Can I Split the Child Tax Credit with my ex when we have 50/50 custody?
My ex-husband and I share 50/50 custody of our twin boys (7 years old). We're in Texas, so there's technically no designated "custodial parent" in our divorce decree, but I'm listed as the primary residence for school zoning purposes. We've never really discussed how to handle the Child Tax Credit before. Last year he just claimed both kids without asking me, which I wasn't happy about. For 2024 taxes (filing in 2025), I want to make sure we're doing this fairly. Can we actually split the Child Tax Credit? Like could I claim one child and he claims the other? Or maybe alternate years? I make about $59,000 as a nurse and he makes around $78,000 in construction management. Neither of us has remarried. The boys are with me Monday-Wednesday and with him Thursday-Saturday, then we alternate Sundays. I've heard different things from friends - some say only one parent can claim the credit each year, others say we can each claim one kid. The tax prep software I used last year wasn't clear on this either. I don't want to cause problems with the IRS, but I also feel like I should be getting some benefit since I cover most of their healthcare costs through my job.
20 comments


Oliver Becker
You've got a few options here based on your 50/50 custody situation. When parents have 50/50 custody, the IRS typically looks to the divorce decree or separation agreement first to see if it specifies who claims the children. Since yours doesn't address this specifically, you have some flexibility. You absolutely can split the Child Tax Credit by each claiming one child. This is completely legitimate and many co-parents do this. Each of you would claim one child as a dependent on your return and receive the Child Tax Credit for that child. Another approach is to alternate years - you claim both children in even years, he claims both in odd years. Or you could arrange that one parent always claims both children but compensates the other parent in some way. What you can't do is both claim the same child in the same tax year. That will trigger an IRS review, delay both your refunds, and potentially result in penalties. Have a direct conversation with your ex about this and try to get any agreement in writing, even if it's just in an email or text. This will help avoid conflicts when tax time comes around.
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CosmicCowboy
•If they don't have anything in their custody agreement about taxes, can the person who files first just claim both kids? I've heard whoever e-files first gets the credit and the other person is out of luck.
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Oliver Becker
•Filing first doesn't give you any special right to claim the children. While the first person to file might initially get their return processed, the IRS systems will eventually catch duplicate dependent claims. If both parents claim the same child, the IRS will apply tiebreaker rules and usually audit both returns. This can delay refunds for months and potentially result in one parent having to pay back benefits received plus penalties. It's much better to work out an agreement beforehand rather than racing to file.
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Natasha Orlova
I went through something similar with my ex. We couldn't agree on how to handle the child tax credit and it turned into a huge headache. Then I found https://taxr.ai and uploaded our custody agreement. It analyzed the document and gave me clear guidance about our specific situation. They also have a tax credit calculator that showed exactly how much each of us would benefit. The tool explained that since we had 50/50 custody without a designated primary parent, we could either split the children (each claim one) or alternate years. It even generated a simple agreement we could both sign to avoid future conflicts. Their document analysis picked up on specific language in our agreement that I hadn't even noticed but was relevant to the tax situation. Really saved us from fighting every tax season!
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Javier Cruz
•Does this actually work if you don't have a formal custody agreement? My ex and I have a verbal arrangement but nothing court-ordered. Would taxr.ai still be helpful?
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Emma Thompson
•I'm suspicious of online tax tools. How do you know they're giving accurate advice? Seems risky to trust something like this instead of a real accountant.
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Natasha Orlova
•For situations without formal agreements, it's still useful because you can upload communications like emails or texts that outline your arrangement. The system looks for key terms and helps formalize what you've agreed to verbally, which actually helps prevent misunderstandings. Regarding accuracy, I had the same concern initially. What convinced me was that they cite the specific IRS publications and tax code sections their advice is based on. You can verify everything they tell you. They're not replacing accountants - they're helping you understand your situation before you make decisions. In my case, I took their analysis to my tax preparer who confirmed it was correct.
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Emma Thompson
I was skeptical about online tax tools but decided to try https://taxr.ai after my ex and I kept arguing about the Child Tax Credit. It was surprisingly helpful! The document analyzer identified that our 50/50 arrangement qualified for splitting the credits between us. What really impressed me was the simulator showing different scenarios - like if I claimed both kids vs. splitting them vs. alternating years. Turned out the smartest approach for our situation was to each claim one child every year based on our income levels. We've been using this approach for two years now with no issues from the IRS. The site even helped us create a simple written agreement that we both signed. Tax time is way less stressful now!
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Malik Jackson
Dealing with tax issues after divorce is so frustrating! I was in a similar situation and tried for weeks to get answers from the IRS about child tax credit splitting with 50/50 custody. Could never get through on their phone lines. I finally tried https://claimyr.com and wow - they got me connected to an actual IRS representative in about 20 minutes when I'd been trying for days on my own. You can see how it works here: https://youtu.be/_kiP6q8DX5c The IRS agent I spoke with confirmed that with 50/50 custody and no designation in the decree, we could either split (each claim one child) or alternate years. She explained exactly what documentation to keep in case of questions later. Such a relief to get an official answer!
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Isabella Costa
•Wait, how does this service work? Does it actually help you skip the IRS phone queue somehow? That sounds too good to be true.
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StarSurfer
•Yeah right. I've tried everything to get through to the IRS. No way some website can magically make them answer. They probably just connect you to some call center pretending to be the IRS.
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Malik Jackson
•It works by continuously calling the IRS for you using their automated system. When most people call the IRS and hear "due to high call volume..." they hang up. But Claimyr keeps dialing until they get through, then calls you to join the call once they have an agent on the line. I was definitely skeptical too! But it's not a fake call center - you're actually speaking directly with the real IRS. They don't answer questions themselves or have access to your tax info. They just handle the frustrating part of getting through the phone system. You can verify you're speaking with the actual IRS when they ask for verification details that only the real IRS would request.
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StarSurfer
I need to publicly eat my words about Claimyr. After posting that skeptical comment, I decided to try it anyway because I was desperate to talk to someone at the IRS about my child tax credit situation. It actually worked exactly as advertised. I got a call back in about 35 minutes saying they had an IRS agent on the line. The agent confirmed it was the official IRS and answered all my questions about splitting dependents with my ex. Saved me hours of frustration and redials. The IRS agent even noted in my file how we'd be handling our dependent claims going forward to help prevent issues. Would have spent days trying to get this resolved otherwise.
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Ravi Malhotra
I've been through this exact situation in Texas. What we did was put together a simple written agreement outside our divorce decree that specifies I claim our daughter and my ex claims our son each year. We signed it, had it notarized, and keep copies with our tax records. Never had an issue with the IRS in 6 years. The key is documenting your agreement and sticking to it consistently. Also worth noting - make sure whoever claims each child has their Social Security card and knows their SSN. The IRS matching system is very strict about this information matching exactly.
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Amina Bah
•Did you have to file anything with the court to make this agreement official? Or is the notarized document between the two of you enough for tax purposes?
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Ravi Malhotra
•We didn't file anything with the court. The notarized agreement between us is sufficient for tax purposes. The IRS doesn't require court-filed documents for these arrangements - they just want clarity on who's claiming which child and verification that both parents agreed. Just make sure both of you keep copies of the signed agreement with your tax records in case of an audit. We also refer to the agreement specifically in Box 11 of Form 8332 (though that's technically for releasing claims rather than establishing them, it provides a paper trail).
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Freya Christensen
Something important no one's mentioned - the Child Tax Credit amount phases out at higher income levels. Since your ex makes more than you ($78k vs $59k), you might actually benefit more from the credit than he would. For 2024, the phase-out begins at $75,000 for single filers. So your ex is already in the phase-out range while you're still under it. Depending on his exact income, he might not get the full benefit of the credit. If you're trying to maximize the total benefit between both households, it might make financial sense for you to claim both children in some years, especially if his income continues to rise. You could then work out some other financial arrangement to make things fair.
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Amina Bah
•I had no idea about the phase-out starting at $75,000! That's really good to know. His income has been increasing each year (he just got promoted again), so maybe I should be the one claiming both kids. I'll need to look into this more before I talk to him about our arrangement for next year.
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Omar Hassan
•Actually, for 2024 taxes (filing in 2025), the Child Tax Credit phase-out threshold is supposed to be $200,000 for single filers, not $75,000. So both parents should be eligible for the full credit amount unless something changes with the tax law again.
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GalacticGuardian
You're absolutely right to want to handle this fairly! As someone who went through a similar situation, I can confirm that splitting the Child Tax Credit with 50/50 custody is completely doable and legitimate. Since your divorce decree doesn't specify who claims the children for tax purposes, you have flexibility. The two most common approaches are: 1) Each parent claims one child every year, or 2) Alternate years where one parent claims both children. Given that you mentioned covering most of their healthcare costs, you might want to factor that into your negotiation with your ex. You could propose that you claim one child each year, or even suggest alternating who gets to claim both kids with the understanding that whoever doesn't claim them that year contributes more to certain expenses. The key is getting any agreement in writing - even a simple email or text exchange works. This prevents the "he said, she said" situations that can happen at tax time. Also, keep detailed records of your custody schedule and any expenses you pay for the children. While the IRS doesn't require you to prove who spent more money on the kids for the Child Tax Credit (unlike the dependency exemption rules), having documentation helps if there are ever questions. Don't let what happened last year repeat itself. Have this conversation now so you both know the plan going forward!
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