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Can I get my ex-spouse's Social Security after a second divorce? Strategic divorce question

I'm trying to figure out a complicated Social Security situation involving multiple marriages. I've been married to my current spouse for 8 years (they're 48, I'm 56). Before this, I was married for 22 years to my ex (who's now 58). I know you can claim ex-spouse benefits if you were married 10+ years, but I'm wondering: if I divorced my current spouse before hitting the 10-year mark, could I still claim benefits based on my first spouse's record? I'm basically trying to calculate if a "strategic divorce" makes financial sense. Also, if I did divorce my current spouse, could I remarry them after I start collecting Social Security based on my first marriage? Or would remarriage cancel those benefits? I know this sounds calculating, but the difference in our ages and earnings histories makes this potentially significant for retirement planning.

AstroAlpha

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Yes, you can claim on your first ex-spouse's record if you were married 10+ years (which you were at 22 years). If you divorce your current spouse before the 10-year mark, you preserve your ability to claim on your first ex's record. However, if you remarry, you generally cannot collect benefits on your first ex's record unless your later marriage ends. The exception is if you remarry after age 60, then you can still collect ex-spousal benefits regardless of remarriage status. So if you divorced now and then remarried after starting benefits AND after turning 60, you could potentially keep those benefits.

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Chloe Davis

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Thank you! So if I understand correctly, I could divorce my current spouse, wait until I'm 60, file for benefits based on my first spouse's record, and THEN remarry my second spouse without losing those benefits? Am I getting that right?

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Diego Chavez

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I went through something similar and the SSA gave me completely wrong information THREE TIMES!!! Every rep told me something different about my ex-spouse benefits. Be VERY careful about making life decisions based on what they tell you. The rules about remarriage are especially confusing and the reps don't always understand them. DOCUMENT EVERYTHING when you call!!

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this happened to my sister too. one person said she could get benefits from her ex, another said no way. turns out the first person was right but she almost gave up because of the confusion

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Sean O'Brien

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There's a lot to consider here beyond just the Social Security benefits. The "strategic divorce" you're contemplating has potential tax implications, impacts on health insurance coverage, effects on property ownership, and possible inheritance complications. Additionally, divorce has legal costs that might offset some of the Social Security gains. I'd strongly recommend consulting with both a financial planner who specializes in retirement planning AND a family law attorney before making this decision. Regarding your specific question, yes, you could technically divorce, claim on your first ex when eligible, and then remarry after 60 without losing those benefits.

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Chloe Davis

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You make excellent points about the broader implications. I do have a financial planner, but they're not very familiar with Social Security nuances. I'll definitely consult with a family law attorney too. The health insurance aspect is particularly important - hadn't fully considered that.

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Zara Shah

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My neighbor did something like this! Divorced her second husband right before 10 years, claimed on her first husband's record (he was a doctor with max earnings), then actually remarried the second guy later. Seemed to work out for her financially but caused family drama with her kids who thought it was manipulative. Just something to consider beyond the dollars and cents...

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Luca Bianchi

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Wow! Did the second husband know that was why she was divorcing him? That seems really calculated. But I guess if they both understood what was happening and were on board... still feels weird though.

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Zara Shah

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Oh yeah, they planned it together! It was all about maximizing their combined retirement income. Still caused issues with adult children though who felt it was gaming the system. But financially it worked great for them.

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I've had to call Social Security multiple times about my own complicated situation with multiple marriages. I wasted HOURS on hold and getting disconnected. Finally found a service called Claimyr (claimyr.com) that got me connected to an actual SSA agent in under 20 minutes. They have a video showing how it works: https://youtu.be/Z-BRbJw3puU. For complicated questions like yours that can't be answered online, getting through to a knowledgeable agent is crucial. I'd definitely recommend speaking directly with SSA about your specific situation.

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Chloe Davis

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Thanks for the tip! I've tried calling a few times and either got disconnected or the person seemed unsure about these specific divorce/remarriage rules. I'll check out that service because I definitely need to speak with someone who really knows these regulations.

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isn't there something about how much u get depends on if ur own benefit is higher than what you'd get from the ex spouse? like u only get the ex spouse benefit if its more than your own? sorry if thats not helpful just remember hearing something like that

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AstroAlpha

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Yes, that's correct. You'll receive whichever is higher - your own benefit or up to 50% of your ex-spouse's full retirement benefit. The SSA automatically gives you whichever amount is larger, but you need to apply specifically for the ex-spouse benefit to trigger that comparison.

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Chloe Davis

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After reading all your helpful responses, I'm wondering about the timing. If my full retirement age is 67, but I could take reduced benefits at 62, when would be the optimal time to execute this plan? Should I divorce before 62, or wait until closer to my full retirement age?

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Sean O'Brien

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The timing question is complex. If you divorce now, you preserve eligibility for your first ex's benefits. You can technically file as early as 62 for reduced benefits or wait until your full retirement age of 67 for 100% of the spousal benefit (which is 50% of your ex's full benefit). If your own benefit would eventually be higher, you might want to take the ex-spousal benefit and then switch to your own later when it maximizes. This strategy depends on birth year though - some of these options were eliminated for people born after 1954. This is precisely why a consultation with an expert is crucial for your situation.

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Luca Bianchi

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Just wanted to say that Social Security rules are so darn complicated! I've been trying to understand them for my own situation and feel like I need a PhD just to figure out when to file. Your question about strategic divorce is actually making me think about my own situation with my ex. Thanks for bringing this up!

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Chloe Davis

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Tell me about it! Every time I think I understand one aspect, I discover five more complications. Glad my question might help your situation too.

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Nia Harris

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I think what you're considering is perfectly rational. The Social Security system has these rules, and planning your life to maximize your benefits is just smart financial planning. My parents divorced after 38 years, and my mom didn't realize until years later that she could claim on my dad's record. She missed out on thousands of dollars because she didn't understand the rules. Being strategic isn't wrong - it's just making informed choices.

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Diego Chavez

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EXACTLY!! The system is DESIGNED with all these weird rules, so why not use them to your advantage? It's not cheating, it's just being smart with the system as it exists. Sorry your mom missed out on those benefits - happens to so many people who don't know their rights!

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AstroAlpha

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One important point to add: even if you claim benefits on your first ex-spouse's record, it does NOT reduce their benefits or impact them in any way. Some people worry about this aspect, but your claim has zero effect on what your ex receives. Also, your ex doesn't need to be receiving benefits yet for you to claim on their record, though they must be eligible for benefits (i.e., be at least 62).

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Chloe Davis

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That's really helpful to know. I was actually concerned about whether this would impact my first ex's benefits. We're on decent terms and I wouldn't want to do anything that reduced what they're entitled to receive.

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