Can I handle elderly mom's Social Security without being representative payee? POA not recognized by SSA

You're right that SSA doesn't recognize POAs like banks do. Your mom needs to authorize you using SSA's specific forms. There are two main options: 1. Appointment of Representative (Form SSA-1696) - This lets you speak/act on her behalf with SSA without becoming a payee 2. Representative Payee - This is when you receive and manage her benefits directly The 1696 form is WAY easier and probably all you need right now. It doesn't give you control over the payments but does allow SSA to speak with you about her benefits and for you to help with paperwork. For when she passes, you'll need to notify SSA with her death certificate. They'll want the payment from the month of death returned.

OMG I went through this EXACT situation with my dad!!!! SSA was a nightmare to deal with. They wouldn't talk to me AT ALL even though I had POA. So frustrating!!! I finally had to drag my poor dad to the SS office in person (he could barely walk) just to get things sorted out. Such a broken system.

Just to clarify something important - when your mother transitions to Medicaid for nursing home care, her Social Security benefits won't automatically go to the nursing home. What typically happens is: 1. Medicaid will calculate her "patient responsibility" amount 2. She'll be required to contribute most of her income (including SS) toward her care 3. She'll keep a small personal needs allowance (varies by state, usually $30-$70/month) However, the payments still come to her (or her representative payee), and then must be paid to the facility. Medicaid doesn't redirect the SS payment itself. This is why many families eventually need to become rep payees to manage this process.

For the VA side of your question - the VA is actually similar to SSA in not recognizing standard POAs. You need to complete VA Form 21-22a "Appointment of Individual as Claimant's Representative" which lets you communicate with the VA about her benefits. When she passes, you'll need to notify both SSA and VA promptly (ideally within a few days) because payments received after death must be returned. Both agencies typically require a death certificate.

Have you tried calling Social Security about this? I spent HOURS last week trying to get through to a human at SSA for my own benefits question. Always busy signals or disconnections. Then my neighbor told me about this service called Claimyr that got me through to a real person at SSA in under 5 minutes. Saved me so much frustration! You might want to check out their demo at https://youtu.be/Z-BRbJw3puU or go to claimyr.com. They basically get you past the hold times. Might be useful for getting specific answers about your mom's situation.

just a heads up - if ur mom has demencia or similar you should prob just do the payee thing now. my mom has alzheimers and i waited too long, then there was a problem with her payment. ssa wouldnt talk to me AT ALL even tho she couldnt talk on phone. had to get her doctor to fill out forms saying she couldnt manage money. big mess, took 3 months to fix!

If you do decide to become a representative payee, be aware that: 1. You'll need to apply in person at an SSA office with your mom (though in some cases they can do telephone interviews if she can't travel) 2. You'll need to complete Form SSA-11 (Request to be Representative Payee) 3. SSA will evaluate if she needs a payee based on her capacity 4. You'll need to complete an annual Representative Payee Report accounting for how benefits were spent 5. You must keep her funds separate from yours (dedicated bank account) The payee arrangement is more work, but gives you much more authority to manage her benefits, especially important if her condition declines.

my sister works at a nursing home and says they deal with this all the time! they can actually help with the paperwork when someone goes on medicaid. they have social workers who know all the forms and stuff.

One additional consideration - timing matters with Medicaid planning. When your mother transitions to nursing home care and applies for Medicaid, there's typically a 5-year lookback period for asset transfers. This means if you're managing her finances with the POA, be very careful about any gifts or transfers from her accounts, as these could delay Medicaid eligibility. Many families consult with an elder law attorney who specializes in Medicaid planning to navigate this complex process.