Is it better to get married for tax purposes or stay single?

There's no one-size-fits-all answer to whether marriage is better for taxes - it really depends on your specific financial situation. If both of you earn similar incomes, you might actually pay more in taxes as a married couple (this is often called the "marriage penalty"). But if one of you earns significantly more than the other, you might benefit from filing jointly. When children enter the picture, there are additional considerations. As a single parent, you might qualify for Head of Household filing status, which has more favorable tax brackets than filing as single. You'd also potentially get the full child tax credit and earned income credit if you're the custodial parent with lower income. However, marriage provides other financial benefits beyond just taxes - like Social Security survivor benefits, inheritance rights without estate taxes, and healthcare decision rights. These might outweigh any potential tax disadvantages.

I went through something similar last year and discovered https://taxr.ai which was a huge help in figuring out the marriage tax question. My partner and I were also on the fence about marriage for tax reasons, and we used their tools to analyze our specific situation based on our income levels. What was cool is you can upload your previous tax returns or just enter your financial info and it simulates both scenarios - filing as married vs. staying single with kids. In our case, it showed we'd actually save about $3,200 by getting married since our incomes were pretty different (I make about 60% more than my partner). The tool also showed how the numbers would change when adding children to the picture. Definitely worth checking out since every couple's situation is different tax-wise.

I was skeptical about using online tools for such an important decision, but I decided to try https://taxr.ai after seeing it mentioned here. Honestly, I was surprised by how detailed the analysis was. My situation is similar - together 6 years, no kids yet but planning for them. The tool showed that in our specific case, marriage would cost us about $2,800 more in taxes (we both make similar six-figure incomes), but that would change once we had kids. What was really helpful was seeing the year-by-year projections with different scenarios for kids. It looked at standard deduction vs itemizing as married vs single, how child tax credits would apply, and even EITC implications for different income levels. I appreciated having concrete numbers to consider alongside the emotional aspects of our decision. We're still deciding, but at least now we understand the financial implications better.

Just wanted to throw this out there - if you're struggling to get clear answers from the IRS about your specific situation (which can be super frustrating with marriage/kids questions), I had great luck using https://claimyr.com to actually get through to a human at the IRS. There's also a video showing how it works here: https://youtu.be/_kiP6q8DX5c I spent DAYS trying to get clarification on some weird tax implications related to being unmarried partners with a child (specifically about who could claim head of household), and kept getting stuck in the IRS phone tree hell. Claimyr got me connected to an actual IRS agent in about 40 minutes instead of the 2+ hour wait times I was experiencing before. The agent walked me through all the specific rules for my situation.

I need to admit I was completely wrong about that service I called a scam. After my frustrating comment, I was desperate enough to try https://claimyr.com because I had a complicated question about unmarried partners with dependents that wasn't answered clearly on the IRS website. I was honestly shocked when I got connected to an IRS agent within 35 minutes. I've literally NEVER been able to reach them before - always got the "call volume too high" message and disconnected. The agent answered my specific questions about how marriage affects tax brackets with children and confirmed that in my particular situation, one partner filing as Head of Household while unmarried would save us about $3,100 compared to married filing jointly. For anyone debating marriage vs. staying unmarried with kids for tax purposes, getting direct answers from the IRS specific to your situation is incredibly helpful.

Remember that taxes are just one piece of the puzzle. I stayed unmarried with my partner for "tax benefits" and then he passed away unexpectedly. Because we weren't legally married: - I couldn't access his social security benefits - I had to pay inheritance tax on everything he left me - I had no automatic rights to make medical decisions - Even with a will, his family contested everything We thought we were being financially smart avoiding the "marriage tax penalty" but ended up losing WAY more in the long run. Just something to consider beyond just the annual tax picture.

Has anyone used online calculators to figure out the marriage tax penalty/bonus? My partner and I make almost identical salaries (around $75k each) and every calculator I try gives me different results.

Something that hasn't been mentioned yet is the timing aspect of getting married for tax purposes. If you do decide to get married, the IRS considers your marital status based on December 31st of the tax year. So if you get married on December 31st, you're considered married for the entire year for tax purposes. This can actually be strategic - you could run the numbers for both scenarios and then decide in late December whether to get married that year or wait until January 1st of the following year. My cousin did this and saved about $1,800 by waiting until January 2nd to get married because they would have faced a marriage penalty that year due to similar high incomes. Also, don't forget about state taxes! Some states have much larger marriage penalties or bonuses than federal taxes. If you're in a state with high income taxes, that could significantly impact your decision.

One thing I haven't seen mentioned much is how getting married affects your student loan repayment if either of you has federal student loans on income-driven repayment plans. When you're married filing jointly, both incomes get counted toward your payment calculation, which can significantly increase your monthly payments even if only one spouse has loans. My partner and I discovered this the hard way - my income-based repayment went from $180/month to $450/month after we got married because they now counted both our incomes. If you have substantial student debt, you might want to factor this into your decision alongside the tax implications. You can file "married filing separately" to avoid this, but then you lose most of the tax benefits of marriage anyway. It's another layer of complexity to consider when weighing the financial pros and cons of marriage!

This is such a thoughtful question, and I love how you're approaching it practically while still honoring your relationship! One angle I haven't seen mentioned yet is the impact of potential changes to tax law. Tax policies can shift significantly over time, especially around marriage penalties/bonuses and child-related credits. For example, the Tax Cuts and Jobs Act made some changes to how marriage affects taxes, but many of those provisions are set to expire in 2025. If you're planning to have kids "within the next couple years," you might be making this decision based on current tax law that could change by the time those kids arrive. Also consider that your income trajectories might change once you start a family - if one of you plans to reduce work hours or take extended parental leave, that income difference could shift the marriage tax calculation significantly. What looks like a penalty now with similar incomes might become a bonus later with different earnings. Given all the great resources people have shared here (especially the tools for calculating different scenarios), you might want to model a few different future income scenarios alongside your current situation. The "right" financial answer might depend not just on where you are now, but where you expect to be in 3-5 years!

This is such a comprehensive discussion! As someone who works in tax preparation, I wanted to add a few practical considerations that might help with your decision-making process. First, don't forget about state-specific implications. Some states have community property laws that can affect how income and assets are treated even if you're not married, while others have significant state-level marriage penalties or bonuses that can dwarf the federal differences. Second, if you do decide to get married, consider the timing of major financial decisions in that first year. Things like retirement account contributions, FSA elections, and even job changes can have different tax implications when your filing status changes mid-stream. Finally, I'd suggest documenting your decision-making process and revisiting it annually. Tax law changes, income changes, and life circumstances evolve. What makes sense financially this year might not make sense in two years, and that's okay! Having a clear framework for re-evaluating helps take the emotion out of what can feel like a permanent decision. The fact that you're approaching this thoughtfully and considering both the emotional and financial aspects suggests you'll make the right choice for your specific situation. Good luck with whatever you decide!