Can you actually enforce something like that legally though? I thought tax benefits were separate from custody agreements?

You absolutely can include tax arrangements in your custody agreement, and the court can enforce it. Many parenting plans specifically address who claims the child in which years (alternating, always one parent, etc). If it's not in your custody order yet, you can still create a separate written agreement. While not as strong as a court order, it's still evidence of your agreement if there's a dispute later. Some parents even use a service like Our Family Wizard to document these agreements, which gives them more weight since the communication is timestamped and can't be altered later.

No, you can't split federal and state. Most states require your filing status and dependents to match your federal return. It would raise red flags if two different people claimed the same kid on federal vs state returns.

What about retirement accounts in foreign countries? I have something similar to a 401k in Australia, and I've heard conflicting things about how the US treats these accounts.

Foreign retirement accounts are one of the trickiest areas for US expats. Unfortunately, unless there's a specific provision in the tax treaty between the US and your country (like there is for Canadian RRSPs), the US often doesn't recognize the tax-deferred status of foreign retirement accounts. For Australian superannuation accounts, they exist in a gray area. Some tax professionals treat them as equivalent to US retirement accounts, others report them as foreign trusts requiring complex reporting, and others treat them as regular investment accounts. Recent IRS guidance has leaned toward treating them as foreign pension plans, but it depends on your exact situation. I recommend getting specific advice on this issue from a tax professional who specializes in US-Australia tax matters, as getting it wrong can have significant consequences.

Thank you for sharing your experience! It's reassuring to hear from someone who's been through the same situation. I was definitely imagining scenarios where I'd be pulled into secondary inspection and questioned about my tax situation! Did you use the Streamlined Filing Procedures that others mentioned? And how long did the whole process take from starting to get compliant until you were fully caught up with the IRS?

Yes, I used the Streamlined Filing Procedures - it was fairly straightforward but took about 3 months from start to finish. I gathered all my foreign tax documents, bank statements, and employment records first (that was the most time-consuming part). Then I worked with a tax preparer who specialized in expat issues to complete the necessary forms. The actual filing involved submitting 3 years of back tax returns along with a statement explaining why I failed to file (I just honestly explained I didn't understand my obligations as a dual citizen living abroad). For the FBAR forms (reporting foreign accounts), I had to file 6 years worth. About 4 months after submission, I received notices confirming everything was processed. I didn't owe any taxes thanks to the Foreign Earned Income Exclusion and Foreign Tax Credits for taxes I'd already paid in the UK.

I actually tried this already but unfortunately the company I worked for in 2018 was bought out in 2020 and the new owner purged a lot of the old records. They told me they only kept the "legally required minimum" which apparently didn't include my 2018 W-2. Really frustrating since this would've been the easiest solution!

That's definitely frustrating! In that case, your next best option is to request a Wage and Income Transcript from the IRS, which will show all reported W-2 information. This is different from the Tax Return Transcript you tried to access online. You can request this specific transcript using Form 4506-T (check box 8 on the form). Even though the online system only goes back to 2020, the IRS can provide Wage and Income Transcripts going back 10 years when requested via mail or fax using this form. This would show exactly what was reported to them on your W-2, including state withholding information.

This is not entirely accurate. While the burden of proof does shift in certain circumstances, the general rule is that taxpayers bear the burden of proving their income, deductions, and credits. If the state is claiming you had income but paid no tax, they usually have some evidence of the income (like W-2 reporting) but are claiming you never filed or paid. The statute of limitations point is valid though - worth checking your state's specific rules.

Thanks for these suggestions! Is the Bittker book still relevant with all the recent tax changes? And I've tried looking at some IRS publications but found them a bit hard to navigate - any tips on how to use them effectively?

The core principles in Bittker's book remain relevant as they explain the foundational concepts that don't change much. For the newest regulations, you'll want to pair it with current IRS publications. For navigating IRS publications, start with the table of contents rather than reading straight through. They're designed as reference materials. Publication 17 has a great index - identify what topics you're interested in and jump to those sections. Also, the IRS website has a "Tax Topics" section that organizes publications by subject matter which makes finding relevant information much easier.

Free resources are great, but they're often overwhelming for beginners. I tried starting with the free stuff and got lost quickly. Sometimes a well-organized book that builds concepts systematically is worth the money.

Can I deduct Spotify if I use it to play music for open houses? Or is that stretching it?

That's actually a good question about Spotify. If you're using it exclusively for business purposes like open houses, you might be able to deduct it. However, if you also use it personally (which most people do), you would need to determine what percentage is for business use and only deduct that portion. Generally speaking, you need to be careful with these "dual-use" subscriptions. The safest approach would be to keep track of how many hours/days you use it specifically for open houses compared to personal use. But honestly, for something relatively small like a Spotify subscription, the record-keeping burden might outweigh the tax benefit.

This is such an important point! My friend went through this exact situation and ended up with a big tax bill because the broker wasn't withholding taxes. What questions should OP ask to make sure they're properly classified?