Can both ex-wife and current spouse claim Social Security survivor benefits from same deceased husband?
My father just passed away last month and we're trying to figure out the Social Security survivor benefits situation. He was married to my mom for 15 years before they divorced in 1998. Then he married my stepmom in 2001 and they were together until he died (24 years). Both marriages were over 10 years long. My question is: can BOTH my mom (his ex-wife who never remarried) AND my stepmom file for survivor benefits based on his record? The funeral home person mentioned something about this being possible but I'm confused because I thought only one spouse could get survivor benefits. Dad worked his whole life and had a pretty good SS benefit amount. Does anyone know how this works with multiple long-term marriages?
25 comments


Freya Christensen
Yes, both your mother and stepmother CAN potentially receive survivor benefits based on your father's record. This is one of the few situations where Social Security allows multiple people to collect on one person's record. Here are the requirements: - Your mother: Must have been married to him for at least 10 years, be at least 60 years old (50 if disabled), and not currently married (or remarried after age 60) - Your stepmother: As the widow who was married to him at the time of death, she qualifies as long as she's at least 60 (50 if disabled) or caring for his child under 16 Both women would receive their own survivor benefit amount based on your father's Primary Insurance Amount (PIA), their ages when they claim, and other factors. It doesn't reduce either benefit that both are collecting.
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Ravi Malhotra
•Thank you! That makes sense. My mom is 67 and never remarried, and my stepmom is 62, so it sounds like they both qualify. I'll let them both know they should contact SSA. Do they need to apply separately or is there some kind of joint process since it's the same deceased person?
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Omar Hassan
my friend had this EXACT situation!!! both her mom and stepmom got survivors benefits from her dad. they both had to apply seperately and neither one knew about the other one getting benefits until later! SSA doesnt tell them
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Ravi Malhotra
•That's interesting! I wasn't sure if they'd both get approved or if one would somehow block the other. Good to know they each apply on their own.
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Chloe Robinson
I work as a benefits counselor, and this is absolutely correct. Multiple survivors can collect on one worker's record as long as they each qualify under their own circumstances. The key points: 1. Ex-spouse survivor benefits require the 10-year marriage duration, which your mother meets 2. Current spouse survivor benefits have no duration requirement, though your stepmother clearly meets it with 24 years 3. Neither benefit reduces the other - they're calculated separately 4. Each must apply separately (Form SSA-10) 5. Both will need your father's death certificate and their marriage certificates 6. Your mother will also need the divorce decree Both should apply as soon as possible, as benefits are only backdated 6 months from application date at most.
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Diego Chavez
•I had a similar situation but got denied because I remarried at 58. The 'remarried after 60' rule is REALLY important for ex-spouses! Just adding this for others who might be reading this thread. If you remarry before 60, you lose access to your ex's benefits forever, even if the new marriage ends.
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NeonNebula
I went through this with my mom. Getting through to Social Security is NIGHTMARE right now. My mom tried for 3 weeks and kept getting disconnected. She finally used a service called Claimyr (claimyr.com) to get through - they call SSA and when they reach a live agent, they connect you. Saved her hours of frustration. They have a video showing how it works: https://youtu.be/Z-BRbJw3puU Once she got through, the agent was actually very helpful about the survivor benefits process. Make sure both women have all their documents ready when they call - especially marriage and divorce paperwork, as SSA will need to verify both relationships.
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Ravi Malhotra
•Thanks for the tip! I'll check that out. My mom has already tried calling twice and got disconnected both times. She was getting really frustrated.
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Anastasia Kozlov
wait so if a guy has like 5 ex wives who were all married to him for over 10 years they ALL can get survivors benefits??? seems like a loophole lol
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Freya Christensen
•Yes, technically all ex-spouses who meet the requirements (10+ year marriage, appropriate age, not remarried before 60) could receive survivor benefits from the same worker. There's no cap on how many ex-spouses can claim. But remember, the deceased person had to work and pay into the system for many years to earn those benefits, so it's not really a loophole - it's by design.
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Sean Kelly
what you need to know is that survivor benefits can be up to 100% of what he was getting (if claimed at FRA) so tell both of them not to claim early if they dont have to!!!! claiming at 60 means only 71.5% of his benefit forever!!!! big difference
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Ravi Malhotra
•That's really good to know. My stepmom is 62 so maybe she should wait? My mom is already 67 so I guess she's at full retirement age already.
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Freya Christensen
•This is important advice. The survivor benefit reduction schedule is different from retirement benefits: - Age 60: 71.5% of deceased's benefit - Age 61: 76.25% - Age 62: 81% - Age 63: 85.75% - Age 64: 90.5% - Age 65: 95.25% - Age 66 (FRA for survivors): 100% So your mother at 67 would receive 100%, while your stepmother at 62 would only get 81% if she claimed now. However, if your stepmother has significant earnings of her own, she might want to claim survivors now and switch to her own retirement at 70. It depends on their individual situations.
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Diego Chavez
my husband died in january and im STILL waiting for survivors benefit to start!!! applied right away and its been complete chaos. SS kept saying they needed more documents even after i sent everything. so frustrating! make sure they keep copies of EVERYTHING they submit and get names of anyone they talk to!!!
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Omar Hassan
•same thing happened to my cousin! took 4 months to get first payment and then they didnt pay retroactive to the death date like they were supposed to. had to fight for another month to get that fixed. system is broken!!
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Sean Kelly
they both qualify BUT tell them to check if they get more from their OWN ss benefits. survivor benefits only make sense if your dad's amount is bigger than their own. my mom got widows benefits for 2 months until ssa realized her own benefit was $47 more. they switched her automatically
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Chloe Robinson
•Great point. SSA will pay the higher of either their own retirement benefit or the survivor benefit, but not both. Your father's ex-wife and widow should both check their own benefit estimates on my.ssa.gov before applying.
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Zoe Gonzalez
I'm sorry for your loss, Ravi. This is such a complex situation to navigate while grieving. From what I understand, both your mother and stepmother can indeed receive survivor benefits simultaneously - this is one of the unique aspects of Social Security where multiple beneficiaries can draw from the same worker's record without reducing each other's benefits. Since your mom meets the 10-year marriage requirement and never remarried, and your stepmother was married to your father at the time of his death, they each have independent claims. The key is that they'll need to apply separately and provide all the required documentation (death certificate, marriage certificates, divorce decree for your mom). One thing to consider is timing - if your stepmother is only 62, she might benefit from waiting closer to her full retirement age to avoid the reduction in benefits, unless she needs the income now. Your mom at 67 should be able to claim the full survivor benefit amount. I'd recommend both of them create accounts on my.ssa.gov first to check their estimated benefits and see if survivor benefits would be higher than their own retirement benefits. The online portal can also help streamline the application process.
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CosmicCaptain
I'm really sorry for your loss, Ravi. Losing a parent is never easy, and dealing with Social Security paperwork on top of grieving makes it even harder. The good news is that yes, both your mom and stepmother can absolutely receive survivor benefits from your father's record. This is actually more common than people realize. Since your dad was married to your mom for 15 years (well over the 10-year requirement) and she never remarried, she qualifies for ex-spouse survivor benefits. Your stepmother qualifies as the surviving spouse since she was married to him when he passed. A few practical tips from someone who's been through this process: - Both need to apply separately using Form SSA-10 - Have all documents ready: death certificate, marriage certificates, and the divorce decree for your mom - Consider the timing - your mom at 67 can get the full benefit, but your stepmother at 62 would only get about 81% if she claims now - They should both check their own Social Security benefits first on my.ssa.gov to make sure survivor benefits are actually higher The hardest part might be getting through to Social Security by phone. Be patient and persistent, or consider using one of those callback services others mentioned. Both women deserve these benefits - your father earned them through his years of work. Take care of yourself during this difficult time.
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Natasha Petrova
•Thank you so much for this thoughtful response. It really helps to hear from someone who's been through this process. I'm definitely going to have both my mom and stepmom check their own benefits on my.ssa.gov first - that's a great point about making sure the survivor benefits are actually higher. The timing advice is really valuable too. I think my mom should go ahead and apply since she's already past full retirement age, but maybe my stepmom should wait a bit if she can afford to. The 81% vs 100% difference is pretty significant. I appreciate the kind words about dealing with this while grieving. It's been overwhelming trying to figure out all the paperwork and benefits stuff on top of everything else. Your practical tips give me a clearer roadmap for helping them both through this process.
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Salim Nasir
I'm so sorry for the loss of your father, Ravi. This is already such a difficult time, and navigating Social Security benefits adds another layer of stress. The good news is that both your mother and stepmother can indeed receive survivor benefits from your father's record simultaneously. This is one of the few situations where multiple people can draw benefits from the same worker without affecting each other's amounts. Your mother qualifies for divorced spouse survivor benefits since she was married to your father for 15 years (exceeding the 10-year requirement) and never remarried. Your stepmother qualifies as the surviving widow since she was married to him at the time of his death. A few important things to keep in mind: - They must apply separately (Form SSA-10) - SSA doesn't automatically know about both relationships - Required documents: death certificate, marriage certificates, and divorce decree for your mom - Both should first check their own benefit estimates on my.ssa.gov to ensure survivor benefits would be higher than their own retirement benefits - Timing matters: your mom at 67 can receive 100% of the survivor benefit, but your stepmother at 62 would only receive about 81% if she claims now Given the current challenges with reaching SSA by phone, I'd recommend they try the online application process first, or consider using a callback service if they need to speak with someone directly. Your father worked hard to earn these benefits, and both women are entitled to them. Take care of yourself during this difficult process.
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Miguel Ortiz
•Thank you for such a comprehensive and compassionate response, Salim. This is exactly the kind of clear guidance I was hoping to find. The step-by-step breakdown really helps - I didn't realize they could apply online first before trying to call SSA, which might save a lot of frustration. I'm definitely going to have both of them check their my.ssa.gov accounts first to compare their own benefits with potential survivor benefits. The timing consideration is something I hadn't fully understood before reading all these responses. It sounds like my mom should definitely apply soon since she's past full retirement age, but my stepmom might want to weigh whether she can afford to wait a few more years to get closer to 100%. It's reassuring to know that this situation is more common than I thought and that the system is designed to handle it. Your reminder that my father earned these benefits through his hard work really puts it in perspective - both women deserve this support. Thank you again for taking the time to explain everything so clearly during what's been a really overwhelming time for our family.
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Mei Wong
I'm so sorry for your loss, Ravi. Dealing with Social Security paperwork while grieving is incredibly difficult, but you're asking all the right questions. Yes, both your mother and stepmother can absolutely receive survivor benefits from your father's record. This is one of those situations where Social Security actually works in favor of families - multiple survivors can collect without reducing each other's benefits. Here's what you need to know: - Your mom qualifies as a divorced spouse (15-year marriage exceeds the 10-year minimum, and she never remarried) - Your stepmom qualifies as the surviving widow (married at time of death) - Both must apply separately using Form SSA-10 - Each will need: death certificate, their marriage certificate, and your mom will also need the divorce decree Important timing consideration: Your mom at 67 can get 100% of the survivor benefit, but your stepmom at 62 would only get about 81% if she claims now. If your stepmom can wait until her full retirement age (around 66-67), she'd get the full amount. Before applying, both should check their own benefit estimates on my.ssa.gov to make sure survivor benefits would actually be higher than their own retirement benefits. The process can be frustrating with phone wait times, but don't give up. Your father worked hard for these benefits, and both women are entitled to them. Take care of yourself during this difficult time.
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Serene Snow
•Thank you, Mei. This has been really helpful. I think I have a much clearer picture now of what both my mom and stepmom need to do. The timing aspect seems really crucial - it sounds like my mom should definitely apply soon since she's already 67, but my stepmom might want to think carefully about whether she can afford to wait a few more years to get closer to that 100% benefit amount. That 19% difference between claiming at 62 vs full retirement age could really add up over time. I'm going to help both of them create those my.ssa.gov accounts this week to check their own benefits first, then we can move forward with the applications. Thanks for being so thorough and compassionate - it really means a lot during this difficult time.
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Lucy Taylor
I'm deeply sorry for your loss, Ravi. Losing a parent is never easy, and having to navigate Social Security benefits during such a difficult time adds extra stress to an already overwhelming situation. The great news is that both your mother and stepmother can absolutely receive survivor benefits from your father's record simultaneously. This is actually one of the more family-friendly aspects of Social Security - multiple qualified survivors can draw benefits without reducing what the others receive. Your situation breaks down like this: - Your mom qualifies for divorced spouse survivor benefits (married 15 years, which exceeds the 10-year requirement, and never remarried) - Your stepmother qualifies as the surviving widow (married to your father at the time of his death) Both will need to apply separately using Form SSA-10 and provide the necessary documentation: death certificate, their respective marriage certificates, and your mom will also need the divorce decree. One crucial point about timing: your mom at 67 can receive the full 100% survivor benefit, but your stepmother at 62 would only receive about 81% if she claims immediately. If your stepmother can afford to wait until closer to her full retirement age (66-67), she'd get significantly more. Before either applies, I'd strongly recommend they both check their own estimated benefits on my.ssa.gov to ensure the survivor benefits would actually be higher than their own retirement benefits - SSA pays whichever is higher, but not both. Your father earned these benefits through years of hard work, and both women are absolutely entitled to them. Take care of yourself during this process.
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