Social Security ex-spouse benefits: Do I qualify with 10 years first marriage then 5 years remarriage to same person?
I'm trying to figure out my Social Security options as I approach retirement age (turning 62 next January). My marriage situation is a bit unusual - I was married to my ex for 10 years, then we divorced. After 3 years apart, we reconciled and got remarried, but the second marriage only lasted 5 years before we divorced again (this time for good). So in total, we were married for 15 years, but not continuously. Does anyone know if I still qualify for ex-spouse benefits under the 10-year marriage rule? Or does the break in our marriage mean I can't claim on his record? He made significantly more than I did throughout our working years (he was an engineer while I worked part-time in retail while raising our kids). His benefit would be much higher than mine. I've tried calling the SSA three times, but keep getting disconnected after waiting on hold for over an hour. The local office has no appointments available for the next two months. Any help would be appreciated!
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Isabella Santos
Yes, you qualify! The 10-year marriage rule only requires that you were married for at least 10 consecutive years before divorcing. The fact that you remarried the same person later doesn't affect your eligibility for ex-spouse benefits based on that first 10-year marriage. You can file for those benefits as early as 62, but remember you'll get a reduced amount if you file before your Full Retirement Age (FRA). Also, you must be unmarried currently to claim ex-spouse benefits.
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Malik Johnson
•Thank you SO much for the clear answer! That's a huge relief. Do you know if I need to provide both divorce decrees when I apply? And does the fact that we were remarried to each other complicate the paperwork at all?
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Ravi Sharma
I think the other poster is WRONG! When my sister tried to claim on her ex's record, SSA combined all their marriage periods and said it wasn't enough. They told her all marriages to the same person count as ONE marriage for the 10 year rule!!! Better check with SSA directly before you count on this.
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Isabella Santos
•That's not correct. SSA policy specifically addresses this situation. Each marriage stands on its own for the duration requirement. If the first marriage lasted 10+ years, the claimant qualifies regardless of subsequent marriages to the same person. Your sister's situation was likely different - perhaps her first marriage alone didn't reach 10 years?
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Freya Larsen
I had almost the exact same situation! Married 11 years, divorced, remarried him 2 years later for 4 more years. I'm getting benefits based on his record now with no problem. The SSA only cared about documenting that first marriage that met the 10-year requirement. They did ask for both marriage certificates and both divorce decrees though, so have those ready. And be prepared to wait - it took about 3 months for my application to process.
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Malik Johnson
•This is so helpful to hear from someone who went through almost the same thing! Did you apply online or in person? I'm wondering which would be faster.
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Omar Hassan
have u tried the my social security online account? u might be able to see ur benefit options there without calling. thats what i did when i was checking about my ex husband benefits
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Malik Johnson
•I did create an account, but it doesn't seem to show me what I'd get from my ex's record - just estimates based on my own work history. Maybe I'm missing something in the interface?
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Chloe Taylor
I was in a similar situation trying to reach SSA for weeks about my ex-spouse benefits. After failing to get through on the phone and not being able to get answers online, I used a service called Claimyr (claimyr.com) that got me connected to an actual SSA agent in about 15 minutes. They have a video showing how it works: https://youtu.be/Z-BRbJw3puU The agent confirmed that marriages are counted separately, so your first 10-year marriage does qualify you for ex-spouse benefits regardless of the second marriage to the same person. Make sure you have both marriage certificates and divorce decrees when you apply.
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ShadowHunter
•Does this Claimyr thing actually work? Seems sketchy to me...
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Chloe Taylor
•Yes, it worked for me - got through to someone at SSA when I'd been trying for weeks on my own. Just connects you to the regular SSA line but jumps you past the hold time somehow.
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Diego Ramirez
i think most people dont know that there are actually different rules for ex-spouse benefits vs widow(er) benefits. for ex-spouse the 10 yr rule applies but for widow its only 9 months of marriage required! just wanted to mention this since it confuses a lot of people.
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Freya Larsen
•That's a good point, but not really relevant to OP's situation since her ex is still alive (she's asking about divorced spouse benefits, not surviving divorced spouse benefits).
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ShadowHunter
My cousin's wife's sister got denied because there was some rule about remarrying the same person! Not saying your wrong but definitely double check before you count on getting those benefits. The SSA has all kinds of weird rules they don't tell you about until they deny your claim!!!
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Isabella Santos
•There's no SSA rule specifically prohibiting ex-spouse benefits when you've remarried the same person, as long as that first marriage lasted 10+ years. Your cousin's wife's sister was likely denied for a different reason - perhaps she was remarried to someone else at the time of application or her first marriage didn't reach the 10-year mark.
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Malik Johnson
UPDATE: I finally got through to SSA this morning after trying for 3 days! The rep confirmed what most of you said - my first 10-year marriage does qualify me for ex-spouse benefits. She said I'll need to provide both marriage certificates and both divorce decrees when I apply. She also mentioned that since I'll be applying before my full retirement age, my benefit will be reduced permanently - getting about 70% of what I would at full retirement age. But even with the reduction, it's still better than my own benefit would be. Thanks everyone for your help! This forum has been more helpful than trying to navigate the SSA website.
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Freya Larsen
•So glad you got confirmation! One more thing to consider - make sure you check if your own retirement benefit might grow to be larger than the ex-spouse benefit over time. Sometimes it makes sense to claim the ex-spouse benefit first, then switch to your own later if it becomes larger (especially if you continue working).
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