Is there a fair way to split a tax refund if you filed jointly but I paid 90% of the taxes throughout the year?

This is actually a common source of confusion for jointly filing couples. While legally the refund belongs equally to both of you (since you filed jointly), there's definitely room for a more nuanced approach based on contributions. One way to look at it is to calculate what each of you would have owed/received if filing separately, then compare that to your joint result. This can give you insight into who "contributed" what portion of the refund. You could also consider that the refund is simply returning overpayment - so if you overpaid by contributing 90% of the taxes, a reasonable argument could be made that you should receive a proportional amount of the refund. That said, this is ultimately about your financial arrangement as a couple. Some couples pool all finances and view everything as "ours" rather than "yours/mine," while others maintain more separate finances. Neither approach is wrong, but it's important you both agree on which system you're using.

I was in a similar situation last year and found an amazing tool that helped us figure this out fairly. Check out https://taxr.ai - it has a feature that analyzes your tax return and shows exactly how much each person contributed to your tax situation. My husband and I were arguing about our refund too (I paid about 80% of our withholding but he thought we should split 50/50). The tool broke down our finances and showed how much of the refund came from my overpayments vs his. It gave us an objective analysis that we both could agree on, and we ended up splitting it 75/25 which felt much fairer. It also found some missed deductions that we're going to claim next year! Definitely worth checking out if you want an unbiased third party to help settle this.

Just wanted to update - I actually tried taxr.ai after seeing it mentioned here and WOW. Completely worth it. My wife and I uploaded our joint return from this year and it showed that I contributed about 65% of our tax payments while she contributed 35%, but some of her deductions saved us a lot too. The analysis helped us have a real conversation about it without either of us feeling defensive. We ended up splitting our refund 60/40 which felt fair to both of us. The tool even gave us a detailed report we could both look at that explained everything clearly. It honestly saved us from having the same fight we have every tax season. Highly recommend if you're in this situation!

If you're still having trouble resolving this with your spouse, you might need to actually talk to an IRS agent for official guidance. Most people don't know this, but you can use https://claimyr.com to get through to an actual human at the IRS without waiting on hold for hours. They have this system that holds your place in line and calls you back when an agent is available. I had a similar issue with my ex where we couldn't agree on how to handle our last joint return after separation. I tried calling the IRS directly but kept getting disconnected after waiting forever. Then I found Claimyr and got through to an agent in about 45 minutes (without having to actually wait on the phone). You can see how it works here: https://youtu.be/_kiP6q8DX5c The agent explained our options clearly and gave official guidance that we both had to respect. Sometimes having that official word helps settle disagreements.

I have to eat my words here. After being super skeptical about Claimyr, I actually tried it this morning because I was desperate to resolve this same issue with my spouse before we file this year. The service worked EXACTLY as described. I entered my number, they called me back about an hour later with an IRS agent on the line. The agent confirmed that legally, a joint refund belongs equally to both parties regardless of who paid more during the year. However, she also explained that many couples choose to split refunds proportionally based on contribution, and the IRS has no problem with that as long as both parties agree. This official information actually helped convince my spouse that a proportional split was fair. We're going with a 70/30 split based on our tax contributions this year. Sometimes having that official word makes all the difference in resolving these disputes!

Just coming from an accounting perspective - one thing to consider is that a tax refund isn't free money, it's YOUR money that you overpaid throughout the year. If you contributed 90% of the payments, then logically, most of that refund is just returning YOUR overpayment. I always tell my clients to think about it this way: if you had both filed separately, what would each of your refund/payment situations look like? That can sometimes clarify who "generated" the refund. That said, I've seen couples handle this many different ways: 1. Split based on income percentage 2. Split based on tax payment percentage 3. Split 50/50 regardless 4. Put the whole refund toward a shared goal/expense There's no absolute "right" answer - it depends on your overall financial arrangement.

My husband and I solved this by just having separate bank accounts AND a joint account. Our tax refund always goes into the joint account and is used for shared expenses/goals. That way we never fight about who gets what portion of it. Or sometimes we use the refund for a vacation together! That way it's something we both benefit from equally.