I went through this exact situation about 3 years ago! My ex-husband was on SSDI and I applied for divorced spouse benefits at 62. Here's what I learned that might help you: First, yes you absolutely can get benefits based on his SSDI record since you were married over 10 years and haven't remarried. The amount will be based on his Primary Insurance Amount (the same number his SSDI is calculated from), so you're not penalized because it's disability vs retirement. However, filing at 62 means you'll get about 32.5% of his PIA instead of the full 50% you'd get at your full retirement age. In my case, this ended up being around $850/month. Also, make sure to apply online or by phone rather than going to the office - the online application lets you provide all your info upfront and seemed to process faster. They'll need your marriage certificate, divorce decree, and his Social Security number. The whole process took about 6 weeks for me. One last tip: if you're still working, definitely factor in the earnings test that others mentioned. I had to reduce my hours because I was losing $1 in benefits for every $2 I earned over the limit. Good luck!

I'm in a very similar situation - my ex-husband has been on SSDI for about 3 years and I'm approaching 62 next year. Reading through all these responses has been incredibly helpful! One thing I wanted to add based on my research is that you should also consider whether waiting until your full retirement age (probably 66 or 67) would be worth it financially. I know everyone's situation is different, but I've been running some calculations and for me, waiting those extra 4-5 years to get the full 50% instead of the reduced amount at 62 might actually be better in the long run, especially if I can keep working part-time. The break-even point seems to be around age 78-80 depending on the benefit amounts. Of course, that assumes you can afford to wait and don't need the income right away. I'm still torn about what to do myself! Has anyone else wrestled with the decision of taking reduced benefits early versus waiting for the full amount?

I'm going through something very similar with my 24-year-old daughter who has intellectual disabilities. We were stuck at around $615/month for the longest time until I finally figured out we weren't calculating her share correctly. One thing that really helped us was creating a separate checking account specifically for her household expense payments. This made it crystal clear to SSA exactly what money was being used for what purpose, and eliminated any confusion about whether she was actually paying these expenses or just moving money around. Also, don't forget about things like trash/recycling service, basic cable/internet, and even pest control if you have it - these all count as legitimate household operating expenses that should be included in your calculations. The process is definitely frustrating, but once you get it right, the difference in monthly income is life-changing. My daughter went from $615 to the full $943, which gave her so much more independence and dignity. Keep pushing for what your son deserves - you're being an amazing advocate for him!

I'm so grateful I found this thread! My 28-year-old son with autism is in almost the exact same situation - getting around $580/month instead of the full SSI amount. Reading through all these detailed responses has been like getting a masterclass in SSI benefits that I never knew I needed. What really struck me is how many families are dealing with this same issue, and how the SSA representatives seem to give such vague or inconsistent information about the requirements. It's incredibly frustrating when you're trying to do right by your adult child and the system seems designed to be confusing. I'm going to start implementing several of the strategies mentioned here: 1. Create that detailed spreadsheet tracking ALL household expenses 2. Set up the separate checking account for his household payments 3. Use specific memo lines like "pro-rata household expenses per SSA guidelines" 4. Request the PMV determination in writing The success stories shared here give me so much hope. Knowing that other families have navigated this maze and gotten their loved ones the full benefits they deserve makes me feel like this is actually achievable. Thank you to everyone who took the time to share their experiences and advice - this community is truly amazing for supporting each other through these bureaucratic challenges!

I'm going through something similar right now! My situation is a bit different though - I estimated $20,000 for 2024 but ended up earning closer to $17,500 because I had to reduce my hours for health reasons. They've been withholding about $200 per month from my benefits. From what I'm reading here, it sounds like the automatic adjustment should happen, but there might be delays or issues. I'm definitely going to check my online SSA account regularly starting this summer to see if there's any indication of an adjustment coming. @StarStrider - I hope you get your $360 back soon! It's frustrating when you're already dealing with reduced income and then have to worry about whether the government systems are working properly. Keep us posted on how it goes!

I just went through this process last year and wanted to share my experience to maybe help ease some worries. The SSA did automatically process my refund, but it took longer than expected - about 7 months after I filed my taxes. Like you, I had estimated higher earnings than what I actually made (estimated $22k, earned $18.5k), and they had withheld about $500 too much. The refund came as a separate lump sum payment in October with a letter explaining it was an "earnings test adjustment." One tip: when you check your my Social Security account online, look for any notices or messages about "annual earnings test" - that's usually where they'll post updates about pending adjustments. If you don't see anything by September, I'd definitely recommend calling or visiting an office. The wait was stressful, but the money did eventually come through!

I'm so sorry you're going through this - I know exactly how overwhelming it feels! I was laid off at 64 just 8 months ago and successfully navigated this same maze of decisions. Here's what worked for me and what I wish I'd known upfront: **Apply for unemployment immediately** - You're entitled to this and it provides crucial breathing room. Don't worry about the severance timing - it won't affect your unemployment eligibility in most states, though they may ask about it. **Severance won't hurt your SS benefits** - This was my biggest worry, but severance is a one-time payment that doesn't count toward the earnings test. Only ongoing wages from actual work count toward that $21,240 annual limit. **Use unemployment as a bridge** - This was the game-changer for me. Instead of rushing into SS filing, I used my 26 weeks of unemployment to let my SS benefit grow. At your age, each month you delay filing increases your benefit by about 0.5-0.7% - permanently! Over 6 months, that's a meaningful increase for the rest of your life. **The spousal benefit consideration is crucial** - Since your husband is younger and likely higher-earning, be very careful about the deemed filing rules. Once you claim your own benefit, you're locked into that decision even for future spousal benefits. **State-specific rules matter** - Most states allow you to collect both unemployment and SS simultaneously, but double-check your state's specific policies. My suggestion: File for unemployment now, then spend the next few months using the SSA calculator to model different claiming scenarios. You have time to make this decision thoughtfully rather than under pressure. You've got this! The initial panic is totally normal, but once you take that first step with unemployment, everything else becomes much clearer.

I'm so sorry you're dealing with this situation - being laid off at 64 is incredibly stressful, and trying to coordinate all these different benefit systems can feel overwhelming. I went through something very similar when I was unexpectedly laid off at 63. Here's what I learned from my experience: **Start with unemployment immediately** - You're entitled to these benefits and they provide crucial income while you sort out the bigger decisions. Don't stress about the severance timing affecting this. **Your severance won't impact SS benefits** - This was one of my biggest concerns, but severance is considered a one-time payment that doesn't count toward the Social Security earnings test. Only ongoing wages from actual work count toward that $21,240 limit for 2025. **Consider using unemployment as a strategic bridge** - Instead of rushing to file for SS, you could use your unemployment benefits (typically 26 weeks) to delay your SS filing by several months. Each month you wait increases your benefit amount permanently - at your age, that's roughly 0.5-0.7% per month. Over 6 months, that adds up to meaningful money for the rest of your life. **Be very careful about spousal benefits** - Since your husband is younger and has historically earned more, you'll want to understand how the "deemed filing" rules might affect your future spousal benefit options before you claim your own retirement benefit. The most important thing is that you don't have to decide everything at once. Filing for unemployment first gives you breathing room to research your SS options thoroughly using their online calculator. You're going to get through this! Take it one step at a time.

This is such valuable information for grandparents! I wanted to add something that might help - if you're concerned about proving the parents aren't providing support (like Sofia mentioned), you can also ask SSA about getting a "Statement of Non-Support" form. This is something the absent parents can sign (if you can locate them) or you can provide an affidavit explaining their absence and lack of contact. I learned this when helping my neighbor with a similar situation. Also, keep records of ANY expenses you pay for your grandson - school supplies, clothes, activities, even small things add up and show the pattern of you being the primary provider. The more documentation you have, the stronger your case will be.

As someone new to this community, I just wanted to say how incredibly helpful this entire thread has been! I'm in a very similar situation - I've had custody of my 8-year-old nephew for the past 4 years after his parents lost their rights due to substance abuse issues. Reading through Sofia's journey and everyone's advice has given me so much hope and direction for planning our future when I retire in a few years. The practical tips about documentation, the health insurance angle, and especially learning about the Statement of Non-Support form are game-changers. It's reassuring to know that SSA does recognize these family situations where grandparents and other relatives step up to raise children. Thank you all for sharing your experiences so openly - it makes navigating this complex system feel much less overwhelming for those of us just starting to research our options.