I'm so sorry to hear about this situation with your mother's benefits. This is unfortunately incredibly common - I work as a social worker with seniors and see families discover missed survivor benefits all the time, sometimes years after the fact. A few additional things to consider for your appointment preparation: 1. If your mother has any hearing difficulties or gets overwhelmed easily in official settings, mention this upfront as it could support the "good cause" argument for late filing. 2. Consider bringing a trusted family member or friend as a witness to the appointment - having someone else hear the same information can be helpful if you need to reference the conversation later. 3. Ask specifically about "deemed filing" - sometimes when someone applies for survivor benefits, SSA can treat it as if they applied for all benefits they might be eligible for, which could potentially help with timing. 4. If your father had any periods where he delayed filing for his own Social Security (past his full retirement age), this could actually increase the survivor benefit amount your mother is entitled to, so mention his filing history if you know it. The fact that you're being so proactive and thorough in preparing for this appointment gives me hope that you'll get a positive outcome. Your mother is lucky to have such a dedicated advocate. Wishing you both the best of luck on Tuesday!

I'm a retired SSA employee and wanted to add something that might help with your Tuesday appointment. When you establish that protective filing date tomorrow, ask the representative to make a notation in your mother's record about the specific circumstances - that she was never informed about survivor benefits and continued receiving only her own benefit for three years. Also, bring documentation of your mother's current monthly expenses if you have it (utility bills, medical costs, etc.). While not required, showing the financial hardship caused by the delayed benefits can sometimes help with good cause determinations. One thing many people don't know is that survivor benefits can sometimes be higher than 100% of the deceased spouse's benefit if the deceased spouse had delayed retirement credits. Since your father was working past full retirement age, this could mean your mother is entitled to even more than his $2,850 monthly amount. Don't get discouraged if the first person you speak with seems unsure about the good cause provisions - ask to speak with a claims specialist or supervisor. The rules around late filing exceptions can be complex, and not all front-line staff are familiar with every provision. Your thorough preparation and advocacy will make a huge difference. Good luck on Tuesday!

I just wanted to thank everyone who contributed to this discussion - the information shared here is incredibly valuable! As someone who's been navigating Social Security planning for my own family, I can attest to how confusing these rules can be, especially when dealing with divorced spouse benefits. One additional resource that might be helpful is the SSA's Publication 05-10084 "Benefits For Your Divorced Spouse" which explains these rules in detail. You can find it on their website under publications. Also, many local libraries have AARP tax preparation volunteers during tax season who are often well-versed in Social Security questions and can provide free guidance. The strategy discussed here really highlights the importance of understanding all your options before making claiming decisions. It's great to see a community where people share real experiences and practical advice!

This has been such an informative discussion! I'm actually a Social Security representative (though I can't provide official advice here), and I'm impressed by how accurate most of the information shared has been. A few things I'd emphasize for anyone in similar situations: 1. The 10-year marriage requirement is key - you mentioned 25 years, so you're well covered there. 2. Your strategy of waiting until 70 is smart since it maximizes your own benefit with delayed retirement credits. 3. When the time comes to apply for survivor benefits, don't rely solely on phone calls - consider scheduling an in-person appointment at your local SSA office for something this important. 4. Keep in mind that survivor benefits can be claimed as early as age 60 (or 50 if disabled), but waiting until your FRA gives you 100% of the benefit. Your plan is sound, and it's great to see so many people helping each other understand these complex rules. The peace of mind alone of having a backup plan is valuable!

Congratulations on getting through and getting approved! That's a significant monthly benefit that will definitely help with raising your daughter. Just wanted to add a couple of things others haven't mentioned: 1) If your situation changes and you and your husband legally separate or divorce, you may still be eligible for divorced spouse benefits later when you turn 62 (as long as your marriage lasted at least 10 years, which yours has). 2) Keep good records of all the paperwork you submit to SSA. Sometimes documents get lost in their system and having copies can save you time if you need to resubmit anything. 3) The benefits should be retroactive to when you first became eligible (likely when your daughter started receiving benefits), so you might get a lump sum back payment. It's really encouraging to see someone navigate the SSA system successfully and get the help they're entitled to. Your story will definitely help other parents in similar situations!

This thread has been so helpful! I'm in a somewhat similar situation - my ex-husband is collecting disability benefits and our 12-year-old receives benefits on his record. I'm 45 and have primary custody. I had no idea I might be eligible for mother's benefits too. The information about it not mattering that we're divorced (as long as I'm caring for the child) is news to me. Gabriel, thank you for asking this question and sharing your successful outcome - it's given me hope that I can navigate this process too. The tip about Claimyr.com might be a lifesaver since I've also had terrible luck getting through to SSA by phone. Going to look into applying for these benefits this week!

As a newcomer here, I wanted to share something that might be helpful based on my recent experience helping my mother navigate Social Security. One thing we discovered is that you can actually request a personalized survivor benefit estimate directly from SSA by calling or visiting in person. They can run the exact calculations based on your current earnings record and projected benefit amount. This gave us much more accurate numbers than the online estimators. Also, I'd suggest documenting not just your benefit statements, but also any conversations you have with SSA agents - get names, dates, and case numbers if they assign one. My mom had conflicting information from different agents, and having those details helped resolve the discrepancy. Finally, consider setting up automatic notifications in your MySocialSecurity account so both you and your wife get alerts about any changes to your benefits or earnings record. It's a small step but can help catch issues early.

As a newcomer to this community, I wanted to add something that might be useful for your planning. I recently went through Social Security benefit planning with my spouse, and one thing our financial advisor emphasized was the importance of understanding the "do-over" rules. If you change your mind within 12 months of starting benefits, you can withdraw your application and repay what you've received (without interest) to essentially reset and claim later at a higher amount. This could be relevant if you start claiming at your FRA but then realize waiting until 70 would significantly benefit your wife's future survivor benefits. Also, make sure you both understand that survivor benefits aren't just about monthly payments - your wife would also become eligible for any Medicare benefits you're receiving, and she'd retain the higher benefit for life (unless she remarries before age 60). The peace of mind from having this all documented and understood ahead of time is really invaluable.

This is such valuable information! I'm 61 and in a similar situation - divorced after 15 years, ex-spouse passed away 8 years ago. I've been wondering about this exact strategy but wasn't sure if it was allowed. Reading through all these responses has been incredibly helpful. I especially appreciate the tips about using specific terminology like "restricted application for survivor benefits only" and the reminder about gathering all the necessary documents early. One question I have - has anyone here actually gone through this process recently? I'm curious about how long it takes from application to receiving the first benefit payment. Also, does SSA automatically send you reminders when you're approaching 70 to switch to your own benefits, or is it really up to you to remember and initiate that change?

I'm 58 and recently widowed after being divorced from my ex-husband for 6 years. We were married for 14 years before the divorce. Reading through this thread has given me hope that I might have some options when I get older! I had no idea that divorced spouses could be eligible for survivor benefits. Does anyone know if there are any special considerations for people who become widows/widowers closer to age 60? I'm wondering if I should start gathering documents now or if there are other benefits I might be eligible for sooner than the full retirement age strategy discussed here. Also, is there a difference between being a "surviving divorced spouse" versus a regular surviving spouse in terms of benefit amounts? This is all so overwhelming but everyone's shared experiences here are really helping me understand what might be possible.