern of presenting yourselves as married to the community. Wishing you the best with your appointment next month!

I'm so sorry for your loss, Felicity. What a frustrating situation to deal with while you're grieving. I just wanted to add one more piece of advice based on what I've seen in similar cases - when you gather your documentation, try to get copies of everything rather than originals when possible, since SSA sometimes keeps submitted documents. Also, if you have any old medical records from that time period (doctor visits, insurance claims, etc.) that show both of your names or list you as emergency contacts for each other, those can be surprisingly helpful in establishing your relationship status. The fact that you lived together in Colorado for 2 years before the legal marriage really gives you a fighting chance here. Don't let anyone discourage you from pursuing this - you deserve these benefits after being together for over 11 years total. The arbitrary 10-year rule shouldn't penalize you for 19 weeks when you clearly had a committed long-term relationship.

I'm new to this community but wanted to offer some support and additional thoughts. As someone who has helped family members navigate SSA claims, I'd suggest also looking into whether you have any old credit reports or loan applications from that time period where you might have listed each other as co-applicants or references. Sometimes people forget about these documents, but they can show financial interdependence during your common law period. Also, if you had any joint memberships (gym, Costco, etc.) or shared cell phone plans during those 2 years in Colorado, those records might still be available. The key is building a comprehensive picture of your life as a married couple before the legal ceremony. I know it's overwhelming to gather all this documentation while grieving, but Colorado's recognition of common law marriage really does give you a legitimate shot at meeting that 10-year requirement. Don't let the bureaucracy intimidate you - you have every right to pursue these benefits after an 11+ year relationship. Sending you strength for your upcoming appointment!