Can I handle elderly mom's Social Security without being representative payee? POA not recognized by SSA

You're right that SSA doesn't recognize POAs like banks do. Your mom needs to authorize you using SSA's specific forms. There are two main options: 1. Appointment of Representative (Form SSA-1696) - This lets you speak/act on her behalf with SSA without becoming a payee 2. Representative Payee - This is when you receive and manage her benefits directly The 1696 form is WAY easier and probably all you need right now. It doesn't give you control over the payments but does allow SSA to speak with you about her benefits and for you to help with paperwork. For when she passes, you'll need to notify SSA with her death certificate. They'll want the payment from the month of death returned.

OMG I went through this EXACT situation with my dad!!!! SSA was a nightmare to deal with. They wouldn't talk to me AT ALL even though I had POA. So frustrating!!! I finally had to drag my poor dad to the SS office in person (he could barely walk) just to get things sorted out. Such a broken system.

Just to clarify something important - when your mother transitions to Medicaid for nursing home care, her Social Security benefits won't automatically go to the nursing home. What typically happens is: 1. Medicaid will calculate her "patient responsibility" amount 2. She'll be required to contribute most of her income (including SS) toward her care 3. She'll keep a small personal needs allowance (varies by state, usually $30-$70/month) However, the payments still come to her (or her representative payee), and then must be paid to the facility. Medicaid doesn't redirect the SS payment itself. This is why many families eventually need to become rep payees to manage this process.

For the VA side of your question - the VA is actually similar to SSA in not recognizing standard POAs. You need to complete VA Form 21-22a "Appointment of Individual as Claimant's Representative" which lets you communicate with the VA about her benefits. When she passes, you'll need to notify both SSA and VA promptly (ideally within a few days) because payments received after death must be returned. Both agencies typically require a death certificate.

Have you tried calling Social Security about this? I spent HOURS last week trying to get through to a human at SSA for my own benefits question. Always busy signals or disconnections. Then my neighbor told me about this service called Claimyr that got me through to a real person at SSA in under 5 minutes. Saved me so much frustration! You might want to check out their demo at https://youtu.be/Z-BRbJw3puU or go to claimyr.com. They basically get you past the hold times. Might be useful for getting specific answers about your mom's situation.

just a heads up - if ur mom has demencia or similar you should prob just do the payee thing now. my mom has alzheimers and i waited too long, then there was a problem with her payment. ssa wouldnt talk to me AT ALL even tho she couldnt talk on phone. had to get her doctor to fill out forms saying she couldnt manage money. big mess, took 3 months to fix!

If you do decide to become a representative payee, be aware that: 1. You'll need to apply in person at an SSA office with your mom (though in some cases they can do telephone interviews if she can't travel) 2. You'll need to complete Form SSA-11 (Request to be Representative Payee) 3. SSA will evaluate if she needs a payee based on her capacity 4. You'll need to complete an annual Representative Payee Report accounting for how benefits were spent 5. You must keep her funds separate from yours (dedicated bank account) The payee arrangement is more work, but gives you much more authority to manage her benefits, especially important if her condition declines.

my sister works at a nursing home and says they deal with this all the time! they can actually help with the paperwork when someone goes on medicaid. they have social workers who know all the forms and stuff.

One additional consideration - timing matters with Medicaid planning. When your mother transitions to nursing home care and applies for Medicaid, there's typically a 5-year lookback period for asset transfers. This means if you're managing her finances with the POA, be very careful about any gifts or transfers from her accounts, as these could delay Medicaid eligibility. Many families consult with an elder law attorney who specializes in Medicaid planning to navigate this complex process.

I'm in a very similar situation with my 89-year-old father. Based on my experience, I'd strongly recommend starting with the SSA-1696 form that Ali mentioned - it's been a lifesaver for me. I was able to get it processed without needing to drag my dad to the SSA office (they accepted it by mail with his signature). One thing to add: when you fill out the 1696, make sure to check ALL the boxes for what you want to be authorized to do (receive information, act on behalf, etc.). I initially only checked a few boxes and had to resubmit when I needed broader authorization later. Also, regarding the VA - I found them actually more helpful than SSA once I had the proper forms. The VA Form 21-22a that Declan mentioned worked great, and when I called with questions, they were much more responsive than SSA's phone system. The key thing is getting these authorizations in place BEFORE you need them in a crisis. It sounds like your mom is still competent enough to sign the forms, which makes everything much easier.

I'm dealing with something similar for my grandmother. One thing I learned the hard way - even with the SSA-1696 form, there are still some limitations on what you can do. For example, I couldn't request certain benefit verifications or make changes to her direct deposit without being a representative payee. Also, if your mom ever needs to apply for any new SSA benefits or programs, the 1696 might not be sufficient for that process. But for basic communication and managing existing benefits, it's definitely the way to go. One more tip - keep copies of all the authorization forms with you when dealing with these agencies. I've had representatives ask me to fax or email proof of authorization even when it was already on file. Having it handy saves a lot of time and frustration!

I've been through this exact situation with both my parents! A few practical tips that might help: 1. When you submit the SSA-1696 form, consider doing it in person at your local SSA office if possible - it gets processed faster than mailing it, and you can ask questions on the spot. 2. For the VA Form 21-22a, I found their online portal pretty user-friendly once you get set up. Much easier than dealing with phone calls. 3. Something I wish I'd known earlier: even with these authorization forms, some financial institutions (like pension administrators) may still require their own specific POA forms. Don't assume your general POA will work everywhere. 4. Keep a spreadsheet of all your mom's benefit sources, account numbers, and contact info. When you're juggling SSA, VA, banks, and potentially Medicaid later, having everything organized in one place is a lifesaver. The 1696 route is definitely the right call to start with. You can always upgrade to representative payee later if needed, but you can't go backwards easily. Good luck with everything - this stuff is overwhelming but you're asking all the right questions!

I work at a local SSA field office and wanted to add a few insider tips that might help: 1. The SSA-1696 form is definitely your best starting point, but make sure your mom signs it while she's clearly competent. If there are any questions about her capacity later, SSA may require medical documentation. 2. When you visit the office to submit the 1696, bring two forms of ID for yourself AND your mom's Social Security card or other proof of her SSN. Some offices are stricter about this than others. 3. Pro tip: if you need to call SSA after getting the 1696 processed, always mention up front that you're an appointed representative with a 1696 on file. This saves time and gets you transferred to the right person faster. 4. The annual representative payee reporting that others mentioned is actually not that bad if you keep good records. It's mostly just confirming how much was received and what major expenses were (housing, medical, food, etc.). 5. One thing to consider: if your mom's condition declines significantly, SSA may eventually require a representative payee anyway based on medical evidence, even if you don't request it. The forms-first approach you're taking is smart. Much easier to handle things proactively than in a crisis situation.

As someone who went through this process with my elderly father last year, I'd strongly recommend getting both the SSA-1696 and VA 21-22a forms completed as soon as possible while your mom is still competent to sign them. One thing I didn't see mentioned yet - make sure to ask your mom's assisted living facility if they have a social worker on staff who can help with these forms. Many do, and they're often very familiar with the SSA and VA processes since they deal with residents in similar situations regularly. Also, regarding the Medicaid transition you're worried about - in my experience, the transition was actually smoother than expected because the nursing home's financial coordinator walked us through everything. They knew exactly which forms to file and when, and helped coordinate with both Medicaid and SSA. The key is getting the authorization paperwork done now while she can still sign. I made the mistake of waiting too long and had to rush through the representative payee process when my dad had a medical emergency. Much more stressful than doing it proactively like you're planning to do. You're on the right track - the 1696 form will give you what you need for now, and you can always upgrade to representative payee later if circumstances change.

I've been helping my elderly parents navigate similar issues, and I want to emphasize something that might save you headaches down the road - consider getting a consultation with a certified elder law attorney who specifically handles SSA and VA matters, not just general estate planning. While the 1696 form is definitely the right starting point, an elder law attorney can help you understand the bigger picture of how SSA, VA, Medicaid, and assisted living all interact. They often know shortcuts and specific procedures that can save you months of back-and-forth with these agencies. For example, my attorney told me that in some states, you can get a "limited representative payee" status that's less burdensome than full payee but gives you more authority than the 1696. Also, they can help you time the Medicaid application strategically if your mom does need nursing home care later. The consultation fee (usually $200-400) is worth it to avoid costly mistakes or delays. Many elder law attorneys offer free initial consultations too. Just make sure they specifically work with SSA and VA cases, not just wills and trusts. You're being really proactive about this - your mom is lucky to have someone thinking ahead about these complex issues!