I'm new to this community but had to jump in because this exact situation is happening in my household right now! My husband has been insisting that if I claim spousal benefits, it will somehow reduce his Social Security payment. Reading through all these responses has been such a huge relief - it's clear that this misconception is incredibly common among husbands! What really strikes me is how many different ways people have explained the same concept: separate accounts, different programs, insurance policies, library sections - all pointing to the same fundamental truth that spousal benefits don't affect the primary worker's benefit at all. I'm definitely bookmarking this entire thread to show my husband. Between all the personal experiences from couples who've actually navigated this successfully, the professional insights, and even the regulation references people have shared, I think I finally have enough ammunition to convince him he's wrong! Thank you to everyone who shared their stories - it's so validating to know that we're not the only couple dealing with this confusion. The Social Security system is complex enough without having to fight with your spouse about how it actually works! 😅

I'm new to this community but wanted to share my experience since it's so relevant to your situation! My husband and I literally went through this exact same debate last year when we were both turning 65. He was absolutely convinced that if I claimed spousal benefits, his Social Security check would somehow be smaller each month. What finally convinced him was when I made him call the SSA with me on speaker phone. The representative was incredibly patient and explained it using a really simple analogy: think of Social Security like a big government vault with different compartments. Your husband's retirement benefit comes from one compartment that's labeled with his name and social security number - that money is his based on his work history, and nobody else can touch it. Spousal benefits come from a completely separate compartment that's specifically set aside by Congress to help support spouses with lower earnings records. The rep also mentioned that spousal benefits were actually added to Social Security in 1939 specifically because lawmakers realized that many wives had little to no work history outside the home, and they didn't want those women to be left with nothing in retirement. The whole point was to strengthen families financially, not to penalize anyone. Reading through all these responses, it's clear your husband is definitely not alone in this misconception! Show him this thread - sometimes hearing from multiple real people who've actually been through this exact situation is more convincing than government pamphlets. You're absolutely right, and once he understands how it really works, you'll both be able to move forward with confidence in your retirement planning!

I'm so sorry for your loss and the additional stress this bureaucratic delay is causing you during an already difficult time. As a newcomer to this community, I've been reading through everyone's helpful advice and wanted to add a few thoughts. You're absolutely right to pursue this - your husband's estate is entitled to that March payment since he was alive for the entire month. The fact that you're now at 6+ months is definitely beyond the normal 4-6 month processing time everyone mentions. Based on what I've read here, I'd suggest trying a multi-pronged approach: First, call early morning (8am) with those specific questions others outlined about alerts, holds, and fund confirmation status. Second, if that doesn't yield results, definitely consider reaching out to your congressional representative's office - they can often cut through bureaucratic delays much faster than individual calls. One thing I noticed from similar posts is that sometimes these claims get stuck on technical issues that aren't communicated clearly. The suggestion about confirming SSA actually received the returned funds is particularly important since there can be delays between when you see the bank withdrawal and when their system registers it. Keep detailed notes of every interaction and don't accept vague "it's in queue" responses. You deserve specific answers about what's preventing this from moving forward. Hang in there - you're advocating for something the estate is rightfully owed.

I'm so sorry for your loss and the frustration you're experiencing with this delay. As a newcomer to this community, I've been reading through all the helpful advice shared here and wanted to offer some additional support. You're absolutely entitled to that March payment since your husband was alive for the entire month, and being at 6+ months is definitely beyond the normal processing timeframe. From what I've learned reading similar cases, it sounds like there might be a specific technical issue holding things up that hasn't been properly communicated to you. I'd recommend calling SSA at 8am sharp using those specific questions others have outlined - particularly asking about alerts/holds on your claim and whether they've confirmed receipt of the returned funds. Sometimes there's a disconnect between when you see the withdrawal from the bank account and when SSA's system actually registers they have the money back. If the phone calls don't yield concrete answers, definitely consider contacting your congressional representative's office. They have staff specifically trained to help with federal agency issues and can often get movement on claims that have been stalled. Most importantly, don't accept any more vague "it's in queue" responses. You've waited long enough and deserve specific information about what's preventing this from being processed. Document everything and keep advocating - this is money your husband's estate is rightfully owed.

I'm so sorry for your loss. Dealing with government bureaucracy while grieving is incredibly difficult. I went through something similar when my father passed two years ago. A few practical tips that helped us: First, try calling the SSA number (1-800-772-1213) very early in the morning - around 8 AM when they open. The wait times are usually shorter then. Second, if you have a local SSA office, you might have better luck walking in early in the morning to schedule an appointment rather than trying to call. Third, start gathering all your documents now - death certificate (you'll need certified copies, not just one), marriage certificate, both Social Security cards, and your ID. Having everything ready will make the process smoother when you do get through. The retroactive benefits mentioned by others are accurate - you have time, so don't add more stress to yourself. Take care of yourself during this difficult time.

I'm so sorry for your loss. Going through this process while grieving is incredibly difficult. I wanted to add a few things that might help: If you're having trouble getting through by phone, many local SSA offices allow you to schedule appointments online at ssa.gov - look for "Find an Office" and then check if your local office offers online appointment scheduling. This might be easier than waiting on hold or walking in. Also, when you do apply, make sure to ask specifically about the lump sum death payment ($255) - it's a small amount but every bit helps during this time. The SSA representative should automatically process this when you apply for survivor benefits, but it's worth confirming. You're absolutely right that you'll likely receive the higher amount (your husband's $2,200 rather than your $1,450), and as others mentioned, you have up to 12 months to apply with retroactive benefits, so try not to stress about rushing while you're handling everything else. Take care of yourself first.

Welcome to the community! I'm new here but have been following your situation with great interest. As someone who recently went through my own confusing Social Security experience, I really feel for what you're dealing with. Reading through all these responses has been incredibly educational - the community knowledge here is amazing! It's clear you've received some excellent technical guidance about family maximum calculations, specific documents to request, and potential issues with your base FMB calculation. One thing that struck me is how many different technical rules and exceptions might apply to your unique situation - the Combined Family Maximum rule, simultaneous entitlement issues, the SSI transition complications, and the staggered approval timing. It's no wonder the regular SSA reps have been giving you conflicting information - this level of complexity clearly requires a Technical Expert who understands all these interconnected rules. I'm really impressed by how thorough everyone has been in providing specific POMS sections, document names, and technical terms you can reference. Having that level of preparation should make a huge difference when you finally get that face-to-face appointment with someone who can properly review your case. Please keep us all updated on how it goes - your experience is going to be incredibly valuable for other community members who might face similar complex family benefit situations in the future. Good luck getting everything sorted out!

Welcome to the community! I'm new here but have been reading through this thread with great interest as someone who's also navigating the complex world of Social Security benefits. Your situation really highlights how challenging these family maximum benefit calculations can be, especially when you have multiple types of beneficiaries like you do. The advice you've received here has been incredibly comprehensive - from specific document names to request, to technical rules that might apply, to the potential issues with your base FMB calculation. What really stands out to me is how this thread demonstrates the importance of persistence and preparation when dealing with SSA. The fact that you now have specific POMS sections to reference, technical terms to use, and detailed questions to ask should make a huge difference in getting accurate answers. I'm particularly intrigued by Olivia's point about the Combined Family Maximum rule for DAC benefits - that seems like it could be a significant factor that's been overlooked in your case. The combination of that plus the potential bend point calculation errors could explain why your numbers don't match expectations. Best of luck with your upcoming Technical Expert appointment! I hope you get the clear answers and correct calculations you deserve. Please do keep us posted - your experience will undoubtedly help other community members facing similar complex family benefit situations.

As a new member of this community, I've been reading through this entire discussion and I'm honestly shocked at how many red flags your neighbor's proposal raises. The Medicare premium implications alone could cost you thousands - I had no idea IRMAA increases could be so significant and last for multiple years. What really strikes me is how many people have shared nearly identical experiences: unexpected Medicare premium increases, family members who stopped speaking to them, legal complications they never anticipated. The pattern is so consistent it's almost like a warning playbook of what not to do. I think the suggestion about helping your neighbor sell the house while she's still alive might be the simplest solution of all. It completely eliminates the inheritance/income issue for you, avoids all the executor complications, and still allows her to distribute the proceeds however she wants through a proper will or trust. The fact that the house needs $45k in repairs but is paid off suggests it probably has decent underlying value. Even in rough condition, if she can net enough to make meaningful distributions to her relatives, everyone wins - and you're completely protected from the Medicare and family drama issues everyone's described. Your neighbor is lucky to have someone who cares enough to research all these implications rather than just agreeing to help without understanding the consequences. Good luck with whatever approach you ultimately choose!

As a newcomer to this community, I've been following this discussion and wanted to add some perspective from my recent experience with Medicare and estate issues. The consensus here is absolutely right - your neighbor's proposal could create serious problems for you. I went through something similar last year when my uncle left me his property, and even though I consulted an attorney beforehand, I still got hit with unexpected Medicare premium increases that I'm still dealing with. One thing I haven't seen mentioned is the timing aspect of IRMAA appeals. If you do end up with increased premiums from an inheritance, you have to wait until the following year to file Form SSA-44 for a life-changing event appeal, and even then it's not guaranteed to be approved. So you could be stuck paying higher premiums for at least a full year, possibly two. The suggestion about having your neighbor sell the house herself while alive really is the smartest approach. It eliminates all the inheritance complications for you while still giving her control over how the proceeds are distributed. Plus, if she's 83 and the house needs that much work, selling sooner rather than later might actually get her a better price before the repairs become even more urgent. Your financial security on a fixed income is too important to risk, even for a well-meaning neighbor. The fact that you're researching this thoroughly shows you're being a good friend by helping her find better solutions rather than just agreeing to something that could hurt both of you long-term.