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Social Security spousal benefits and remarriage - will I lose my $1100 if I marry again?

I'm currently receiving about $1100/month in spousal benefits from my ex-husband's record. I've been seeing someone for almost 2 years now and we're talking about getting married, but I'm worried about what will happen to my Social Security benefits. Does anyone know if I'll get spousal benefits from my new husband after we marry? Is there some kind of waiting period before I can collect on his record? And the biggest question - will I immediately lose my current $1100 spousal benefit when we get married or can I keep receiving it until I qualify under my new husband's record? I started taking my benefits early at 62 (I'm 64 now), so I'm already receiving a reduced amount. Really nervous about making a financial mistake here! Any help would be so appreciated.

Be VERY careful! When you remarry, you LOSE ex-spouse benefits immediately! I learned this the hard way when I got remarried at 63. You can't collect on your new husband's record until you've been married for at least ONE YEAR. So there's definitely a gap where you might get NOTHING!!!

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Oh no! That's exactly what I was afraid of. So there's going to be a period where I have no income from Social Security at all? Did you have any way to appeal that or get some kind of hardship exception?

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The previous comment isn't entirely correct. Here's what happens when you remarry: 1. Yes, you will lose your ex-spouse benefit upon remarriage 2. You're correct that there's a one-year duration-of-marriage requirement before you can collect spousal benefits on your new husband's record 3. HOWEVER, you should still be eligible for your own retirement benefits during that gap period if you have enough work credits Since you mentioned you started collecting at 62, you likely have some work history. During the one-year waiting period, you would receive your own benefit amount (which would be less than the spousal benefit you're currently receiving). The key question is: are you currently receiving only the spousal benefit, or are you receiving your own retirement benefit plus a spousal add-on that brings you to the $1100 total?

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Thank you for explaining that! I honestly don't know if I'm getting just spousal benefits or a combination. How would I find out? My SS statement just shows a total amount. I worked part-time most of my life while raising our kids, so my own benefit would be pretty small.

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I went thru almost the exact same thing last year! Remarrying after divorce means you lose ex-spouse benefits immediate. That ONE YEAR waiting period is real too. But I think the important question is how much your new husband's benefit is compared to your ex. If your new husband's SS is higher, you might end up with more after the waiting period. But yeah, there is definitely a gap. I used some savings to cover that year. No exceptions either - I tried!! The SSA is super strict about this stuff.

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That's good to know. My boyfriend's benefit is probably going to be higher than my ex's since he had a higher-paying career. But I'm still worried about that gap year. I don't have much in savings to cover a whole year without that income.

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Just wanted to say congrats on finding love again! That's wonderful! My aunt went through something similar, but I think she waited until after 65 to remarry for some reason related to her benefits. Maybe something to consider?

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Thank you! That's sweet of you to say. Hmm, waiting is an interesting idea. I wonder if there are different rules after full retirement age? I'll have to look into that.

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To answer your question about checking if you're receiving your own benefit plus a spousal supplement or just the spousal benefit: log into your my Social Security account at ssa.gov and view your current benefits. It should break down the components of your payment. One important fact: if you wait until you're full retirement age (66 and some months for your birth year) to remarry, different rules apply. After FRA, you can actually claim ex-spouse benefits even if you remarry! So timing your marriage could make a significant difference. Also, once you've been married to your new husband for a year, you'll be eligible for 50% of his PIA (Primary Insurance Amount) if that's higher than your own benefit. If your new husband's benefit is substantially higher than your ex's, waiting that one year might be worth it financially in the long run.

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Thank you for the detailed explanation! I didn't realize the rules changed if I wait until full retirement age to remarry. That's really important information. I'm going to check my SSA account right now to see the breakdown.

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have u tried calling SSA to ask? i had a q about my benefits last month and it took 3 days of calling to get thru. super annoying but they should be able to tell u exactly what would happen in ur situation

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I've tried calling a few times but keep getting the busy signal or disconnected. I'll keep trying though. I definitely need to talk to someone at SSA directly about my specific situation.

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Just to clarify on the remarriage after FRA (Full Retirement Age) point: If you remarry after reaching your FRA, you can collect benefits on your former spouse's record if your current marriage is to someone who receives Social Security disability, retirement, or survivor benefits. This is a very specific exception that might not apply in your situation. Since you mentioned you're 64 now, you'll reach your FRA in approximately 2-3 years (depending on your birth year). If financially possible, waiting until then to remarry could give you more options.

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Thank you for that clarification. So even with the FRA remarriage, there are still some conditions. This is all so complicated! I'm going to need to do some serious thinking about the timing here.

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Another thing to consider: have you looked into how much your own benefit would be? If you did work part-time throughout your life, you may have enough credits for your own retirement benefit. While it might be less than what you're receiving now as a spousal benefit, it would give you some income during that one-year waiting period if you decide to remarry before FRA.

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This is great advice! I was in a similar situation. After my divorce, I got spousal benefits but when I remarried, I switched to my own benefit during the waiting period. It was about $700 less per month, but at least it wasn't zero income! The key is planning ahead.

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My mom just went thru all this stuff last year. So confusing!!! She ended up postponing her wedding for like 8 months because of all the benefit rules. Social security is so complicated!

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It really is incredibly complicated! I'm thinking postponing might be the smartest option for us too. I just wish they made this easier to understand.

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Have you tried calling the SSA? I spent weeks trying to get through to them when I had questions about my remarriage and benefits. It was impossible - busy signals, disconnections, being on hold for hours. I finally used this service called Claimyr (claimyr.com) that got me connected to an actual SSA agent within 20 minutes. They have a video showing how it works: https://youtu.be/Z-BRbJw3puU. Honestly, for a situation this complicated, you really need to speak directly with SSA about your specific case rather than relying on general advice.

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Thank you for the recommendation! I'll check out that service. You're right that I need to speak directly with SSA about my specific situation. The general information is helpful, but I need to know exactly how this will affect MY benefits.

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ALSO!!! Make sure you talk to your boyfriend about this!!! My friend lost nearly $15,000 in benefits during her "gap year" after remarrying. If I were you, I'd ask the new husband-to-be to help cover that loss since it's happening because of the marriage. Only fair, right???

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That's actually a good point... marriage is supposed to be a partnership and this is a real financial consideration. Having an open conversation about finances before marriage is always smart!

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Based on everything discussed, here's a summary of your options: 1. Remarry now: Lose ex-spousal benefits immediately, possibly receive only your own (likely lower) benefit for one year, then receive 50% of your new husband's PIA if that's higher than your own benefit 2. Wait until FRA to remarry: Potentially keep ex-spousal benefits even after remarriage if your new husband is receiving Social Security benefits 3. Calculate the financial impact: Compare one year of reduced benefits against the long-term higher benefit you might receive based on your new husband's record I'd recommend creating a spreadsheet to calculate different scenarios. This is ultimately a personal decision that involves both financial and emotional factors.

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This summary is incredibly helpful! I'm going to sit down and crunch the numbers for each scenario. Thank you everyone for all the advice - I have a much clearer picture of my options now. Will definitely be consulting directly with SSA before making any decisions.

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