How to find out my ex-spouse's Social Security benefit amount - any legal way?
I'm trying to figure out if I should file for ex-spouse Social Security benefits or just take my own. The problem is I have NO idea what my ex is getting from SS! We've been divorced for 8 years and don't speak at all. I looked all over the SSA website but couldn't find anything that explains how to find out what he's receiving. I know I was married for more than 10 years (15 actually) so I qualify for ex-spouse benefits, but how do I know if that would be better than my own benefit? Is there any legal way to find this information without contacting my ex directly? I'm turning 62 next month and trying to plan.
24 comments


Lily Young
You actually don't need to know what your ex is receiving. When you apply for benefits, you can apply for both your own retirement benefits and divorced spouse benefits simultaneously. SSA will compare the two and pay you whichever amount is higher. They have access to your ex's earnings record and benefit amount - you don't need to provide that information yourself.
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Marcus Williams
•Wait, really?? So I just tell them I want to apply for both and they handle everything? That's such a relief! Do I need to provide anything special about my ex when I apply?
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Kennedy Morrison
my sister went thru this last year. SSA needs ex's name and SSN if u have it, and marriage certificate. they figure out rest. they wont tell YOU what he gets tho!
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Marcus Williams
•Thanks for sharing your sister's experience! I think I still have our marriage certificate somewhere in my files. I might have his SSN written down somewhere too, but I'm not sure. Glad to hear they figure it out!
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Wesley Hallow
I dealt with this exact situation. The SSA won't tell you what your ex receives - that's private information protected by law. However, what you CAN do is file for your own benefits and divorced spouse benefits at the same time. You'll need: 1. Your marriage certificate 2. Divorce decree 3. Ex's name and SSN (if you have it) 4. Your own ID and SSN If you don't have your ex's SSN, SSA can usually still find their record with name, DOB, and parents' names. They'll calculate both benefits and pay you the higher amount. Remember that if you file at 62, you'll get a permanently reduced amount - about 30% less than if you waited until your Full Retirement Age (FRA).
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Marcus Williams
•Thank you for the detailed list! I definitely have the marriage certificate and divorce decree. I'm aware of the reduction for filing early, but I need the income now. Do you happen to know how long the process takes? Should I apply now even though I don't turn 62 until next month?
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Justin Chang
Not only can you NOT legally find out what your ex is receiving, you actually SHOULDN'T try to. SSA guidelines make it clear that attempting to access someone else's benefit information without authorization is potentially a federal offense. But as others have mentioned, you don't need that information anyway. The SSA will do the comparison for you.
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Kennedy Morrison
•geez no need to make it sound like shes committing a crime for asking! shes just trying to plan her retirement!
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Grace Thomas
I tried getting this info a few years back too and got nowhere! Ended up just applying for both like everyone is saying. SSA did all the work but it took FOREVER to process everything. I waited almost 3 months to get approval!
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Wesley Hallow
•Processing times vary significantly depending on your local office's workload. Currently, SSA is taking about 4-6 weeks for straightforward retirement claims, but it can take longer if they need to verify divorce information or if they're having trouble locating your ex's record. It's best to apply 2-3 months before you want benefits to begin.
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Hunter Brighton
If you're having trouble getting through to SSA to start this process, you might want to try Claimyr. I was in a similar situation last year and kept getting disconnected when calling SSA. A friend told me about claimyr.com and they got me connected to an actual agent within 20 minutes. They have a video showing how it works at https://youtu.be/Z-BRbJw3puU. Saved me hours of frustration!
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Marcus Williams
•Oh that's good to know! I've already tried calling SS twice and got disconnected both times after waiting forever. I'll check out that site if I keep having trouble. Thanks!
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Kennedy Morrison
by the way, remember u only get 50% of your ex's benefit MAXIMUM even if u wait till FRA. and if ur own benefit is bigger u just get urs instead
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Grace Thomas
•And that 50% gets reduced more if you claim early! I claimed at 62 and got way less than I expected 😫
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Dylan Baskin
Everyone here is giving you incorrect information!!! You absolutely CAN find out what your ex-spouse gets if you submit form SSA-3288 with their signature authorizing release of information to you. Without that, yes, SSA won't tell you. But the good news is you don't NEED to know - when you apply for benefits, SSA can access both records and determine the higher benefit automatically.
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Wesley Hallow
•With all due respect, you're mistaken about form SSA-3288 in this context. That form requires the ex-spouse's signature authorizing the release of information, which defeats the purpose since OP said they don't speak with their ex. The rest of your information is correct - SSA will compare both benefits and pay the higher amount.
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Marcus Williams
Thanks everyone for the helpful responses! I'm going to gather my marriage certificate and divorce decree, then try to make an appointment with my local office. If I can't get through on the phone I'll try that Claimyr service someone mentioned. It's a huge relief to know I don't need to contact my ex or figure out his benefit amount myself.
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Lily Young
•Good plan! One last tip: you can also apply online at ssa.gov/applyforbenefits which might be easier than trying to get an in-person appointment. Just be sure to specifically mention in the remarks section that you're also applying for divorced spouse benefits and include your ex's name and SSN if you have it.
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Natasha Volkova
Just wanted to add that you should also consider whether your ex has remarried. If he remarried and is still married, you can still collect divorced spouse benefits on his record - it doesn't affect what he or his current spouse receives. But if YOU remarry, you'll lose eligibility for divorced spouse benefits (unless that marriage also ends). Also, make sure you have documentation showing you were married for at least 10 years - SSA is pretty strict about this requirement. Good luck with your application!
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Miguel Castro
•That's a really important point about remarriage! I hadn't thought about how that could affect things. My ex did remarry about 3 years ago, so it's good to know that doesn't disqualify me. And yes, we were married for 15 years so I definitely meet that requirement. Thanks for mentioning the documentation - I'll make sure to have everything ready when I apply!
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Salim Nasir
One thing I'd add that hasn't been mentioned yet - if you're planning to work while collecting benefits at 62, be aware of the earnings test. For 2024, if you earn more than $22,320, they'll reduce your benefits by $1 for every $2 you earn above that limit. This applies until you reach your full retirement age. Just something to factor into your planning since you mentioned needing the income now. The good news is that any benefits withheld due to earnings get added back to your monthly payment once you reach FRA, so it's not permanently lost.
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Andre Laurent
•That's really helpful information about the earnings test! I wasn't aware of those specific numbers. Since I'm still working part-time, I'll definitely need to factor that into my decision. It's reassuring to know that any withheld benefits get added back later rather than being lost forever. This whole thread has been incredibly informative - thank you everyone for sharing your experiences and knowledge!
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Dmitry Volkov
I went through this exact same situation two years ago! The process was actually much smoother than I expected once I understood that SSA handles all the comparison work. I applied online at ssa.gov and it took about 6 weeks to get approved. One tip that really helped me: when you're gathering documents, also look for any old tax returns where you filed jointly - SSA sometimes asks for these to verify the marriage dates if there are any discrepancies with your other documents. I ended up getting the divorced spouse benefit which was about $200 more per month than my own would have been. Don't stress about not knowing your ex's benefit amount - the system really does work without you having to figure that out yourself!
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Mei Wong
•That's so encouraging to hear from someone who went through the exact same situation! $200 more per month makes a real difference. I never would have thought about including old tax returns - that's a great tip about having them ready in case SSA needs to verify marriage dates. It's such a relief to hear that the online application worked well for you and only took 6 weeks. I was worried it might drag on for months. Thanks for sharing your real-world experience - it really helps to know what to expect!
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