ESD hearing with Judge Molly Ray - quit job to care for disabled children - need advice
I'm stressing about my upcoming ESD hearing on Thursday with Judge Molly Ray. I voluntarily quit my warehouse position to be a full-time caregiver for my two sons who have special needs - my 9-year-old has ADHD and my 12-year-old has both autism and ADHD. My previous employer couldn't accommodate the flexible schedule I needed for therapy appointments and school emergencies (was getting called 2-3 times weekly to pick up my oldest). I've gathered their IEPs, medical diagnosis documentation, and a letter from their specialist explaining why they require additional supervision. But I'm worried because I know voluntary quits are usually disqualified. Has anyone been through a similar hearing with Judge Ray? Any advice on how to present my case for good cause to quit? Should I emphasize the financial hardship of paying for specialized childcare versus what I was earning?
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Dana Doyle
I had a hearing with Judge Ray last year (different situation - fired for attendance). She's actually pretty fair compared to some other judges. Make sure you organize your documents in chronological order and have clear copies of everything. Write down a timeline of events showing how your work schedule conflicted with your kids' needs. When she asks questions, answer DIRECTLY - don't ramble or go off topic. She appreciates when people are prepared and straightforward.
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Darcy Moore
•Thank you! That's really helpful. Did you have an advocate or attorney with you or did you represent yourself?
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Liam Duke
u should definitely mention if u tried asking for accommodations from ur employer before quitting!! thats super important. judges want to hear that u tried to resolve the situation first before just walking away
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Darcy Moore
•Yes, I did request a modified schedule or even part-time hours but they said it wasn't possible with my position. Should I bring emails or anything showing those conversations?
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Manny Lark
I'm an employment counselor and have helped clients prepare for similar hearings. For your specific situation, RCW 50.20.050(2)(b)(ii) allows benefits if you quit to care for an immediate family member with a disability that requires your care. The key is demonstrating that: 1. Your children's conditions meet the definition of disability 2. No reasonable alternative care arrangement was available 3. You made reasonable efforts to preserve your employment before quitting Bring documentation of all daycare/childcare options you investigated and their costs/availability for special needs children. Also get statements from the children's doctors specifically stating they require parental care. Judge Ray will want to see that you exhausted all alternatives before quitting.
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Darcy Moore
•This is exactly what I needed! I didn't know about that specific RCW section. I'll get statements from their physicians specifically addressing why they need parental care. Thank you so much!
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Rita Jacobs
Judge Ray denied my claim last June and was super mean about it. She kept interrupting me and wouldn't let me finish explaining my situation. Good luck but don't get your hopes up with her!!!
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Dana Doyle
•That hasn't been my experience with her at all. I think it depends on how prepared you are and if you stick to the relevant facts. Judges don't want long emotional stories - they want clear evidence that matches the law.
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Khalid Howes
Having tried to reach ESD multiple times before my own hearing, I finally had success using a service called Claimyr (claimyr.com). They helped me get through to an actual ESD agent who explained exactly what documentation I needed for my hearing. Saved me tons of stress! They have a video demo showing how it works: https://youtu.be/7DieNd3C7zQ?si=26TzE_zGms-DODN3. Might be worth checking out before Thursday so you can ask specific questions about your case.
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Ben Cooper
•is that service legit? seems kinda sketchy to pay just to talk to ESD when its supposed to be free
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Khalid Howes
•It's definitely legit. I was skeptical too but after spending 3 weeks trying to get through on my own with no success, it was worth it. They don't replace ESD - they just help you skip the phone queue. The agent I spoke with gave me specific advice for my hearing that made a huge difference.
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Naila Gordon
I went thru almost the EXACT same situation last year!!! My son has autism and my employer wouldn't work with my schedule for his therapy appointments. My hearing was with a different judge but I WON my case! The key thing that helped me was having detailed documentation of: 1) Every time I had to leave work for my child (dates & reasons) 2) All the times I requested schedule accommodations (BRING EMAILS!) 3) Letters from BOTH my son's doctor AND therapist 4) Research showing the cost of specialized care was more than I made hourly Be calm and organized. Practice what you'll say beforehand so you don't get emotional during the hearing (I cried during mine and it made it harder to explain things clearly).
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Darcy Moore
•This is so reassuring to hear! I'll definitely gather those exact documents. Did you have your hearing by phone or in person? Mine is scheduled as a phone hearing.
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Naila Gordon
•Mine was by phone. Make sure you're somewhere quiet where you won't be interrupted! I had all my documents spread out on my kitchen table with sticky notes so I could quickly reference things. Also, take notes during the hearing of anything you want to address later when it's your turn to speak.
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Dana Doyle
For what it's worth, I think documented special needs of children is one of the stronger voluntary quit justifications with ESD. Just make sure you emphasize that it was IMPOSSIBLE to continue working there (not just difficult or inconvenient). The legal standard is pretty strict.
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Ben Cooper
my cousin quit to take care of her sick mom and got denied because she didnt have enough proof that nobody else could do it. make sure u can show you really tried EVERYTHING else first
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Darcy Moore
Update: Had my hearing today and Judge Ray was fair and professional. She asked specific questions about my childcare attempts and why my children needed my direct care. I presented my documentation including the doctor statements about why my children need parental care due to their specific conditions, records of school incidents, and emails showing I tried to get accommodations at work. She said she'd mail the decision in 10-14 days but seemed sympathetic to my situation. Thanks everyone for the advice - being prepared with everything organized made a huge difference!
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Naila Gordon
•That sounds promising! Fingers crossed for you! Please let us know when you get the decision!
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Manny Lark
•Good job being prepared. That organization and documentation is exactly what judges need to rule in your favor. The law does allow for your circumstances, it's just a matter of properly demonstrating that you meet all the criteria.
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Ellie Perry
Glad to hear your hearing went well! The fact that Judge Ray seemed sympathetic is definitely a good sign. I've been following your situation since you first posted and it sounds like you did everything right - having all that documentation organized and being able to clearly explain why you exhausted other options before quitting was key. The wait for the decision is always nerve-wracking but based on what you've shared, you presented a strong case that fits the legal requirements for good cause. Hope you get good news soon!
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