These clowns made me verify TWICE because they lost my first verification 🤡 Make sure you get proof that you completed it!

Been through this twice unfortunately. First time I didn't bring all the right documents and had to come back. Make sure you have: original Social Security card (not a copy!), valid government-issued photo ID, and the CP01H notice they sent you. Also check if your local office does appointments - some are appointment-only now. The verification itself is quick but yeah, the wait times can be brutal. Hang in there!

Has anyone tried filing as Head of Household instead? I've heard that might be an option if your spouse is a nonresident alien and doesn't live with you in the US. Could save on taxes compared to MFS.

I went through this exact situation two years ago when I got married to my husband who was still in the UK waiting for his green card. Here's what I learned from experience: You absolutely cannot e-file with "NRA" in the SSN field - every tax software I tried (TurboTax, H&R Block, FreeTaxUSA) rejected it immediately. The IRS e-filing system requires a valid 9-digit identifier. My recommendation is to go the ITIN route if you plan to file jointly in future years or if your spouse will be coming to the US soon. Yes, it takes 8-10 weeks to get the ITIN, but it's worth it for the convenience of e-filing. You'll need to submit Form W-7 along with your tax return and original or certified copies of your spouse's identification documents. If you need to file immediately and don't want to wait for an ITIN, paper filing with "NRA" written in the spouse SSN field is perfectly acceptable. I did this my first year and had no issues - just make sure to clearly write "NRA" and don't leave it blank. One tip: if you do decide to get an ITIN, consider using a Certified Acceptance Agent (CAA) who can verify your spouse's documents instead of mailing originals to the IRS. It's safer and often faster.

Has anyone used TurboTax to handle two mortgages like this? I'm wondering if it walks you through all these complications or if I need to get a tax professional this year.

One thing to keep in mind is that you can't actually "choose" which mortgage to claim - if both properties qualify as your primary residence and second home, you're entitled to deduct the interest on both mortgages up to the applicable limits. You can't selectively ignore one to maximize the other. What you CAN do is make sure you're maximizing the deductible portions within the rules. Since your first mortgage ($550k) is grandfathered under the old $1M limit, you can deduct all the interest on that. For your new $1.3M mortgage, you'd be able to deduct interest on $750k of that loan amount. The key is making sure your total itemized deductions (including both mortgage interests, state taxes, charitable donations, etc.) exceed the standard deduction to make itemizing worthwhile. With mortgages totaling $1.85M, you'll likely have substantial interest payments that would justify itemizing.

Just to add another perspective - I'm a spouse who didn't file for several years (not quite 12, but about 5). When my husband and I got married, he insisted I get caught up before we filed jointly. I was so embarrassed and kept putting it off, but the mental weight of knowing I was non-compliant was actually worse than the process of fixing it. If your wife is feeling overwhelmed, maybe offer to help her get started with just the most recent year? Breaking it down into smaller steps made it way less intimidating for me. Also, something my husband did that really helped: he didn't judge me or make me feel stupid about it. He just treated it like a practical problem we could solve together. That approach made a huge difference in my willingness to tackle it.

Hey Austin, I completely understand your stress about this situation. You're smart to be thinking about filing separately - that's definitely the safer route given your wife's tax history. One thing I'd add to the great advice already given: even if you file married filing separately this year, you and your wife can still work together to tackle her unfiled returns without it affecting your current tax liability. The IRS treats each spouse's tax obligations separately when you file MFS, so her past issues won't impact your clean record. From a practical standpoint, I'd suggest having an honest conversation with your wife about getting current with her taxes. The anxiety and uncertainty of having unfiled returns hanging over your heads will only get worse with time. Plus, as others mentioned, she might actually be owed refunds for some of those years. If she's willing to start the process, beginning with just the most recent year or two can make it feel less overwhelming. The IRS is generally more interested in getting people back into compliance than punishing them, especially when there's no indication of intentional fraud. Good luck with whatever you decide!

Just FYI for anyone else in this situation - if you're filing an extension, you don't actually NEED to use the online system. You can mail in Form 4868 or even have your tax preparer e-file the extension for you. Don't stress if you can't access the online system!

I'm glad to see you got some good solutions here! Just wanted to add that if you're still having trouble with identity verification, you can also try calling the IRS Taxpayer Assistance Center at 844-545-5640. They have specific protocols for helping people who can't access their online accounts due to identity verification issues. Another quick tip - if you remember roughly what year you filed (even if you're not 100% sure), you can try different years when the system asks for previous return information. Sometimes people forget they filed a simple return years ago, maybe when they were a student or had a part-time job. Also, don't forget that you might have received IRS correspondence in the mail over the years that could help jog your memory about when you last filed. Check any old mail or documents you might have kept - sometimes there are clues there about your tax filing history.