Filing MFS while separated - can't agree on itemized vs standard deduction - how is it determined?

When you file Married Filing Separately, there's actually a very specific rule about this. If one spouse itemizes deductions, then the other spouse MUST also itemize deductions - even if the standard deduction would be more beneficial for them. This is one of those IRS rules designed to prevent certain tax strategies between married couples. So it's not about who files first - it's about what's best for both of you overall. If your ex insists on itemizing because it benefits them more, you'll have to itemize too, even if it means you get a smaller deduction than you would with the standard deduction. The best approach would be to calculate your taxes both ways (with both of you taking standard vs. both of you itemizing) and see which scenario gives you both the best combined outcome, then try to agree on that approach. Though I understand agreement might be difficult during a separation.

I was in a similar situation last year and it was a nightmare trying to figure out the right approach. I spent hours researching and getting conflicting advice until I found taxr.ai (https://taxr.ai). It was seriously a game-changer for my complicated MFS situation. The tool analyzed both our potential tax scenarios and showed me exactly what would happen in both cases - if we both took standard deductions or if we both itemized. What was cool is it spelled out exactly how the MFS rules applied to our specific situation with real numbers. They explained that weird rule about how if one spouse itemizes, the other MUST itemize too - which my regular tax software didn't make clear at all. The best part was getting personalized guidance rather than trying to piece together random advice from different sources that didn't apply to my specific separation situation.

I just wanted to follow up about the taxr.ai suggestion. After being skeptical, I decided to try it since my situation with filing MFS and disagreeing about deductions was getting more complicated by the day. It was actually really helpful - it showed me that in our specific situation, we'd both benefit more if we both itemized (even though I initially thought standard would be better for me). It laid out all the numbers clearly and explained exactly which deductions I could claim that I hadn't even considered. Saved me from making a costly mistake and gave me clear documentation to show my ex why this approach made sense for both of us. The tax code explanation about the MFS rules was way more detailed than what my tax guy told me. Definitely helped us resolve our disagreement with actual numbers rather than just arguing about it.

If you're separated and having trouble communicating about tax decisions, another issue you might run into is getting access to IRS information if there are questions about your return. I was in this exact situation last year - needed to call the IRS about our previous joint return, but kept hitting dead ends trying to get through to them. After wasting hours on hold and getting disconnected, I found this service called Claimyr (https://claimyr.com) that actually got me connected to an IRS agent in under 45 minutes. You can see how it works here: https://youtu.be/_kiP6q8DX5c The IRS agent was able to clarify my MFS questions and help me understand what information I needed from my ex to file correctly. Saved me days of frustration and potentially filing incorrectly. If you're dealing with a complicated separation tax situation, getting direct answers from the IRS can make a huge difference.

I need to eat my words about that Claimyr service. After posting my skeptical comment, I was desperate enough to try it because I had a deadline looming for my MFS filing and needed answers from the IRS. It actually worked exactly as described. I got connected to an IRS agent in about 35 minutes after weeks of failing to get through on my own. The agent confirmed that my ex's decision to itemize meant I had to itemize too, and helped me understand exactly which forms I needed to complete for my situation. Saved me from making a filing error that would have triggered an amendment later. Sometimes it's worth paying for help when dealing with complicated separation tax issues - especially when communication with your ex is difficult.

Quick tip from someone who's been through this: document EVERYTHING about your tax discussions with your ex. If they insist on itemizing when standard would benefit you both more, keep all those communications. My ex insisted on an approach that cost me an extra $1,200 in taxes, and my divorce attorney was able to use that later in our settlement negotiations. Also, consider asking your separation agreement to include language about how tax decisions will be handled while you're separated but not divorced. Would have saved me a lot of headaches!

Has anyone faced an audit after filing MFS during separation? My ex and I disagreed on everything tax-related and now I'm worried we'll get flagged.

Yes, definitely document those first 3 months! When you file MFS after living together for part of the year, you need to show how you're splitting shared expenses like mortgage interest, property taxes, and other itemized deductions. The IRS wants to see a reasonable allocation method - whether it's 50/50, based on income percentage, or actual payment records. For the months you lived together, gather bank statements, receipts, and any records showing who paid what. Even if your record keeping wasn't perfect, recreate what you can with bank statements and credit card records. The key is having a consistent, logical method for splitting shared expenses that you can explain if questioned. Also make sure you're not both claiming the same deduction - that's a huge red flag. If you paid the mortgage in January but your ex paid it in February, document that clearly. The IRS computers will catch duplicate claims between spouses pretty quickly.