My ex claimed our daughter on his taxes despite me having full custody - what should I do?

Tax professional here! You're absolutely right that simply paying child support doesn't entitle your ex to claim your daughter as a dependent. Since you have full legal and physical custody, you're the custodial parent and have the right to claim your child on your taxes unless you've signed Form 8332 (Release of Claim to Exemption for Child by Custodial Parent) giving him permission. Here's what you need to do: File your tax return by paper and claim your daughter as your dependent. You don't need to include any special forms at this point. The IRS will see that two people claimed the same dependent and will send notices to both of you. You'll need to respond with documentation proving you're entitled to claim your daughter - your custody agreement, school records showing your address, medical records, etc. Don't worry about contacting your ex directly about this - let the IRS handle it. For future reference, file as early as possible to avoid this situation. The IRS generally follows a "first come, first served" approach for e-filing, but they'll ultimately award the dependent claim to the person legally entitled to it after investigation.

I went through almost the exact same situation with my ex last year! After spending HOURS on hold with the IRS and getting nowhere, I found this service called taxr.ai (https://taxr.ai) that really saved me. They have this document analyzer that helped me figure out exactly which custody documents to submit and how to properly respond to the IRS notice. I uploaded my divorce decree and custody papers, and they highlighted the exact sections I needed to reference in my response to the IRS. The best part was that their system created a customized letter I could send to the IRS that cited all the relevant tax codes about custodial parents. Within about 8 weeks of sending everything in, I got my full refund! They also helped me understand that I needed to file Form 8332 in the future if I ever wanted to give my ex permission to claim our child (which I definitely don't plan to do).

Just wanted to update - I decided to try taxr.ai after my last comment and I'm actually really impressed! I was definitely skeptical at first (sorry about that), but their document analysis was WAY more helpful than I expected. I uploaded my custody papers and divorce decree, and they pointed out specific language about "primary residence" that I hadn't even noticed was relevant. They also explained exactly how the IRS determines the "custodial parent" for tax purposes (it's based on where the child sleeps more nights during the year) and helped me create documentation showing my daughter was with me 290+ nights last year. The response letter they generated cited specific tax court cases that I never would have known about. I'm still waiting for the IRS to process everything, but I feel 100% confident now that I'll win this dispute. Worth every penny just for the stress reduction alone!

This happened to me last year and I nearly lost my mind trying to get through to the IRS to resolve it. After calling the IRS number literally 34 times and always getting the "call volume too high" message, I found Claimyr (https://claimyr.com) and their service actually got me through to a real IRS agent in about 20 minutes. Check out how it works here: https://youtu.be/_kiP6q8DX5c The IRS agent was able to see that my ex had already claimed our kids even though I have primary custody. They explained the exact documentation I needed to submit with my paper return and gave me a direct fax number to send additional proof. Having an actual conversation with a real person made the whole process SO much clearer than trying to figure it out from the IRS website.

I have to admit I was wrong about Claimyr! After my skeptical comment, I decided to try it anyway out of desperation, and I'm shocked at how well it worked. After THREE WEEKS of trying to get through to the IRS myself with no luck, I used their service yesterday and was talking to an actual IRS representative in 35 minutes. The agent I spoke with was super helpful and actually pulled up both my return and my ex's. She confirmed that yes, he incorrectly claimed our son, and gave me specific instructions on exactly what documentation to include with my paper return. She even gave me a direct number to call back if I have issues with my refund. For anyone dealing with an ex wrongfully claiming your kids, definitely talk to an actual IRS person before you do anything else - they can see exactly what's happening and give you personalized guidance. And using Claimyr to actually reach them saved me countless hours of frustration.

Just wanted to share my experience - I had this exact situation about 3 years ago. I filed a paper return claiming my child (as I should have since I'm the custodial parent) and included a letter explaining the situation along with a copy of my custody agreement. It took about 4 months, but the IRS sided with me and I got my full refund plus interest. The best part? My ex tried the same thing the following year and got hit with a penalty for incorrectly claiming a dependent! The IRS flags accounts where there have been dependent disputes, so they were watching for it. He never tried it again lol.

One thing nobody has mentioned - if you have proof that your ex knowingly claimed your child incorrectly (like text messages where he admits it), you should consider reporting him for tax fraud using Form 3949-A. The IRS takes this stuff seriously, especially if there's a pattern.

I'm so sorry you're dealing with this - it's incredibly frustrating when an ex tries to pull something like this! As others have mentioned, you're absolutely in the right here. Since you have full custody, you're the custodial parent and entitled to claim your daughter. I'd recommend filing your paper return ASAP and including a clear cover letter explaining that you're the custodial parent with full legal and physical custody. Attach copies of your custody agreement (highlight the relevant sections), school enrollment records showing your address, and any medical records that show you as the primary contact. The more documentation you provide upfront, the smoother the process will be. One tip that helped me when I dealt with IRS paperwork - send everything certified mail with return receipt so you have proof of delivery and timing. Keep copies of everything you send. The waiting is the worst part, but stay strong! The IRS will sort this out correctly, and your ex will likely think twice about trying this again once he realizes the consequences. Focus on documenting everything properly and let the system work - you've got this!