dont u get paid for the month before? like january payment comes in february? thats what my neighbor told me and shes been on SS for years

Great question and perfect timing to be planning this out! I just went through this process myself earlier this year. The 3-month rule is definitely the sweet spot - so for January 2025 benefits, you'll want to apply in October 2024. One thing I learned that might help: when you're filling out the online application, pay close attention to the "Benefits Start Date" section. There's a clear dropdown where you select the month, and it will show you exactly when your first payment will arrive (remember, January benefits are paid in February). Since your wife is taking early retirement, make sure she's prepared for the earnings test if she plans to work at all in 2025. The online application will walk you through this, but it's good to know ahead of time. Also, don't stress too much about the applications being separate - you can both do them on the same day if you want, just using your individual MySocialSecurity accounts. The process is pretty straightforward once you get started. Good luck with your retirement!

Thank you all for the helpful responses! I'm going to try calling with my mother present first so she can give verbal authorization. Then I'll look into the Form SSA-1696 for longer-term help. I'll specifically ask about the GPO reduction, maximum survivor benefits, and those Medicare assistance programs mentioned. Really appreciate all the advice!

Just wanted to add - if your mom gets overwhelmed during the call or has trouble remembering information, don't hesitate to ask the SSA representative to slow down or repeat things. They're usually understanding about helping elderly callers. Also, have a pen and paper ready to write down any important information they provide, like case numbers, benefit amounts, or next steps. Sometimes they speak quickly and it's easy to miss details. Good luck with getting through - the wait times can be brutal but it's worth it to get her benefits sorted out properly.

Don't beat yourself up too much about filing early - sometimes you need the money when you need it! I'm in a similar boat and found that calling SSA's automated phone line (1-800-772-1213) can actually give you some basic benefit information without waiting for a human. Press 0 to get to the menu, then you can request they mail you a detailed benefit statement that shows your PIA. It takes about 10 days but might save you the hassle of trying to get through to someone. Also, if your husband hasn't filed yet, you might want to run some scenarios on when he should file - if he can wait past his FRA, his benefits increase 8% per year until age 70, which would also increase your potential spousal benefit.

Just wanted to add my experience - I was in almost the exact same situation! Filed at 62, husband waited until his FRA. The key thing that helped me understand it was realizing that Social Security basically looks at two scenarios when your husband files: 1) Keep getting what you're already getting, or 2) Get a spousal benefit. You get whichever is higher, not both. In my case, I got an extra $180/month when my husband filed. Not huge, but every bit helps! One tip - if you have trouble finding your PIA (Primary Insurance Amount) on your Social Security statement, it's sometimes listed as your "full retirement age benefit amount" in the online portal. That's the number they use for the 50% spousal calculation, not your reduced amount. Good luck!

Regarding the timing - you mentioned you're 58½ now, so you have about 18 months before reaching that age 60 threshold. It might be worth explaining the situation to your girlfriend if the relationship is serious. Many people understand the importance of financial planning, especially when significant benefits are at stake. Also remember that survivor benefits can be claimed as early as age 60 (with a reduction), or you can wait until your Full Retirement Age for the full amount. This is another factor to consider in your overall planning.

As someone who works in financial planning, I'd strongly recommend getting an official benefit estimate from SSA before making this decision. You can create a my Social Security account online at ssa.gov to see your projected benefits and potentially request a survivor benefit estimate. Given that you mentioned your late wife had a much stronger work record over 22 years, the financial impact of timing this decision could be substantial - potentially thousands of dollars per month difference. Also consider that if you do wait until 60 to remarry, you'll have more flexibility in your claiming strategy. You could potentially claim reduced survivor benefits at 60 and then switch to your own (possibly higher) retirement benefit later if that makes sense. Having actual numbers will help you make an informed decision and might make the conversation with your girlfriend easier - framing it as responsible financial planning rather than just delaying marriage.

Just wanted to add one more thing that might be helpful - when you do apply for your benefits next month, you can also ask SSA to run a benefit estimate for your husband's potential spousal benefits, even though it looks like he won't qualify based on the numbers you've shared. Sometimes there are quirks in the calculations or special circumstances that aren't immediately obvious. Plus, having that official calculation on file could be useful down the road. The worst they can say is "no additional benefits available" but at least you'll know for certain. Good luck with your application!

I just went through a similar situation with my parents last year. One thing that might be worth considering - even if your husband doesn't qualify for spousal benefits now, the rules can sometimes work differently if there are changes in your circumstances later. For example, if you decide to suspend your benefits at some point (which you can do after FRA), or if there are any adjustments to your benefit amounts due to continued work or other factors. Also, I'd recommend keeping detailed records of both of your Social Security statements and any communications with SSA about this. My mom wished she had done this because when questions came up later, it was hard to reconstruct exactly what had been discussed. The SSA representatives are generally helpful, but having your own documentation makes everything smoother. Best of luck with your application next month!