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OK I'M CONFUSED!!! I thought that if you were married for 10+ years you could claim 50% of your ex's benefit REGARDLESS of when they claim??? Isn't that the WHOLE POINT of the divorced spouse benefit?? That you don't have to coordinate with them?? Why is everyone saying you have to wait until your ex is 62? That makes NO SENSE to me and defeats the purpose of the benefit!! Also my cousin's friend got divorced after 11 years and she's getting benefits on her ex-husband's record RIGHT NOW even though he hasn't filed yet so I KNOW it's possible!!!
You're confusing two different rules: 1. You don't have to coordinate WITH your ex-spouse (they don't need to file first, and you don't need their permission) 2. BUT your ex-spouse still needs to be at least 62 (eligible for benefits) before you can claim on their record Your cousin's friend's ex-husband is presumably at least 62, which is why she can claim on his record even if he hasn't filed yet. The original poster's ex is only 51, so they wouldn't be eligible for another 11 years. The "not having to coordinate" part means once the ex is 62+, you don't need them to actually file for benefits before you can claim on their record.
Been there done that with the ex-spouse stuff. Just remember you need ur marriage certificate AND divorce decree when you apply! They made me go home and come back when I didn't have both. Super annoying since I had to take another day off work.
That's a great tip, thank you! I think I know where my divorce decree is, but I'll have to hunt down the marriage certificate. It's been so long I'm not even sure where I put it.
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To clarify the Medicare point: Yes, if the husband is covered under the wife's current employer health insurance (from her active employment), AND the employer has 20+ employees, then he can delay enrolling in Medicare Part B without penalty. He would need to get a form called \
This is all super helpful information. I definitely don't want to file early just to enable his spousal benefits if it's going to permanently reduce my benefit. It sounds like the best approach might be for him to wait until his FRA at 67 to claim his own benefit, and then I can file for mine when I reach my FRA (which would be 67 too, I think).
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One more important thing I forgot to mention - your husband should apply for the widower benefits as soon as possible after your passing (though I hope that's many years from now). The application process can be lengthy, especially for disability-based survivor benefits. Also, if he's denied initially (which happens frequently), he should definitely appeal. Many legitimate claims are denied on the first try but approved on reconsideration or at a hearing level. And having a disability attorney can help tremendously - they typically only charge if they win the case (usually 25% of backpay with a cap).
Thank you for this additional information. I've heard that many disability claims get denied initially. I'll make sure he knows to appeal if necessary. Do you know if there are any specific forms or documentation he should have ready? I want to prepare as much as possible for him.
When my father died, my disabled mother had a similar situation. A key thing that helped was having a "funeral fund" set aside because survivor benefits don't start immediately, and there's often a gap period with no income. Also, make sure your husband knows where all important documents are kept - death certificate, marriage certificate, your SS number, birth certificates, etc. The SSA requires these for the application process. Having them organized ahead of time saved my mom a lot of stress.
This is really practical advice, thank you. I hadn't thought about the gap between when I might pass and when benefits would actually start coming in. I'll start setting aside some emergency funds and get our documents organized in one place.
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Update: I finally got through to SSA after trying different times of day (Wednesday at 4pm seemed to have shorter wait times). The agent confirmed that I can indeed claim the full survivor benefit at 66 and 10 months instead of waiting until 67 and 2 months. They also said I absolutely need the death certificate - they won't process the claim without it. I'm going to request one from the county where he passed away. Thanks everyone for your help!
glad u got thru! good luck with everything!
MAKE SURE you keep copies of EVERYTHING you send them!!! My friend had her original marriage certificate LOST by SSA and it was a nightmare to replace!!! They deny everything when they make mistakes!!!
Oh no, that's terrible! Thanks for the warning - I'll definitely make copies of everything before I submit anything.
NeonNova
My cousin took her ex spousal benefit at 62 and regrets it SO MUCH cause it got reduced like 30%! Def wait for ur FRA if u can afford to!
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Yuki Tanaka
•This is good advice. Taking ex-spouse benefits early results in the same reduction percentages as taking your own retirement benefits early. At 62, that's approximately a 30% permanent reduction from what you'd get at FRA. The only time it might make sense to claim early is if you absolutely need the income or have health concerns that might limit your longevity.
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Carmen Diaz
wait im confused does this mean my ex taking SS early screws me over? or not? can someone explain this in simple terms plz
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Ethan Wilson
•No, your ex taking Social Security early does NOT affect your benefit amount. Your ex-spouse benefit is based on what your ex would have received at their full retirement age (their PIA), NOT what they actually receive after early retirement reductions. The only thing that reduces YOUR ex-spouse benefit is if YOU take it before YOUR full retirement age. If your ex takes it early, it has zero impact on your potential benefit amount.
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