I can definitely relate to your anxiety about this! I had my SSA interview about 8 months ago and they asked me similar questions about my ex-husband, including details about his siblings and even what street we lived on 18 years ago. I was so embarrassed that I couldn't remember most of it, especially since the agent kept pressing me for more details. But here's what helped calm my nerves - I called the SSA office a few weeks later to check on my application status, and the representative I spoke with actually explained that these verification questions are completely routine. She told me they ask them for every applicant with previous marriages because they need to document relationship history for their records, but they don't expect perfect memory recall. My benefits were approved without any issues, even though I probably answered "I don't remember" to at least half their questions about my ex. The key thing that worked in my favor (and yours too) was being completely honest about what I didn't know rather than trying to guess or make something up. Since you have your divorce decree and remembered the important stuff like your marriage date, you should be fine. Try not to stress too much - you handled it exactly right by being truthful!

I'm going through my SSA application process right now and this thread has been incredibly helpful! I've been dreading my interview because I know they're going to ask about my ex-husband from 14 years ago, and honestly I can barely remember what I had for breakfast yesterday, let alone specific details about someone I haven't spoken to in over a decade. Reading all these experiences where people forgot similar details but still got approved is really reassuring. It sounds like the key takeaway is to be honest about what you don't remember rather than guessing, and to have whatever documentation you can find (like divorce decrees). @Dyllan, I think you handled your interview perfectly by being truthful. The fact that so many people here have shared nearly identical experiences with successful outcomes should definitely put your mind at ease. Thanks to everyone for sharing - this is exactly the kind of real-world insight that's impossible to find in official SSA guides!

Just to add one more technical detail - the DRC rate is 2/3 of 1% per month, which works out to 8% per year for each full year you delay. So in the original poster's case, if they suspend from age 68 to 70, they'd get approximately 16% increase from the DRCs earned during suspension (plus any COLAs that occur during that period). Also important: while benefits are suspended, any benefits payable to others on your record (like spousal benefits) are also suspended, except for divorced spouse benefits. Make sure that doesn't impact your situation.

I'm so glad you posted this question because I was literally in the exact same boat last month! I started my benefits at 67.5, collected for about 6 months, then decided to suspend to maximize my lifetime benefits. The first rep I spoke with was super knowledgeable and walked me through the whole process, explaining how I'd earn DRCs during suspension. But then I called back a few weeks later with a question and got a completely different story from another rep who seemed to think suspension and withdrawal were the same thing. What really helped me was going to my local SSA office in person with printed pages from ssa.gov showing the official policy on voluntary suspension after FRA. The local office staff seemed much more knowledgeable than the phone reps, and they were able to pull up my record and confirm everything was processed correctly as a voluntary suspension (not administrative). One tip: when you call, specifically use the phrase "voluntary suspension after Full Retirement Age to earn Delayed Retirement Credits" - this seems to help the reps understand exactly what you're talking about. And definitely get that written confirmation! You did nothing wrong, and you'll absolutely get those DRCs when you restart at 70.

I went through this exact situation with my employer's car allowance program about 6 months ago. Here's what I learned after consulting with both my tax preparer and calling SSA directly: if your employer reports it in Box 1 of your W-2 (which they almost certainly will for a flat $750/month allowance), then SSA will count it toward the earnings test regardless of what your HR department calls it. The only way around this is if they can restructure it as a true accountable plan where you submit actual receipts and only get reimbursed for documented expenses. I ended up having to decline the allowance because it would have pushed me over the limit by about $3,000, which would have cost me $1,500 in reduced benefits. My advice is to get clarity from HR about whether they can switch to a receipt-based reimbursement system, and if not, do the math to see if it's still worth it financially given the benefit reduction formula.

I work for a benefits consulting firm and deal with these situations frequently. The distinction everyone is making between allowances and reimbursements is absolutely correct, but I wanted to add one more consideration: timing. If you do end up going over the earnings limit, SSA typically doesn't catch it until they get your W-2 information the following year. This means you could potentially receive a full year of benefits and then face a large overpayment demand later. Given that you're only 64, you have several more years before FRA where this could be an ongoing issue. I'd strongly recommend either getting that accountable plan structure in place or declining the allowance altogether. The peace of mind is worth more than the hassle of dealing with SSA overpayment collections, which can be a nightmare to resolve.

Thanks everyone for the helpful information! I'm definitely going to go ahead with applying for spousal benefits after we get married. Just to make sure I understand correctly: I'll continue to receive my current benefit plus the difference to make it up to 50% of his benefit, and there's no waiting period to apply once we're married. I'll make sure to bring our marriage certificate to the SSA office. And I appreciate the reminder about survivor benefits too - that gives me peace of mind for the future.

Just wanted to add one more practical tip - when you go to the SSA office to apply for spousal benefits, I'd recommend calling ahead to make an appointment rather than just walking in. The wait times can be really long without an appointment, especially at the beginning of the month when a lot of people are dealing with benefit issues. Also, bring a copy of your marriage certificate in addition to the original, as they sometimes like to keep a copy for their records. The whole process should be pretty straightforward since you're already in their system receiving your own benefits. Good luck with your wedding and the benefit increase!

Reading through all these responses, I'm struck by how much helpful information everyone has shared! As someone who recently went through the Social Security application process myself, I wanted to add one more perspective that might be useful. The decision to take benefits at 62 when you're in a caregiving situation like yours is really about quality of life, not just finances. Yes, you'll have a permanent reduction in benefits, but you'll also have 5 years of payments that you wouldn't get if you waited until full retirement age. Over time, it often works out to be a reasonable trade-off, especially when you factor in the reduced stress of having steady income during such a demanding period. I also wanted to mention that once you're receiving Social Security, you'll automatically be enrolled in Medicare when you turn 65, which can simplify that process during what will likely still be a busy caregiving period. Your situation with caring for your mom with dementia while helping with grandchildren is incredibly challenging. The fact that you're planning ahead and asking the right questions shows you're handling this with real wisdom. The extra income from spousal benefits will give you options and flexibility that you wouldn't have otherwise. That peace of mind is worth a lot when you're juggling so many responsibilities. Best of luck with your application in September - it sounds like you have a solid plan and a great community here to support you!

I've been following this entire discussion and I'm so impressed by how supportive this community has been! Ava, your situation really touched my heart - I went through something very similar with my own mother a few years ago. One small detail I haven't seen mentioned yet: when you apply in September, you might want to ask about having your benefits start in January rather than December (your birth month). Sometimes there can be slight timing advantages depending on when exactly in December your birthday falls, and starting benefits in January might make tax filing a bit simpler for 2025. Also, since you mentioned retail work and knee problems, you might want to look into whether your state has any disability tax credits or property tax relief programs for people transitioning from work to Social Security due to health issues. Every little bit helps when you're managing a tight budget. You've gotten such excellent advice here, and your plan to apply in September sounds perfect. The fact that you'll be able to focus on your family's care without the constant worry about finances will benefit everyone - your mom, your grandchildren, and especially you. Take care of yourself too during this transition!