I work as a paralegal for a family law firm and we handle these cases frequently. One thing that hasn't been mentioned yet is timing - auxiliary benefits can be retroactive to when your ex first became eligible for SSDI, which could mean a lump sum payment for your son. Also, make sure to ask about cost of living adjustments (COLAs) when you call SSA - auxiliary benefits increase automatically each year, but child support orders often need to be modified separately to account for these increases. Document everything during this process because if there are calculation errors, it can take months to sort out. Your state's child support calculator should have specific worksheets for SSDI/VA benefit situations - request to see exactly how they're computing the numbers.

I went through this exact situation about 3 years ago and it was incredibly confusing at first. Here's what I learned that might help you: First, get clarification on whether your son is eligible for auxiliary benefits on your ex's SSDI record - this is separate from his own SSDI benefits. When my ex transitioned to SSDI, my daughter became eligible for auxiliary benefits that we hadn't even known existed. These benefits are paid directly to you as representative payee but count toward his child support obligation. Second, regarding VA benefits, most states exclude a significant portion (usually 40-60%) of VA disability compensation from income calculations because it's meant to compensate for service-connected disabilities, not regular income. However, they typically include 100% of SSDI in income calculations. The reason your child support office is saying his obligation might decrease is likely because they're anticipating auxiliary benefits will replace part of the direct payment - but the total support amount should remain similar or even increase slightly. I'd strongly recommend requesting a detailed worksheet showing exactly how they're calculating with both benefit types. Also, apply for those auxiliary benefits immediately if your son is eligible - they can be retroactive and could result in back payments. The whole process took about 4 months to sort out completely, but once everything was in place, it actually worked out better financially than before.

I'm so sorry for your loss, Connor. Losing a spouse is incredibly difficult, and having to navigate Social Security while grieving makes it even more overwhelming. You've received some fantastic advice here from people who've actually been through this process. The key insight about your pension not counting toward the earnings test really does change everything - with only your $15K part-time income affecting the calculation, you're in a much better position than you initially thought. I wanted to add one practical tip from my own experience dealing with government benefits: when you do get through to SSA (whether via Claimyr or the local office), have a written list of questions ready and take notes during the call. Ask for the representative's name and ID number, and request they email or mail you a summary of what was discussed. This has saved me so much frustration in follow-up calls when different representatives give conflicting information. Also, since you mentioned being a teacher, you might want to check if your state or local teacher's union has any resources or advocates who are familiar with Social Security survivor benefits. Sometimes they have specialists who can help navigate these complex situations. The strategy you're considering - survivor benefits at 60, then switching to your own higher benefit at FRA - is exactly what financial planners recommend for situations like yours. You're making smart decisions during an incredibly difficult time. Take care of yourself through this process!

Connor, my heart goes out to you during this incredibly difficult time. Losing a spouse is devastating, and trying to navigate these complex Social Security rules while grieving just adds another layer of stress. I've been following this thread and am amazed by the quality of advice you've received from this community. The discovery that only your $15K part-time income (not your pension) counts toward the earnings test is absolutely game-changing for your situation. That transforms what seemed like an impossible financial puzzle into a very manageable strategy. As someone who went through a similar survivor benefits decision three years ago, I want to emphasize how important it is to trust the process you're developing here. The approach of taking survivor benefits at 60 and switching to your own higher benefit at FRA isn't just smart - it's exactly what grief counselors and financial planners recommend for widows with higher earning records. One small addition to all the excellent advice: when you do connect with SSA, ask them to walk through a year-by-year projection of your benefits under different scenarios. Sometimes seeing the actual numbers laid out helps clarify whether small adjustments (like reducing part-time hours) would meaningfully impact your total benefits received. You're handling this with such grace and thoroughness. Your husband would be proud of how carefully you're securing your financial future while honoring the benefits he helped earn for both of you.

forgot to say - when my mom was in ur situation she got the $255 death benefit right away but had to wait on the monthly survivor checks until she cut back her hours at work. once she went part time she started getting a small amount each month.

I'm so sorry for your loss, AstroAce. Going through this while grieving is incredibly difficult. Based on what others have shared, it sounds like you have some important decisions to make about timing. Given that you're earning significantly more than the $23,920 limit and plan to work 2-5 more years, you might want to ask SSA during your appointment about the pros and cons of waiting to apply. As StarStrider mentioned, applying now would lock in the 71.5% rate permanently, even if you receive $0 due to earnings. However, if you wait until closer to your FRA to apply for survivor benefits, you'd get a higher percentage. And since your own earnings history sounds strong, your personal retirement benefit at 70 might exceed the survivor benefit anyway. Key questions for your SSA appointment: - What would your survivor benefit be at different claiming ages? - What's your projected retirement benefit at 62, FRA, and 70? - Would a "claim survivor benefits later, switch to own benefit at 70" strategy work better? - If you reduce hours in 1-2 years, how would that affect your options? Document everything they tell you and get their employee ID. You're asking all the right questions - don't let them rush you into a decision during that call.

Thank you all SO MUCH for your helpful responses! Based on everything you've shared, I'm going to hold off on claiming any benefits until at least my FRA. It just doesn't make financial sense to claim early with: - The earnings test that would withhold most benefits - Permanent reduction for early claiming - Deemed filing requirements - Tax implications I'm going to look more closely at my own earnings record and see what my benefit would be at 67 versus my husband's spousal benefit amount. Really appreciate all the knowledge and experience shared here!

You made a really smart decision! I went through a similar situation a few years ago and ended up waiting until my FRA - best choice I ever made. One additional tip: since your husband is filing at his FRA in December, make sure you understand exactly what his Primary Insurance Amount (PIA) will be. Your spousal benefit will be 50% of that amount when you file at your FRA. Also, don't forget that your own benefit continues to grow with delayed retirement credits if you wait past your FRA until age 70 (8% per year). So you might want to run the numbers on whether it makes sense to take spousal at 67 or wait even longer for your own enhanced benefit. The Social Security Administration has some good calculators on their website that can help you model different scenarios. Good luck with your planning!

Based on everything shared here, it sounds like applying for retirement benefits while your SSDI is pending is definitely the right move for your situation. I went through something similar with my knee problems - couldn't work, bills piling up, and the disability process dragging on forever. Taking early retirement at least gave me some income to survive on while waiting. The key things I learned: 1) Make sure to explicitly tell SSA you want BOTH claims processed, 2) Keep detailed records of all communications, and 3) Don't worry about the early retirement "penalty" because if disability gets approved, they'll adjust everything retroactively. The peace of mind from having some money coming in is worth it. Hang in there - the waiting is the hardest part but you're making the smart choice by not letting yourself go broke while fighting for what you deserve.

Welcome everyone who's joined this discussion recently! As someone who's been navigating the SSA system for a while, I wanted to add a few practical tips that might help: 1) When you call SSA or visit an office, always ask for a "receipt" or confirmation of what was discussed - they can provide a summary letter that documents your conversation 2) Consider setting up a my Social Security account online (ssa.gov) if you haven't already - you can track both applications and see updates without having to call 3) If you do decide to file for both, bring documentation of your pending SSDI case (claim number, dates, etc.) when you apply for retirement benefits The most important thing I've learned is that this process requires patience but also persistence. Don't let anyone discourage you from pursuing what you're entitled to. The concurrent filing strategy has worked well for many people in this community, and it sounds like it could be a lifeline for those of you dealing with financial stress while waiting for disability decisions. Keep advocating for yourselves - you know your situations best!