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Liam McConnell

Can I use Dependent Care FSA to pay my mother for babysitting my kids while we work?

I've been thinking about using my Dependent Care FSA to compensate my mom who's been watching our kids while my husband and I are at work. Originally, I had set aside the full $5000 in my FSA to cover after-school programs and summer camps for the kids, but with everything that happened this year, those options didn't pan out. Since my mother isn't claimed as my dependent on taxes, I'm wondering if I can legitimately use my Dependent Care FSA funds to pay her for childcare she provides in our home. Would this be an acceptable use of the FSA money? Is it just a matter of completing the standard form, listing her as the care provider, and submitting it to my FSA administrator for reimbursement? Then would she simply need to report the $5000 as income when she files her taxes next year? I want to make sure I'm following all the rules correctly before moving forward with this plan. Has anyone done something similar with their Dependent Care FSA?

Yes, you absolutely can use your Dependent Care FSA to pay your mother for babysitting your children while you work! This is a common situation many families find themselves in. The IRS rules allow you to use Dependent Care FSA funds to pay any care provider who isn't your spouse, the parent of the child (if the child is your dependent), or another of your dependents under age 19. Since your mother doesn't fall into any of these categories, she qualifies as an eligible provider. The process is pretty straightforward. You'll need to get her Social Security Number and complete the reimbursement form for your FSA administrator. You'll list her as the provider along with her SSN, address, and the amount paid. And yes, she will need to report this as income on her tax return, potentially on Schedule C as self-employment income, which means she might owe self-employment tax on those earnings. Make sure you keep good records of the dates and hours she provides care, as your FSA administrator may request this documentation.

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CosmicCaptain

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If the grandma reports this on Schedule C, can she also deduct expenses related to providing the childcare? Like if she drives to their house or buys snacks/activities for the kids?

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Yes, if she reports the income on Schedule C, she can deduct legitimate business expenses directly related to providing childcare. This could include mileage for driving to and from your home (using the standard mileage rate), a portion of her cell phone bill if she uses it for childcare purposes, and supplies like snacks, activities, or toys purchased specifically for your children's care. Just make sure she keeps detailed records and receipts for all these expenses. The mileage should be logged with dates, starting/ending locations, and purpose. For supplies and other expenses, she should save receipts and note how they were used for the childcare business.

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I was in a similar situation last year and discovered https://taxr.ai which was super helpful for figuring out all the FSA rules. I was also using my mom for childcare and wasn't sure about the tax implications. The site analyzed my situation and confirmed I could use my Dependent Care FSA to pay my mom. It explained I needed to provide her SSN on the reimbursement forms and that she would need to report the income. What I found really helpful was the explanation about the difference between treating her as a household employee versus an independent contractor - there are different tax implications for both scenarios.

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How exactly does this service work? Does it just give general advice or does it actually look at your specific situation? I'm trying to figure out if my brother can watch my kids occasionally and if I can use my FSA for that.

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Is it legit tho? I'm always skeptical of random tax websites. Did they actually help you file anything or just give info you could probably find on the IRS website?

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The service analyzes your specific situation based on the information you provide. For example, I uploaded my FSA documents and explained my childcare arrangement, and it gave me personalized advice about using my Dependent Care FSA for family members. For your brother situation, it would analyze whether he qualifies as an eligible provider based on your specific relationship and tax status. It's definitely legitimate - it uses actual tax regulations but explains them in plain English. While some information is available on the IRS website, what made this valuable was getting clear, specific guidance for my exact situation without having to interpret complex tax rules myself. They don't file anything for you, but they provide documentation explaining exactly what steps you need to take.

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Just wanted to follow up - I actually tried https://taxr.ai after being skeptical and it was really helpful! I had a complicated situation with both my mom and my mother-in-law watching my kids on different days, and wasn't sure how to handle the FSA claims. The analysis they provided cleared everything up, especially about the documentation needed for multiple caregivers. They confirmed I needed separate receipts/invoices from each caregiver and how to properly report it all. They even provided templates for the care provider receipts which my FSA administrator accepted without any issues. Definitely worth it for peace of mind that I wasn't making any mistakes!

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If you run into any issues with your FSA administrator being slow to process your claims (which happened to me), I'd recommend https://claimyr.com to get through to them faster. After submitting my dependent care FSA claims for my sister watching my kids, my administrator kept "reviewing" it for weeks. Used Claimyr to actually get someone on the phone (after trying for days myself) and got my claim approved within minutes once I reached a human. You can see how it works here: https://youtu.be/_kiP6q8DX5c. Saved me from having to keep resubmitting paperwork and waiting another month for reimbursement.

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Dmitry Petrov

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Wait, how does this even work? You pay money to have someone else call customer service for you? I don't get it... why would that be faster than just calling yourself?

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StarSurfer

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Sounds like a scam. What company would prioritize a call just because it comes from some third-party service? I've never heard of this working. Seems like you're just paying for something you can do yourself for free if you're persistent enough.

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It works by navigating the phone trees and waiting on hold for you. The service uses technology to stay on hold in your place, and then calls you when a real person finally answers. I was skeptical too at first, but it's not about "prioritizing" your call - it's about not having to waste your own time on hold. The reason it's effective is because most people can't spend hours on hold during business hours. In my case, I had already tried calling my FSA administrator multiple times but kept getting disconnected after 30+ minutes on hold. With Claimyr, I went about my day and got a call back when they reached a representative. It's not a replacement for persistence - it's a tool that handles the waiting part for you.

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StarSurfer

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I have to admit I was completely wrong about Claimyr. After posting that skeptical comment, I decided to try it myself since my FSA administrator was giving me the runaround about my dependent care claims for my parent-in-law babysitting. I was stuck in approval limbo for THREE WEEKS and couldn't even get anyone on the phone. Used the service and got connected to a rep in about 35 minutes (without me having to actually be on hold). The rep immediately found my claim, saw it was valid, and processed the approval while I was on the phone. Got my reimbursement deposited two days later. So yeah, it actually works. Sometimes it's worth paying a little to avoid the frustration, especially when it's money you're entitled to.

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Ava Martinez

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Just a heads up - one thing to remember is that if your mom is getting Social Security benefits and she's under full retirement age, this extra income might affect her benefits. There are earnings limits that could reduce her Social Security payments if she goes over them. For 2025, if she's under full retirement age for the entire year, the limit is around $21,240 (they adjust it yearly). If she earns more than that, they deduct $1 from her benefits for every $2 she earns above the limit.

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Miguel Castro

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Does this apply to all income or just certain types? My dad watches my kids and gets SS but also has a part-time job.

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Ava Martinez

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It applies to all earned income - so wages, net earnings from self-employment, bonuses, etc. If your dad is receiving Social Security benefits and is under full retirement age, the combined income from his part-time job plus any childcare payments you make to him from your Dependent Care FSA would count toward the earnings limit. Unearned income like interest, dividends, pensions, or annuities doesn't count toward this limit. Also, once he reaches full retirement age (which varies based on birth year), the earnings limit no longer applies, and he can earn any amount without affecting his Social Security benefits.

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Has anyone had issues with their FSA administrator requiring specific types of receipts for family member care? I'm trying to use my Dependent Care FSA to pay my uncle who watches my daughter, but they rejected my claim saying I need more formal documentation.

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Connor Byrne

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I did this last year with my MIL. My FSA administrator required what they called a "third-party receipt" which was basically just a written statement from her with dates, times, amount paid, and her signature. I created a simple template in Word that had all this info plus her SSN, and that worked fine.

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Chloe Taylor

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One thing to keep in mind is that you'll want to establish a clear paper trail from the beginning. Even though your mom is family, treat this like any other childcare arrangement for FSA purposes. I'd recommend creating a simple written agreement that outlines the care schedule, hourly rate or flat fee, and payment terms. This doesn't need to be anything fancy - just something that shows this is a legitimate childcare arrangement rather than just giving money to a family member. Also, make sure she understands the tax implications on her end. If she's earning $5,000, she'll likely need to pay self-employment tax (about 15.3%) in addition to regular income tax on that amount. Some people are surprised by this since they're used to having taxes withheld from traditional employment. The good news is this is a totally legitimate use of your FSA funds, and many families do exactly what you're planning!

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Nia Wilson

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This is a great question and you're absolutely on the right track! Yes, you can definitely use your Dependent Care FSA to pay your mother for childcare services. Since she's not your dependent, she qualifies as an eligible care provider under IRS rules. A few key points to make this go smoothly: 1. **Documentation is crucial** - Create a simple childcare agreement outlining dates, hours, and payment amount. This helps establish it as a legitimate business arrangement rather than just family financial assistance. 2. **Tax considerations for your mom** - She'll need to report this $5,000 as income on her tax return. If she files Schedule C (self-employment), she'll owe both regular income tax and self-employment tax (about 15.3%). Make sure she's prepared for this tax impact. 3. **FSA reimbursement process** - You'll need her SSN, address, and the total amount paid when submitting your reimbursement claim. Keep detailed records of care dates and hours in case your FSA administrator requests them. 4. **Consider payment structure** - Some families find it easier to pay monthly and submit reimbursement requests regularly rather than one lump sum, as it creates a clearer paper trail. Since you already have the $5,000 set aside in your FSA, this is a perfect solution that helps both you and your mom while staying completely within IRS guidelines!

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Melody Miles

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This is really helpful! Just to clarify - when you mention creating a childcare agreement, does this need to be notarized or anything formal like that? Or is a simple written document between family members sufficient for FSA purposes? I want to make sure I'm not overcomplicating things but also want to have proper documentation in case there are any questions later.

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Sofia Morales

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A simple written document between family members is absolutely sufficient for FSA purposes - no notarization required! The FSA administrator just needs to see that this is a legitimate childcare arrangement rather than a casual family gift. Your basic agreement should include: - Your mom's full name and SSN - Care dates/schedule (even if it's "weekdays during work hours") - Rate of pay or total amount - Both signatures and date Keep it simple - something like "Jane Smith agrees to provide childcare services for [child's name] from [date] to [date] at a rate of $X per week, totaling $5,000." That's really all you need to establish the business relationship for tax and FSA purposes. The key is showing intentionality that this is paid childcare, not just helping out grandma financially. Save a copy with your tax records and submit it with your FSA claim if requested.

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Emma Wilson

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This is exactly the situation I was in last year! I successfully used my Dependent Care FSA to pay my mom for watching my twins while my wife and I work. The process was surprisingly straightforward once I understood the requirements. A couple of additional tips from my experience: **Payment timing matters** - I found it easier to pay my mom weekly and submit FSA reimbursements monthly rather than waiting until the end of the year. This created a better paper trail and helped spread out the tax impact for her. **Keep a simple log** - I created a basic spreadsheet tracking dates she provided care, hours, and payments made. My FSA administrator never asked for it, but it gave me peace of mind having detailed records. **Talk taxes early** - Make sure your mom understands she'll owe both income tax AND self-employment tax on the $5,000 (roughly 15.3% SE tax plus her regular tax rate). This caught my mom off guard initially, so we adjusted the payment amount to help offset some of her additional tax burden. **Consider quarterly payments** - If your mom doesn't usually make estimated tax payments, she might want to start since she'll have this new income source. The IRS expects taxes to be paid as income is earned, not just at year-end. Your plan is totally legitimate and will work great! Just make sure both you and your mom are prepared for the tax implications on her end.

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Serene Snow

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This is such valuable real-world advice! I'm curious about the quarterly payment suggestion you mentioned. How did your mom figure out how much to pay quarterly? Did she just estimate 25% of the total tax burden, or is there a more specific calculation for self-employment income like this? I'm worried about my mom either underpaying and getting penalized or overpaying and tying up money she needs for other expenses.

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Vanessa Chang

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For quarterly payments, the general rule is to pay 25% of your expected annual tax liability each quarter, but with self-employment income it's a bit more complex. Your mom would calculate the self-employment tax (15.3% on the $5,000 = $765) plus regular income tax on that amount based on her tax bracket. A simple approach: Take the $5,000, multiply by her marginal tax rate plus 15.3% for SE tax. So if she's in the 12% bracket, that's roughly 27.3% total, or about $1,365 in additional taxes for the year. Dividing by 4 quarters = roughly $341 per quarter. However, she only needs to make quarterly payments if she expects to owe $1,000 or more when she files. If her total additional tax burden is less than that, she can just pay it all when filing her return. Also, if she pays at least 90% of this year's tax liability OR 100% of last year's total tax (110% if her prior year AGI was over $150k), she won't face underpayment penalties even if she owes a bit more. I'd recommend she talk to a tax professional for the first year to get the calculations right, then she'll know the pattern for future years.

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QuantumQuasar

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This is exactly what I did with my Dependent Care FSA last year! My mom has been watching my daughter while I work, and I was able to successfully use the full $5,000 from my FSA to pay her. The process was pretty straightforward - I just needed to provide her Social Security Number and address when submitting the reimbursement forms to my FSA administrator. I kept simple records showing the dates she provided care and the amounts I paid her. One thing I wish I had prepared better for was the tax impact on my mom's side. She ended up owing quite a bit more in taxes than expected because of the self-employment tax (15.3%) on top of regular income tax. If I were to do it again, I'd probably increase the payment amount slightly to help her cover that additional tax burden. Also, make sure to treat this as a legitimate business arrangement from day one. I created a simple written agreement outlining the care schedule and payment terms, which helped establish that this was real childcare services rather than just family financial help. Your FSA administrator should accept this without any issues as long as you have the proper documentation. It's a great way to put those FSA dollars to good use while keeping childcare in the family!

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Thanks for sharing your experience! I'm definitely planning to move forward with this arrangement. Your point about increasing the payment amount to help cover the tax burden is really smart - I hadn't thought about that. Quick question: when you created the written agreement, did you specify an hourly rate or just do a flat weekly/monthly amount? I'm trying to figure out the best way to structure the payments to make it look most legitimate while also being fair to my mom for the hours she's putting in. Also, did your FSA administrator ask for any additional documentation beyond the basic reimbursement form, or was providing her SSN and the payment amounts sufficient?

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Zoe Stavros

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I went with a flat weekly amount rather than hourly since my mom's schedule was pretty consistent - she watched my daughter Monday through Friday while I was at work. I calculated it based on roughly $20/hour for about 40 hours per week, which worked out to $800 per week or about $3,200 over the time period I used her services. The flat rate approach made the paperwork much simpler and felt more professional than trying to track exact hours each day. Plus, some days she might stay a bit later or start earlier depending on my work schedule, so the flat rate covered that flexibility. For FSA documentation, my administrator only required the standard reimbursement form with her name, SSN, address, dates of service, and total amount paid. They never asked for the written agreement or any additional proof, but I kept everything just in case. Having that simple agreement gave me confidence that I could explain the arrangement if questioned. The key thing my FSA administrator cared about was that she wasn't my dependent (which she wasn't) and that I had her proper tax information. Everything else was pretty routine for them.

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CosmicCruiser

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This is really encouraging to read! I'm in almost the exact same situation - my mom has been watching my two kids while my spouse and I work, and I have the full $5,000 in my Dependent Care FSA that I originally planned to use for daycare before everything changed. One question I haven't seen addressed yet: does it matter that my mom lives with us? She moved in earlier this year to help with the kids, but I'm wondering if the fact that she's residing in our home affects the legitimacy of paying her for childcare services through the FSA. I know she still qualifies as an eligible provider since she's not our dependent, but I want to make sure the living arrangement doesn't complicate things. Also, for those who have done this - how did you handle documentation for the care provided? Did you need to specify exact hours each day, or was a general "weekday childcare during work hours" sufficient for your FSA administrators? Thanks for all the detailed responses - this community has been incredibly helpful in figuring out how to navigate this properly!

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Hassan Khoury

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The fact that your mom lives with you shouldn't affect the legitimacy of using your Dependent Care FSA to pay her - the IRS rules focus on whether she qualifies as an eligible provider (which she does since she's not your dependent) rather than her living arrangements. However, since she's living in your home, you'll want to be extra careful about documentation to clearly establish this as a business arrangement rather than just providing financial support to a household member. I'd recommend being more detailed in your written agreement - specify the hours she's responsible for childcare, what her duties include, and make it clear these are payments for services rendered, not room and board. For documentation, most FSA administrators accept general descriptions like "weekday childcare during parent work hours" along with the date range. You don't typically need to log exact daily hours unless specifically requested. The key is showing consistent, ongoing care during times when you need it for work purposes. One additional consideration with her living in your home - make sure you're both clear on whether this income affects any other tax situations, like if she's helping with household expenses or if there are any implications for claiming head of household status or other deductions on either of your tax returns.

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Liam O'Sullivan

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Your plan sounds perfectly legitimate! I've actually done this exact same thing with my father-in-law who watches our kids during the week. The IRS rules are clear that as long as the care provider isn't your spouse, the child's other parent, or your dependent under 19, they qualify for FSA reimbursement. A few practical tips from my experience: **Set up a simple payment schedule** - I pay my father-in-law bi-weekly and submit FSA claims monthly. This creates a good paper trail and makes the tax impact more manageable for him throughout the year. **Prepare for the tax conversation** - The $5,000 will be taxable income for your mom, and she'll likely owe self-employment tax (15.3%) plus regular income tax. We calculated this upfront so there were no surprises come tax season. **Keep it professional** - Even though it's family, create a basic written agreement outlining the care schedule, payment terms, and her responsibilities. This helps demonstrate it's a legitimate childcare arrangement if your FSA administrator has questions. **Submit documentation properly** - You'll need her SSN, full name, and address for the FSA reimbursement forms. Most administrators don't require detailed daily logs - a general "weekday childcare during work hours" with date ranges is typically sufficient. This is honestly a win-win situation - you get to use your FSA funds as intended, your mom gets compensated for her time, and your kids get quality care from someone who loves them. Just make sure you both understand the tax implications upfront!

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Ava Williams

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This is such helpful advice! I'm new to both FSAs and navigating family childcare arrangements, so hearing from people who have actually done this successfully is really reassuring. Your point about setting up a bi-weekly payment schedule is smart - I hadn't considered how the timing of payments might affect both the paper trail and the tax impact. One follow-up question: when you created your written agreement with your father-in-law, did you include specific details like meal preparation or light housekeeping that might happen during childcare, or did you keep it focused strictly on childcare duties? I'm trying to figure out how detailed to get without overcomplicating things. Also, did your FSA administrator process the claims pretty quickly, or should I expect some delays since it's a family member providing the care?

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