This entire discussion has been incredibly enlightening! As someone who's been putting off retiring at 62 because I was worried about the financial impact of reduced benefits plus continuing child support payments, reading through all these real experiences gives me so much hope. What really strikes me is how many people have turned this into a genuine win-win situation. The fact that children can receive benefits based on the parent's FULL retirement amount (not the reduced early retirement amount) means the kids often end up with more support money than they were getting through regular child support payments, while the retiring parent gets significant financial relief. A few things I'm taking away from this discussion: - The child's SS benefit goes to the custodial parent, but you can absolutely get your support obligation reduced through family court - File for both benefits at the same SSA appointment to streamline the process - Start the court modification process immediately when benefits begin - don't wait! - Keep paying your current support amount until the court officially changes it - Proactive communication with your ex can make a huge difference in avoiding conflict @Zoe Papadakis - really looking forward to hearing how your court hearing goes next month! Your approach of explaining the benefits to your ex upfront seems to have made the whole process much smoother. Thanks to everyone who shared their real-world experiences here. This is exactly the kind of practical guidance that makes all the difference when you're trying to plan your retirement and navigate these complex systems!

I just wanted to add my perspective as someone who went through this process about 18 months ago. I retired at 62 with a 16-year-old son living with my ex-wife, and I was initially stressed about the same concerns you have - whether this would actually help my financial situation or just shift money around. Here's what actually happened: My son qualified for $698/month in Social Security benefits based on my full retirement benefit amount. My child support obligation at the time was $525/month. I filed for modification immediately after his benefits started, and the court reduced my support to zero within about 3 months. The best part? My ex was initially skeptical about the whole thing, but when she realized our son was getting $173 MORE per month than my previous support payments, she actually became supportive of the process. Sometimes it really helps to frame this as what's best for the child rather than just trying to reduce your own payments. One practical tip: When you apply for your son's benefits, make sure SSA gives you a clear timeline for when payments will start. In my case, there was about a 6-week gap between approval and first payment, which helped me plan exactly when to file the court modification. You want to time everything so you're not paying double (support + benefits going to your ex) for any longer than necessary. This process genuinely improved my retirement financial picture while ensuring my son had MORE support money available for his needs. Definitely worth pursuing in your situation!

This entire discussion has been incredibly helpful! I'm turning 62 in late 2025 and was completely overwhelmed trying to understand divorced spouse benefits. Like so many others here, I got three completely different explanations from SSA representatives, which is both frustrating and apparently very common based on everyone's experiences. The key insights I'm taking away are: - Divorced spouse benefits are based on your ex's PIA (what he gets at FRA), not his delayed retirement amount at 70 - If you file at 62, you get reduced benefits based on YOUR age - roughly 35% of his PIA instead of the full 50% - SSA automatically calculates both your own benefit and divorced spouse benefit, paying whichever is higher - The deemed filing rules mean you can't strategically claim one and delay the other anymore I'm definitely going to follow the action plan that's emerged from this thread: SHIP counselor first, get certified documents, create a spreadsheet with all scenarios, request written estimates from SSA, and keep detailed notes of all interactions. The tip about potentially getting your ex's Social Security Statement (if you're on good terms) is brilliant for accurate calculations. Thank you to everyone who shared their real experiences - this should be required reading for anyone navigating this confusing system! It's given me confidence that with proper preparation, this process is manageable despite the inconsistencies from SSA representatives.

I'm dealing with the exact same frustration! Turning 62 early next year and the conflicting information from SSA reps is maddening. After reading through all these incredibly helpful responses, I'm realizing I've been making the same calculation mistakes - using my ex's projected age-70 benefit instead of his PIA. A couple things I wanted to add that might help others: 1. I called the SSA's main number and specifically asked to speak with someone about "divorced spouse benefits" rather than just "Social Security benefits" - I got connected to someone who seemed more knowledgeable about the specific rules, though still not perfect. 2. When I mentioned I was getting conflicting information, the representative offered to schedule a "benefits planning session" which is apparently a longer appointment specifically for complex situations like divorced spouse benefits. 3. For anyone with health concerns affecting their timeline (like the original poster), I learned that you can actually withdraw your Social Security application within 12 months if your situation changes, though you have to repay any benefits received. Not ideal, but good to know as a safety net. The SHIP counselor recommendation is gold - I had no idea these free services existed! Already found one in my area and scheduling an appointment before I do anything else with SSA. This thread has been more helpful than months of trying to get straight answers from the official channels. Thank you all!

I'm new to this community and this thread has been incredibly helpful! I'm in a similar situation - need to apply for spousal benefits but have been putting it off because the phone system seemed so intimidating. Reading everyone's experiences and tips here has really given me the confidence to move forward with scheduling my own appointment. The advice about temporarily disabling all call blocking features, answering every call during the appointment window, and having a backup plan to call SSA directly if they don't call within 30 minutes is exactly what I needed to hear. It's also reassuring to know that the representatives are understanding about these phone issues and that the actual application process is straightforward once you get connected. For those mentioning the potential for significant monthly increases and retroactive payments - that really drives home how important it is to not keep delaying this process. Joshua, your systematic preparation approach is inspiring and I'm definitely going to follow a similar game plan when I schedule my appointment. Thank you to everyone who has shared their experiences and tips. This community is such a valuable resource for navigating these complicated government processes! Good luck with your Tuesday appointment Joshua - please do update us on how it goes!

As someone who recently went through the SSA phone appointment process myself, I can confirm everything everyone has shared here is excellent advice! I had my disability review appointment about 6 weeks ago and they called from a completely random number that my phone flagged as potential spam. What worked for me was creating a temporary contact in my phone called "SSA APPOINTMENT" and adding multiple numbers to it - the main 800 number, my local office, and even a few random area codes I found online from people reporting SSA calls. That way if any of those numbers called, it would show up as "SSA APPOINTMENT" instead of unknown. The key thing is definitely turning off ALL call filtering features. I learned this the hard way when I missed my first appointment because of my phone's automatic spam detection. Don't make the same mistake I did! One tip I haven't seen mentioned yet - if you have a smartwatch that mirrors your phone calls, make sure it's charged and on your wrist during the appointment window. Sometimes you might not hear your phone ring but you'll feel the watch vibration. Joshua, your 10 AM Tuesday appointment timing is perfect. That's exactly when I had mine and the rep said morning appointments tend to have fewer technical issues. You're going to do great!

I've been a Social Security claims specialist for over 15 years and wanted to clarify a few points that seem to be causing confusion in this thread. First, the "deemed filing" rule mentioned by @Haley Bennett is absolutely correct and crucial to understand. When your wife files at 62, she's deemed to be filing for all benefits available to her at that time. When spousal benefits become available later (when you file), the reduction percentage is calculated as if she filed for spousal benefits at the same time she filed for her own benefit. Second, regarding the PIA calculations - several commenters have this right. The spousal benefit eligibility is determined by comparing her unreduced PIA to 50% of your unreduced PIA. If her PIA is $1,800 and yours is $3,100, then 50% of yours is $1,550. Since $1,800 > $1,550, she would receive NO spousal benefit regardless of filing timing. However, I'd strongly recommend double-checking her Social Security statement because many people misread the projected amounts. Make sure you're looking at her PIA (the amount at her full retirement age) not her reduced age 62 amount. Finally, given the complexity and the permanent nature of this decision, consider requesting a benefit estimate directly from SSA for your specific scenario. They can provide exact calculations based on both your earnings records. The phone wait times are frustrating, but this decision affects decades of income - it's worth the effort to get precise numbers.

As someone who recently went through this decision process with my own family, I can't emphasize enough how important it is to get your wife's exact PIA from her most recent Social Security statement. I initially thought my spouse's PIA was higher than it actually was, which completely changed our strategy. The deemed filing rule that @Jamal Washington mentioned is really the key issue here. Once your wife files at 62, she's locked into reductions on both her own benefit AND any future spousal benefit. There's no "do-over" or way to optimize later. One additional consideration that might help your decision: if your wife's PIA is actually low enough that she would qualify for spousal benefits, remember that she'll be getting her reduced own benefit PLUS a reduced spousal add-on. The total still might be less than what she'd get by waiting, but at least she'd have some income for those 5 years while you delay your filing. I'd also suggest running scenarios where one of you passes away earlier than expected. The surviving spouse gets the higher of the two benefits, so if you're the higher earner, maximizing your benefit by waiting until 70 could provide better survivor protection. Have you considered meeting with someone at your local SSA office? Sometimes seeing the actual calculations on paper helps clarify these complex interactions better than trying to figure it out from online resources.

Im still confused about something... if the husband takes SS at 62 but then keeps working, doesnt his benefit amount go up? And then wouldnt that mean the survivor benefit goes up too?

I'm in a very similar situation - my husband wants to claim at 62 and I'm torn between waiting until FRA or 70. One thing that's helped me think through this is using the SSA's online calculators to run different scenarios with our actual benefit estimates. What I discovered is that even though my husband claiming early reduces his benefit by about 30%, since my PIA is significantly higher than his, the survivor benefit question becomes less critical for our specific situation. If he passes first, I'd likely stick with my own higher benefit anyway. But here's what really opened my eyes: if I delay until 70 and then I'm the one who passes first, he would get my much higher benefit amount (including those delayed retirement credits) as his survivor benefit. That's a huge financial protection for him since his benefit will be permanently reduced from claiming early. So now I'm leaning toward letting him claim at 62 if that's what he wants, but definitely waiting until 70 myself. The 8% per year increase from 67 to 70 is just too good to pass up when you're the higher earner!