Do multiple marriages to same person count toward Social Security's 10-year requirement?

Unfortunately, Social Security does NOT combine your marriage periods when determining eligibility for divorced spouse benefits. Each marriage needs to have lasted at least 10 years on its own to qualify. Since your longest marriage was only 6 years, you wouldn't meet the requirement based on what you've shared. This is a common misconception, but the 10-year duration must be from a single continuous marriage.

my sister had almost the same situation and SSA told her no way. the 10 yrs has to be one continuous marriage, they don't add them together. really stinks because she was like 9.5 years in one marriage!!

There's actually one small possibility - if your divorce decree from the first marriage wasn't finalized before you remarried, it might count as one continuous marriage. Worth checking the exact dates on your paperwork. Also, if you're eligible for retirement benefits on your own record, you should still file for those even if you can't get the ex-spouse benefits. Have you checked your own estimated benefit amount on the SSA website?

I went through something similar trying to figure out if I qualified for my ex's benefits. Spent weeks trying to get through to someone at Social Security who could give me a straight answer. I finally used a service called Claimyr (claimyr.com) that got me connected to an actual SSA agent in about 20 minutes instead of waiting on hold for hours or getting disconnected. They have a video showing how it works: https://youtu.be/Z-BRbJw3puU. The agent was able to check my specific situation and confirm exactly what I qualified for. Might save you some frustration!

THE WHOLE SYSTEM IS RIGGED AGAINST WOMEN!!! This 10-year rule is ARBITRARY and UNFAIR!! My friend was married for 26 YEARS, raised 4 kids while her husband worked, but because they weren't LEGALLY married (common law) she gets NOTHING from his Social Security!!! Meanwhile people who never worked a day in their lives get SSI!!!!

Have you considered going back to your ex and asking to get remarried just long enough to hit the 10 yr mark? My aunt did this! They got remarried, waited till they hit exactly 10 years then divorced again! They both knew it was just for the benefits lol

Just to clarify an important point for everyone in this thread - even if you do qualify for ex-spouse benefits by meeting the 10-year marriage requirement, you don't get both your own benefit AND your ex's benefit. Social Security will pay your own retirement benefit first, and if the ex-spouse benefit would be higher, you get the difference added to reach that higher amount. Also, claiming on an ex's record doesn't reduce their benefit or affect any benefit their current spouse might receive.

what about if you were married THREE times to the same person?? asking for a friend lol

I've been dealing with Social Security for 30+ years (former paralegal specializing in elder law), and I can confirm what others have said - they don't combine marriage periods. However, I would recommend you get an in-person appointment at your local SSA office with all your marriage and divorce documentation. Sometimes there are unusual circumstances with divorce timing, ceremonial vs. legal marriage dates, etc. that might work in your favor. Worth having them review your specific situation rather than just accepting the general rule.

I work as a Social Security disability advocate and want to add something important that hasn't been mentioned yet - if you're currently unmarried and your ex-husband is receiving Social Security retirement or disability benefits, you may still be able to get divorced spouse benefits even without meeting the 10-year rule IF you're caring for his child who is under 16 or disabled. This is called "mother's benefits" or "father's benefits" and doesn't have the 10-year marriage requirement. Also, if your ex-husband has passed away, the rules for survivor benefits are different - you'd only need to have been married for 9 months (with some exceptions). Just wanted to make sure you're aware of all possible options for your situation.

I'm a retired Social Security field office manager, and I want to emphasize something that several people have touched on but bears repeating: the timing of your divorce decree vs. remarriage is absolutely critical here. If there was ANY overlap - meaning you remarried before your first divorce was legally finalized - Social Security would consider it one continuous marriage. This happens more often than you'd think, especially when people reconcile during divorce proceedings. I've seen cases where couples thought they were divorced but the paperwork wasn't properly filed or there were delays in processing. Get the exact dates from your court records, not just what you remember. Also, some states have different rules about when a divorce becomes "final" - it might be the date signed, the date filed, or even 30+ days later. This could literally be the difference between qualifying for benefits or not. Don't give up until you've verified those exact legal dates!

I'm going through a similar situation right now and wanted to share what I learned from my local SSA office. They told me that even if the marriages don't combine, there might be other factors to consider. For instance, if you were married in a state that recognizes common law marriage during that gap period between your divorces, or if you lived together as married during that time, it could potentially affect how they calculate the marriage duration. Also, I found out that some divorce decrees have specific language about when the marriage is considered "dissolved" versus when it's legally finalized - sometimes there's a waiting period. It's worth having them review not just your marriage certificates and divorce decrees, but also any separation agreements or reconciliation documents you might have. The SSA representative I spoke with said they've seen cases where people assumed they didn't qualify but actually did due to technicalities in the legal documentation. Don't lose hope yet!

I'm a benefits counselor and want to add one more important point - if you do find that your marriages don't combine and you don't qualify for ex-spouse benefits, make sure you're maximizing your own Social Security benefits. Since you mentioned being a stay-at-home mom and working part-time jobs, you might want to consider working a few more years at higher-paying jobs if possible to increase your own benefit amount. Even working part-time at $15-20/hour can significantly boost your Social Security calculation since it's based on your highest 35 years of earnings. Also, delaying retirement past your full retirement age (if you can afford to) increases your benefit by about 8% per year until age 70. Sometimes focusing on what you CAN control is more productive than what you can't. That said, definitely still pursue checking those divorce dates - you never know what you might discover!

I'm a recently retired Social Security claims specialist, and I want to emphasize what several others have mentioned about getting an official review of your specific documentation. In my 25 years processing claims, I've seen numerous cases where the initial assumption about marriage duration was incorrect due to legal technicalities. Here's what I'd recommend: 1) Request certified copies of ALL your divorce decrees and marriage certificates from the courts (not just what you have at home), 2) Look specifically for any "nunc pro tunc" orders that might have changed effective dates retroactively, and 3) Check if your state had any waiting periods or cooling-off requirements that could affect when marriages/divorces were legally effective. Also, don't rely on calling the 1-800 number - schedule an appointment at your local field office and bring everything in person. The field office staff have access to policy manuals and can make determinations that phone representatives often can't. I've seen cases where people were initially told they didn't qualify, but after a thorough document review, they actually did meet the requirements. It's worth the extra effort to be absolutely certain before you give up on this benefit opportunity.

As someone who's been researching Social Security benefits extensively for my own family planning, I want to add that there's one more avenue you might want to explore that I haven't seen mentioned yet. If you have any military service or government employment during your marriages, there could be additional considerations that affect how your marriage duration is calculated for benefits purposes. Some federal employment or military records might have different documentation dates that could potentially work in your favor. Also, I'd suggest keeping detailed notes of every conversation you have with SSA representatives - date, time, name if possible, and exactly what they tell you. I've heard of situations where different representatives give conflicting information, and having that documentation can be helpful if you need to appeal or clarify anything later. The fact that you were married to the same person for 11 total years really does seem like it should count for something, even if the current rules don't allow it. Good luck with pulling those court records - I'm rooting for you to find some technicality that works in your favor!

I'm a former Social Security field office supervisor and wanted to add something crucial that might apply to your situation. In cases involving remarriage to the same person, we sometimes encountered situations where the original divorce contained specific language about "restoration of marriage" or had conditional elements that weren't fully executed. Some divorce decrees include clauses that essentially suspend the divorce if certain conditions aren't met within a specified timeframe. Additionally, if you reconciled and began living as husband and wife before your remarriage ceremony, some states might recognize that as a continuation of the original marriage under certain circumstances. I'd also suggest checking if there were any appeals filed on your original divorce that might have affected the finalization date. The key is having SSA review the complete legal chronology, not just the surface dates. In my experience, about 15-20% of cases that seemed clear-cut initially had some legal nuance that changed the outcome. Don't let anyone tell you it's hopeless until you've had a thorough review with all documentation by someone who specializes in these complex marriage duration cases.

I'm a family law attorney who has worked on Social Security benefit cases, and I want to strongly encourage you not to give up yet. The advice you've received here about checking the exact legal dates is absolutely critical. I've seen cases where couples believed they had divorced and remarried when legally they never actually completed the first divorce due to procedural issues, missing signatures, or filing errors. Also, pay close attention to whether your state requires a waiting period after filing for divorce before it becomes final - some states have 30, 60, or even 90-day waiting periods. If you reconciled and remarried during that waiting period, you may have had one continuous marriage legally speaking. Additionally, check if your first divorce decree contained any language about "interlocutory" vs "final" decrees - some jurisdictions issue preliminary divorce orders that don't become final until additional steps are completed. I'd also recommend requesting a complete file from the court clerk's office for both divorce proceedings, not just the final decrees. Sometimes there are amended orders, continuances, or other documents that could affect the timeline. Given that you were married 11 years total to the same person, this is definitely worth pursuing thoroughly before accepting that you don't qualify.