Thank you all for the helpful information! It seems clear that my ex-wife has no claim to benefits on my record as long as she remains married. That's a relief to know. My current wife and I are satisfied with our benefit decisions, even though she's receiving a reduced amount by claiming early. One follow-up question - if my ex-wife's current marriage ends and she then claims on my record when she's eligible, would I be notified by SSA? Or would that happen without my knowledge?

Just wanted to add some clarity on the timing aspects since I see some questions about this. Your ex-wife would need to wait until she's at least 62 to claim any ex-spouse benefits (assuming she becomes eligible by being unmarried at that time). Since she's currently 55, that's still 7 years away. Also, regarding notification - you're correct that SSA won't notify you if she ever does file. This is standard practice to protect privacy. The system is designed so that ex-spouse claims are completely separate from your benefits and don't require any input or awareness from you. One small correction to an earlier comment - the 10-year marriage requirement is measured from the date of marriage to the date the divorce was finalized, not just separated. Since you mentioned 19 years of marriage, that requirement is definitely met if the situation ever changes.

I've been following this discussion and wanted to share some additional resources that might help everyone here. For those struggling to get through to SSA by phone, you can also visit your local Social Security office in person - sometimes it's faster than waiting on hold for hours. You can find your nearest office at ssa.gov/locator. I'd recommend calling ahead to see if they require appointments, as some offices have shifted to appointment-only since COVID. Also, if you're trying to get benefit estimates, the online "my Social Security" account at ssa.gov is really helpful for seeing your own projected benefits, though as others mentioned, it won't show you what you might be eligible for from an ex-spouse's record. One more tip: if you do end up calling SSA, try calling right when they open at 7 AM local time - the wait times are usually much shorter in the morning. I've had good luck getting through within 15-20 minutes that way versus hours during peak times. The remarriage timing decisions you're all discussing are so important financially - it's worth the effort to get the official numbers to make informed choices!

This has been such an informative discussion! I'm 62 and went through this exact decision process 3 years ago. I was divorced after 14 years of marriage and had been with my current partner for 5 years when I had to decide about remarriage timing. I ended up waiting until after my 60th birthday to remarry, and I'm so glad I did. My ex-husband had significantly higher earnings than both myself and my new husband, so preserving the option to claim on his record was financially crucial. When I applied for benefits last year, I was able to choose the highest of the three options available to me. One thing I wish someone had told me earlier: even though everyone talks about the "age 60 rule," the actual claiming decision doesn't happen until you're 62+ anyway, so you have time after remarriage to really crunch the numbers and see which benefit source gives you the most money. For those of you still deciding on timing - it's worth doing the math with actual benefit estimates rather than guessing. The difference in my case was about $400/month between my ex's record versus my new husband's record, which adds up to almost $5,000 per year. Waiting two extra years to remarry was definitely worth it for that kind of financial security. Best of luck to everyone navigating these decisions!

I'm going through almost this exact same situation right now! Created my MySocialSecurity account about a year ago, forgot all my login details, and have been putting off dealing with it. Reading through all these experiences has been incredibly helpful and reassuring. The overwhelming consensus around trying ID.me verification first is really convincing - so many success stories with quick turnaround times. I especially appreciate the practical tips about lighting for the selfie and making sure to wear/not wear glasses to match your ID photo. One question for those who used ID.me successfully - did you have to remember any information from your original account setup, or does the verification rely entirely on matching your current government ID? I'm worried I might get stuck if they ask for details I've completely forgotten from when I first created the account. Also want to echo the thanks to Dmitry from the SSA office for taking time to share official guidance - knowing that walk-ins are seeing 3-4 hour waits definitely makes the online recovery options much more appealing! Going to try the ID.me route this weekend when I have good natural lighting.

I'm new to this community but wanted to share my experience since I just went through this exact situation last month! I had a MySocialSecurity account from about 2 years ago that I completely forgot how to access - couldn't remember my username, password, or security question answers. I was really dreading the recovery process after hearing horror stories about long wait times and complicated procedures. After reading through similar discussions, I decided to try the ID.me verification route that many people recommended, and I'm so glad I did! The entire process took less than 15 minutes. Here's what made it work smoothly for me: 1) Made sure I had excellent lighting (near a window during daytime) 2) Had my current driver's license ready 3) Wore my glasses since that's how I appear in my license photo 4) Made sure my phone camera was clean for a clear selfie The ID.me system was much more intuitive than I expected. It walks you through each step clearly, and the identity verification happens in real-time. Once verified, I was immediately back into my MySocialSecurity account and could update all my contact information. One thing I learned: definitely don't try to create a new account if you already have one - I've heard that can trigger fraud alerts and cause major delays. The account recovery route is definitely the way to go. For anyone facing this same situation, I'd highly recommend trying the ID.me verification first before calling or visiting an office. Based on my experience and what others have shared, it has a very high success rate and saves a lot of time and frustration. Good luck!

Hi everyone! As a newcomer to this community, I've been following this discussion with great interest since my parents are in a very similar situation to Omar's. They're 64 and 66 respectively, and we've been trying to help them figure out their Social Security strategy. What I find most valuable about this thread is how it demonstrates the importance of looking at Social Security as a household strategy rather than individual decisions. The interplay between spousal benefits, survivor benefits, and timing really requires considering both spouses' situations together. One thing I haven't seen mentioned yet is the tax implications of these decisions. Depending on your other retirement income sources, Social Security benefits can become taxable at different thresholds. If Omar and his wife have significant 401k or pension income, the timing of when his wife claims could affect their overall tax burden in retirement. Also, for anyone dealing with these complex scenarios, I'd recommend checking if your state has a SHINE (Serving Health Information Needs of Everyone) program or similar counseling service. These are usually free programs that help with Medicare and Social Security questions, and they often have counselors who really understand the nuances of spousal benefit strategies. Omar, it sounds like you've received excellent advice here about waiting until your wife's FRA. The combination of maximizing the spousal benefit amount plus getting COLAs applied to that higher base really does seem to make the patience worthwhile if you can manage financially. Thank you to everyone who has shared their knowledge and experiences - this community is providing such valuable real-world guidance that you just can't get from generic online calculators!

Hi everyone! I'm new to this community and have been reading through this fascinating discussion about spousal Social Security benefits. As someone just starting to learn about these strategies, this thread has been incredibly educational. What really impressed me is how the community has broken down such a complex topic into understandable pieces. The explanation about deemed filing rules and how the old "restricted application" strategy is no longer available was particularly helpful - I had been reading outdated information elsewhere that was quite confusing. Omar, your situation really highlights how important it is to run the actual numbers rather than relying on general rules of thumb. The break-even analysis discussion between you and CosmicCadet was so clear, and Diego's points about actuarial neutrality helped me understand the underlying logic of the system. I'm also grateful for all the practical resources people have shared - from the SSA publication Sean mentioned to the SHINE programs that Ahooker-Equator brought up. As a newcomer trying to prepare for similar decisions with my own family, having a roadmap of reliable resources is invaluable. One thing that strikes me is how these decisions really can't be made in isolation - the spousal benefits, survivor benefits, tax implications, and even health insurance considerations during the gap years all interconnect in complex ways. It's clear that professional guidance or at least thorough research using multiple sources is essential. Thank you to everyone who has contributed their knowledge and experiences to this discussion. This community provides such valuable real-world insights that go far beyond what you can find in generic online articles!

I'm so deeply sorry for your loss, Connor. Losing a spouse is incredibly heartbreaking, and having to navigate all these bureaucratic processes while you're still grieving must feel absolutely overwhelming. Reading through all the excellent advice here, I wanted to add something that helped me when my mother went through this process after my father passed: consider asking the SSA representative to provide you with a written summary of your different benefit options and their respective amounts before you leave your appointment. Sometimes they'll give you a printout showing various scenarios (survivor benefits at different ages, your own retirement benefits, etc.) which can be invaluable for making informed decisions later when you're not feeling so overwhelmed. Also, I'd suggest bringing a trusted friend or family member with you if possible - not just for emotional support, but to serve as a second set of ears. When you're processing grief and complex financial information simultaneously, it's easy to miss important details. One practical tip: wear comfortable shoes and dress in layers. SSA offices can have long waits and unpredictable temperatures, and being physically comfortable helps you focus on the important information they're sharing. You're showing incredible strength by taking these steps to secure your financial future during such a difficult time. This community is here for you, and please don't hesitate to come back with updates on how your appointment goes or if you need any other support along the way. Take care of yourself - you're handling more than anyone should have to while grieving.

Connor, I'm so sorry for your loss. Losing a spouse is devastating, and I can only imagine how overwhelming it must feel to navigate all these administrative tasks while you're still grieving. I went through this same process when my wife passed away about 14 months ago. The advice everyone has shared here is excellent - you definitely cannot access his online MySocialSecurity account, and you'll need to apply for survivor benefits through SSA directly. One thing I haven't seen mentioned yet that really helped me: when you're gathering all those documents (death certificate, marriage certificate, etc.), make sure to get them organized in chronological order. The SSA representative will likely review your marriage history and his work history in sequence, so having everything arranged that way makes the appointment flow much more smoothly. Also, since you mentioned feeling overwhelmed with paperwork in general, you might want to consider reaching out to a local senior services organization or even your county's aging and disability services office. Many of them offer free assistance with Social Security applications and can sometimes provide an advocate to accompany you to your appointment. The financial and timing strategies others have mentioned (like restricted applications and survivor benefit timing) are really important at your age, so definitely ask for specific dollar amounts for each scenario. You're smart to gather all this information beforehand. Please take care of yourself during this difficult process. This community has been such a source of support for me during my own journey, and we're all here for you too.