Can I collect Social Security from my ex-spouse if I remarry? Confused about remarriage rules

The remarriage rule is actually pretty straightforward but often misunderstood. If you remarry BEFORE age 60, you cannot collect benefits on your ex-spouse's record while you remain married to your new spouse. If you remarry AFTER age 60, you can still collect divorced spouse benefits based on your ex's record. Since you're 58 now, if you remarry before turning 60, you'll lose eligibility to claim on your ex-husband's record. You'll only be able to claim on your new husband's record (if eligible) or your own. If this matters a lot financially, you might consider waiting until after your 60th birthday to remarry. Then you preserve your options.

Who cares about the rules, they're gonna change them again anyway before we can collect ANYTHING! My sister in law waited to remarry until 60 for EXACTLY this reason and then got a letter saying they CHANGED the rules and she was no longer eligible anyway!!! The whole system is a SCAM designed to take our money and then change the rules when it's time to pay out!!!

my mom had this same question last year lol. she waited til 60 to marry her bf of 12 years just to keep her ex's benefits. they had a big party for both the wedding and her 60th bday on the same weekend it was fun

The previous advice is correct, but let me add some important details: 1) To claim on an ex-spouse's record, your marriage must have lasted at least 10 years (yours was 15, so you qualify) 2) You must be unmarried OR remarried after age 60 3) You must be at least 62 to collect divorced spouse benefits 4) Your ex doesn't need to be collecting yet, but must be eligible for benefits 5) The maximum you can receive as a divorced spouse is 50% of your ex's full retirement age benefit So even if you wait until after 60 to remarry, remember you still can't actually collect until you're 62. And if you collect before your own full retirement age (probably 67 for you), your benefit will be reduced permanently. Finally, if your new husband's benefit would be higher than your ex's, you'd get the higher amount anyway, so the remarriage rule might not matter in your case.

Everyone here is forgeting that if u remarry somebody who also gets SS benefits you might get more that way anyway so the ex spouse thing mite not even matter for you. My aunt remarried at 59 and was worried but then her new husbands benefit was way higher than her ex's so it didn't matter anyway!!

I was in almost the exact same situation last year! I called SSA dozens of times trying to get through to ask this question and kept getting disconnected or waiting for hours. I finally used a service called Claimyr (claimyr.com) that got me connected to an SSA agent in about 20 minutes. They have a video showing how it works here: https://youtu.be/Z-BRbJw3puU The agent confirmed everything people are saying here - remarriage before 60 means you lose ex-spouse benefits, after 60 you can still claim them. They also helped me calculate the different benefit amounts so I could make an informed decision. Definitely worth getting the official word from SSA on your specific situation.

Just wondering - has anyone here actually gone through with collecting on their ex's record after remarrying past 60? How complicated was the process? Did SSA give you any trouble?

i think u can stil collect widows benefits from a dead ex spouse even if u remarry after 60 too its not just for divorsed spouse benefits

Thanks everyone for all the helpful information! I think I understand better now. My plan is to: 1. Try to contact SSA to get exact benefit estimates (using that Claimyr service someone mentioned) 2. Talk to my boyfriend about our long-term plans and his benefit status 3. Consider waiting until after my 60th birthday to get married if it makes financial sense It's frustrating that something like when I get married could have such a big impact on my financial future, but I'd rather make an informed decision than regret it later.

I'm dealing with a very similar situation! I'm 56 and have been with my partner for 3 years. My divorce was finalized 2 years ago after a 12-year marriage. Reading through all these responses has been incredibly helpful - I had no idea about the age 60 rule for remarriage. One thing I'm curious about that I haven't seen mentioned: does the timing of when your ex-spouse starts collecting their benefits affect your ability to claim on their record? My ex is 2 years older than me and might start collecting early at 62. Would that impact my options at all? Also, has anyone had experience with getting benefit estimates from SSA? I've been hesitant to call because of the long wait times, but it sounds like having those actual numbers would really help with planning.

I'm in a somewhat similar situation but with a twist - I'm 59 and my ex-husband passed away last year. We were married for 13 years before divorcing 6 years ago. I'm now engaged and planning to marry in about 8 months (when I'll be 60). From what I'm reading here, it sounds like I should still be able to collect survivor benefits from my deceased ex-husband even after remarrying at 60? The rules seem to be the same as for divorced spouse benefits regarding the age 60 remarriage threshold. Has anyone dealt with survivor benefits from an ex-spouse specifically? I'm wondering if the process or requirements are different from regular divorced spouse benefits. My ex had a much higher earning record than I do, so this could make a significant difference in my retirement planning. Also, @Zoe Kyriakidou, I really appreciate you starting this thread - it's been so helpful to see everyone's experiences and advice in one place!

@Ali Anderson, you're absolutely correct about the remarriage rules applying to survivor benefits too! And congratulations on your upcoming marriage. One important distinction with surviving divorced spouse benefits that wasn't mentioned yet: you can potentially start collecting them as early as age 60 (compared to age 62 for regular divorced spouse benefits), though they'll be reduced if you take them before your full retirement age. Since you'll be 60 when you remarry, you could theoretically apply for these benefits right away if needed. The benefit amount for survivors is indeed much better - potentially up to 100% of what your ex-husband was receiving or entitled to receive, rather than the 50% maximum for divorced spouse benefits. Given his higher earnings, this could be substantial. I'd definitely echo the advice to get official estimates from SSA before your wedding. Since survivor benefits can start at 60 and you're remarrying right at that age, you'll want to understand your options for timing - whether to apply immediately at 60 (reduced benefits) or wait until your full retirement age for the maximum amount. The timing of your remarriage actually works out perfectly to preserve all your options while still allowing you to marry when you planned. Best wishes!

I've been following this discussion and wanted to share some additional resources that might help everyone here. For those struggling to get through to SSA by phone, you can also visit your local Social Security office in person - sometimes it's faster than waiting on hold for hours. You can find your nearest office at ssa.gov/locator. I'd recommend calling ahead to see if they require appointments, as some offices have shifted to appointment-only since COVID. Also, if you're trying to get benefit estimates, the online "my Social Security" account at ssa.gov is really helpful for seeing your own projected benefits, though as others mentioned, it won't show you what you might be eligible for from an ex-spouse's record. One more tip: if you do end up calling SSA, try calling right when they open at 7 AM local time - the wait times are usually much shorter in the morning. I've had good luck getting through within 15-20 minutes that way versus hours during peak times. The remarriage timing decisions you're all discussing are so important financially - it's worth the effort to get the official numbers to make informed choices!