Social Security Administration

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Ask the community...

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We didn't need the agreement notarized - just signed by both parties with the date. As for taxes, my accountant had me report it as rental income, but there were offsetting expenses (utilities, home repairs, etc.) so it didn't affect our tax situation much. Your mom should probably consult with a tax professional about her specific situation, though.

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Thank you! We have an appointment with SSA next week to discuss everything. I'll update here with how it goes in case it helps someone else in the future. Fingers crossed we can get this resolved without too much more stress on my sister.

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Good luck with your appointment! I went through something similar with my dad's SSI when he moved in with us after his stroke. One thing that really helped was bringing a calculator to the meeting to show exactly how we split expenses. We calculated total monthly costs (property tax ÷ 12, average utilities, groceries, etc.) and divided by the number of adults in the household. Having those numbers ready made the conversation go much smoother. Also, don't let them intimidate you - you have the right to ask questions and get clear explanations of their decisions. The caseworker we dealt with was actually pretty helpful once we showed we were serious about following the rules properly.

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That's really smart advice about bringing a calculator! I never thought about having the numbers ready like that. It probably shows SSA that you're taking it seriously and not just trying to get around the rules. Did your dad's benefits get restored to the full amount after you showed them the expense breakdown?

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I'm sorry to hear about your situation. Unfortunately, the 10-year marriage requirement is strictly enforced by SSA with very few exceptions. However, I'd recommend double-checking a few things when you call SSA: 1) Make sure they have the correct marriage and divorce dates on file - sometimes there are discrepancies that could work in your favor, 2) Ask specifically about any credits you might have earned during your marriage that could boost your own future benefits, and 3) Inquire about whether you might qualify for any disability benefits if you have health issues. Also, don't forget that you may still be eligible for benefits on your own work record, and at 53 you have time to increase those future benefits through continued employment. Good luck with your call to SSA!

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This is really helpful advice! I hadn't thought about the possibility of date discrepancies in SSA records. When I do call them, I'll make sure to have our marriage certificate and divorce decree handy to verify the exact dates. The point about checking for any credits earned during marriage is interesting too - I worked part-time for several years while we were married, so maybe that could help my own future benefits somehow. Thanks for the practical suggestions!

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I'm really sorry for your loss and the difficult situation you're facing. While the 10-year rule is unfortunately very strict, I wanted to mention a couple of things that might be worth exploring when you call SSA. First, make absolutely certain they have your correct marriage and divorce dates - even a few days difference could matter if there's any discrepancy in their records. Second, since your ex-husband never remarried, you might want to ask about any potential one-time death benefit (though this is typically only $255 and goes to surviving spouses or children). Most importantly, use this as motivation to maximize your own Social Security earnings record over the next 14 years before your full retirement age. Every year of higher earnings can replace lower-earning years in your benefit calculation. I know it's not the answer you were hoping for, but focusing on what you can control moving forward will serve you well.

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my husband died last year and Im still fighting with them to get my survivors benefits! they keep saying im missing paperwork but wont tell me what! this retirement stuff seems so much easier than what im going through!!! consider yourself lucky!!!

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I'm very sorry for your loss and the difficulties you're experiencing. Survivor claims can indeed be more complex than retirement claims. I'd recommend requesting a specific list of required documents in writing from your local office. You might also consider filing a request for reconsideration if they've denied your claim without proper explanation. The appeals process forces them to document exactly what is missing.

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As someone who just went through this process myself (applied in November for February start), I can completely relate to that anxiety! The waiting is the worst part. I had the exact same two-bar situation for what felt like forever, and then suddenly around mid-January the third bar filled and I got my award letter within a week. Your timeline is actually really good - applying in December for April gives SSA plenty of time. I've learned that retirement applications are much more straightforward than other types of claims since they mainly just need to verify your work history and age, both of which are already in their system. One tip that helped my peace of mind: set up Informed Delivery with USPS if you haven't already. That way you'll know immediately when your award letter is coming in the mail. The letter will have your exact benefit amount and payment schedule, which really helps with the budget planning you mentioned. Try not to check your account more than once a week - I was obsessively checking daily and it just made the anxiety worse! You're going to be fine.

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Thank you so much for this! Your timeline gives me a lot of hope - November to February is very similar to my December to April timeline. I really appreciate the tip about Informed Delivery too, I just signed up for it after reading your comment. You're absolutely right about checking too frequently making the anxiety worse - I think I've been checking daily and it's definitely not helping my stress levels. I'll try to limit myself to once a week like you suggest. It's so reassuring to hear from someone who just went through the exact same process!

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Thank you everyone for all this helpful information! I feel much more confident about my plan now. I'm going to try to reach SSA to start my retirement benefit now, and then make sure to contact them 3 months before my FRA to initiate the switch to survivor benefits. I'll also be sure to document everything carefully along the way. I appreciate all your suggestions and experiences - it's made this whole process much less intimidating!

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One more tip that might help - when you call SSA, try calling right when they open (usually 8 AM local time) or later in the afternoon around 4-5 PM. Those tend to be less busy times. Also, if you get disconnected, don't give up! The system is frustrating but your strategy is solid and will save you money in the long run. I've seen too many people give up on legitimate benefit increases because the process was difficult. You've got this!

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This is great advice about timing the calls! I never thought about calling at specific times of day. I've been trying randomly throughout the day and just getting frustrated. I'll definitely try the early morning approach tomorrow. Thanks for the encouragement too - it's easy to get discouraged when the system seems so complicated, but hearing from people who've successfully navigated this gives me hope!

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Just wanted to add that sometimes the SSA makes mistakes in these calculations. My aunt applied for spousal benefits last year and they initially calculated it wrong. She had to appeal and it took 4 months to fix. Make sure you understand how they calculate your amount and check their math!

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That's concerning! I'm going to write down all the details of our situation and try to calculate it myself before applying. Did your aunt eventually get backpay for the months they calculated incorrectly?

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Yes, she did get the backpay eventually, but it was so stressful for her. Definitely do your own calculation first!

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Just wanted to share my recent experience - I was in almost the identical situation as you! My husband filed at 70 last month and I've been collecting since 62. I successfully applied for spousal benefits online using the method Aisha described, but I had to be really persistent. The key was logging into my Social Security account first, then going to "Apply for Benefits" and making sure to select "spouse's benefits" when prompted. The whole process took about 20 minutes once I figured out the right path. They approved my application within 2 weeks and I'm getting an extra $180/month starting this month - not huge but definitely helpful! The agent I spoke with during the follow-up call confirmed that it would have been automatic if I hadn't already been collecting my own benefits, but since I was, the separate application was required. One tip: make sure you have your husband's Social Security number handy and the exact date his benefits started. Good luck!

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