Social Security widow's benefits confusion - forced to take deceased spouse's lower benefit before my own?

That agent is 100% WRONG. Survivor benefits don't "run out" - they continue for life. And more importantly, you absolutely CAN choose which benefit to take first in your situation. Since your own retirement benefit is higher, the optimal strategy would likely be to take the survivor benefit now and switch to your own retirement benefit at age 70 to maximize it with delayed retirement credits. The survivor benefit would give you income now while your own benefit grows by 8% per year until 70. Based on your numbers, if you wait until 70 to claim your own benefit, it would grow to approximately $3,000/month (a 25% increase from your FRA amount). This strategy could mean tens of thousands of additional dollars over your lifetime.

The SSA agent gave you COMPLETELY wrong information!!! I've been through this exact situation with my own benefits. Survivor benefits NEVER "run out" - they continue for your entire life. And you absolutely DO have a choice. In fact, widows/widowers are one of the FEW groups who still have the ability to choose which benefit to take first and switch later. This is because the "deemed filing" rules that affect most people don't apply to survivor benefits. You should definitely get a second opinion from another agent. I had to talk to THREE different people at SSA before I got the correct information for my own situation. The system is so complicatd that even thier own agents get confused sometimes!!

my mom had this exact problem!!! the first agent told her completely wrong info about her widows benefits. she was so upset. turns out the agent was confusing spousal benefits with survivor benefits which have totally different rules!

I've spent the last 2 years trying to get accurate information from Social Security about my widow's benefits. The misinformation is absolutely incredible. I've called at least 7 times and gotten 5 different answers. When I finally reached someone who actually knew the rules, they explained that widow(er)s have special options that most other beneficiaries don't have anymore. You can absolutely choose which benefit to take first, and the strategy mentioned above is exactly right - take the survivor benefit first, then switch to your own higher benefit later after it's grown. But good luck actually REACHING someone at Social Security who knows what they're talking about! The phone lines are beyond frustrating - I've waited 2+ hours multiple times only to be disconnected. Recently I found a service called Claimyr (claimyr.com) that helped me get through to an actual person at SSA without the ridiculous wait. They have a video showing how it works at https://youtu.be/Z-BRbJw3puU - it saved me hours of frustration when I needed to fix an error on my record.

my aunt went thru something like this. the agent was confusing the rules for spousal benefits with widow benefits. totally different rules! she had to go back 3 times before someone realized the mistake. so frustrating

When you say your husband's benefit "would be $1,850" - is that the actual survivor amount you'd receive, or just what his retirement benefit would have been? Because survivor benefits are either 100% of what the deceased was receiving OR 82.5% of their full retirement amount if they died before claiming (and you claim before your FRA). Just want to make sure you're working with the right numbers for your planning.

Quick follow-up on my earlier response: when you go back to SSA, ask specifically about the "restricted application" for survivor benefits. This is the technical term for what you want to do - restricting your application to ONLY the survivor benefit while letting your own retirement benefit grow. Also, you should know that survivor benefits taken before your Full Retirement Age are reduced for early claiming (unlike switching to your own benefit at 70, which doesn't get penalized). Since you're turning 65 and your FRA is 66 and 10 months, that $1,850 figure already includes the early claiming reduction. If you waited until your FRA to claim the survivor benefit, it would be slightly higher, but that's rarely the optimal financial strategy when your own benefit will exceed the survivor benefit eventually.

this is why i always tell people to do their own research about social security before going in. so many of the workers give wrong info its scary!!