Can I claim Social Security survivor benefits after 30+ years divorced and he's remarried?
I've been doing some research on Social Security and need advice before making that dreaded phone call to SSA. My situation is a bit complicated. I was married to my first husband for almost 10 years (9 years, 11 months, and some days to be exact). We divorced over 30 years ago, and both remarried different people. He passed away about 4 years ago. We didn't have any children together. I'm now 66 and trying to maximize my Social Security benefits. I'm wondering if I qualify for any type of survivor benefits based on his record, despite the long divorce and subsequent marriages? Does the fact that we were just shy of the 10-year mark completely disqualify me? I've heard conflicting information about whether ex-spouses can claim these benefits. Anyone dealt with a similar situation or know the answer before I brave the SSA phone system? Any advice appreciated!
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Andre Laurent
Unfortunately, you won't qualify for survivor benefits based on your ex-husband's record. SSA has a firm requirement that marriages must last at least 10 years before divorce to qualify for any ex-spouse benefits. Being even one day short of 10 years disqualifies you completely - there's no partial credit or rounding up. The fact that you lived together before marriage doesn't count either; SSA only recognizes the legal marriage period.
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Carmen Diaz
•Ugh, that's what I was afraid of. So close! Is it worth even trying to call them about this, or is this rule absolutely set in stone?
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AstroAce
my aunt was in almost same boat but she was 2 months short of 10 yrs. she still called ssa and tried anyway but they said no. rules r rules with them
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Carmen Diaz
•That's really frustrating to hear, but thanks for sharing your aunt's experience. Saved me some hope and disappointment.
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Zoe Kyriakidou
Wow, that's tough being just a few days short! My friend was in a kinda similar situation last year but she made the 10-year cutoff by about 3 weeks. Got approved for benefits!
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Jamal Brown
•The SSA is RIDICULOUS with these arbitrary cutoffs!!! My brother missed disability by ONE POINT on their stupid scale and got nothing. This 10-year rule is just as bad. They don't care about real people's situations AT ALL. The whole system needs to be overhauled!!!
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Mei Zhang
Since you're 66, have you filed for your own retirement benefits yet? Even though you can't get survivor benefits from your ex-husband, you should focus on maximizing your own retirement benefits. At 66, you've reached your Full Retirement Age (FRA), which means you can file without any reductions. If you have a decent earnings history, this might be your best option now. Did you have other marriages that lasted 10+ years that might qualify you for spousal benefits?
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Carmen Diaz
•Thanks for the suggestion. Yes, I've already filed for my own retirement benefits. They're modest since I was a stay-at-home mom for many years. My second marriage only lasted 7 years, so no luck there either. I was just hoping to boost my monthly amount somehow.
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Liam McConnell
This is slightly off-topic but I was in a similar boat trying to get benefits from my ex's record and spent WEEKS trying to get through to someone at Social Security. So frustrating! Finally used a service called Claimyr (claimyr.com) that got me connected to a real person at SSA in less than 10 minutes. They have a video showing how it works at https://youtu.be/Z-BRbJw3puU. Just wanted to share in case you do need to call them about anything else.
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Amara Oluwaseyi
•Just want to add that while the 10-year marriage duration requirement is indeed strict, there are some other potential options worth exploring. If you had other jobs throughout your life where you paid into Social Security, make sure SSA has all your earnings recorded correctly. Sometimes they miss years of work which can affect your benefit amount. Also, if your second husband is still living and you were married 10+ years, you could potentially claim on his record (if it would result in a higher benefit). And yes, calling SSA directly is your best bet to review all options. That Claimyr service the previous poster mentioned is helpful - I've used it too when I couldn't get through normally.
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Carmen Diaz
Thank you everyone for the responses! After checking my paperwork more carefully, I confirmed we were married for exactly 9 years, 11 months, and 6 days. So close it hurts! I wish I had known about this 10-year rule back then - would have delayed the divorce paperwork by a month! I appreciate the suggestions about checking my earnings record. I'll do that. And I'll check out that Claimyr service if I need to call SSA. Seems worth it to avoid the hours of hold music and disconnections.
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Zoe Kyriakidou
•That's so tough being less than a month away from qualifying! My grandma always says "if I knew then what I know now" about her SS benefits too!
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Andre Laurent
One more thought - since you're at your FRA already, you should look into whether you might qualify for SSI (Supplemental Security Income) if your current Social Security retirement benefit is very low. SSI can provide additional income for those with limited resources. The qualification rules are complicated, but it might be worth investigating. SSI is different from regular Social Security retirement benefits and has different eligibility requirements based on financial need rather than work history.
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Carmen Diaz
•Thank you for this suggestion. My retirement benefit is about $1,050/month, which is tight but probably too high for SSI from what I've read. I do have some savings that would likely disqualify me anyway. I think I just need to accept that I missed the 10-year mark and move forward. Really appreciate everyone's help though!
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