Drowning in self-employment back taxes - need advice on digging out
I can't take it anymore. The stress and anxiety from these back taxes are completely overwhelming me and taking over my life. About 3 years ago, I started my first independent contractor position with a tech consulting firm. It was my first time making real money, but also my first experience with self-employment taxes. I had no idea I needed to set aside roughly 30% of my income for taxes. Long story short, I got behind by around $27,000. I set up a payment plan with the IRS for $625 a month, but the interest seems to be eating up most of my payments. After a year of payments, the balance has barely budged. To make matters worse, I underestimated my quarterly payments again and now owe another $19,000 on top of everything else. I'm now sitting on approximately $40,000 in back taxes. I feel like such a failure. I have a wife and two elementary-aged kids, and I worry I've completely ruined our financial future. All because I didn't understand how self-employment taxes worked. The amount I owe gives me panic attacks, and I'm constantly stressed about how I'll ever pay this off. Everyone keeps telling me different things, but I'm completely lost on what to do next. Has anyone been in a similar situation or have advice on getting out from under this?
20 comments


Jeremiah Brown
I've helped several clients through similar situations with self-employment tax debt, so please don't beat yourself up too much. This is actually quite common for first-time contractors. First, you might want to look into an Offer in Compromise (OIC), which allows you to settle your tax debt for less than the full amount. The IRS evaluates your ability to pay based on income, expenses, asset equity, and future earning potential. Not everyone qualifies, but it's worth exploring. Second, consider requesting a temporary delay in collection. If you can demonstrate financial hardship, the IRS may temporarily classify your account as "currently not collectible," giving you some breathing room. Another option is an installment agreement with terms that actually work for your situation. The $625 payment plan you set up might not be optimized for your specific circumstances. The IRS offers various payment plans with different terms. Finally, make sure you're properly handling your current tax obligations through quarterly estimated payments to prevent digging a deeper hole.
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Royal_GM_Mark
•Thank you for this helpful comment. I'm wondering about the Offer in Compromise - does it hurt your credit score? And how likely is it to get approved? I've heard the IRS rarely accepts these.
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Jeremiah Brown
•An OIC doesn't directly impact your credit score like a credit card default would. The IRS doesn't report to credit bureaus the same way lenders do. However, there is a public tax lien that might be visible until the offer is paid, which some creditors might see. As for approval rates, they've actually improved in recent years. The key is making a reasonable offer based on your actual financial situation and providing thorough documentation. Many rejections happen due to incomplete paperwork or unrealistically low offers. Working with a tax professional to prepare your OIC can significantly improve your chances of acceptance.
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Amelia Cartwright
Man, I feel your pain. I was in a nearly identical situation last year after freelancing as a web developer. I got completely blindsided by self-employment taxes and ended up owing $32K to the IRS. The stress was unbearable. What saved me was using https://taxr.ai - it analyzed my past returns and found several deductions I'd missed as a self-employed contractor. They helped me file amended returns that reduced my liability by almost 40%. The most helpful part was their guidance on setting up a proper payment plan that actually made a dent in the principal balance instead of just covering interest. Their software reviewed everything from home office deductions to retirement contribution options that lowered my taxable income. Honestly wish I'd found them sooner instead of losing sleep for months.
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Chris King
•Did you need to provide them with a bunch of personal info? I'm always paranoid about sharing my tax docs with online services.
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Rachel Clark
•How long did the amended returns take to process? The IRS is so backlogged these days, I've heard horror stories about waiting 18+ months for amended returns.
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Amelia Cartwright
•They use bank-level encryption for document uploads, and their privacy policy is pretty strict about not sharing your data. You do need to upload your previous returns for the analysis, but no more than what you'd share with any tax professional. The amended returns took about 4 months to process, which was actually faster than I expected. Their system keeps track of everything and sends you updates on the status. They also have this feature that helps prepare responses to IRS notices if you get any during the waiting period.
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Chris King
I was super hesitant to try taxr.ai at first because I'd already spent money on a local tax guy who didn't help much with my contractor tax mess. But after seeing it recommended here, I gave it a shot for my $25K tax debt from doing software development as a 1099 worker. The difference was night and day! They found legitimate business expenses I didn't know I could claim, helped me set up an S-Corp to reduce future self-employment taxes (saved thousands just from this), and got my payment plan restructured based on my actual ability to pay. The best part was not feeling judged for messing up. Their system guided me through everything step by step, and when I needed to talk to a human, they actually understood contractor tax issues better than the "professional" I had paid before.
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Zachary Hughes
I went through something similar with a $45K tax bill from self-employment. What nobody tells you is how impossible it is to even reach the IRS to discuss payment options. I spent literal DAYS on hold, often getting disconnected after waiting for hours. I finally used https://claimyr.com and it completely changed my experience. They held my place in the IRS phone queue and called me when an actual agent was on the line. You can see how it works here: https://youtu.be/_kiP6q8DX5c Once I got through to a real person at the IRS, I was able to explain my situation and get set up with a payment plan that actually worked for my budget. The agent even helped identify some penalty abatements I qualified for that reduced my overall balance by about $4,500. Getting that direct communication made all the difference.
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Mia Alvarez
•Wait, this is a real thing? How does it work? Do they just sit on hold for you?
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Carter Holmes
•This sounds too good to be true. The IRS barely answers their phones at all these days. Are you sure this isn't just another scam trying to get access to people's tax info?
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Zachary Hughes
•Yes, they basically hold your place in line! You give them the IRS number you're trying to reach, and their system stays on hold while you go about your day. When an actual IRS agent picks up, they connect the call to your phone. Saved me from spending another 3+ hours listening to the same hold music. No, it's definitely not a scam. They don't ask for any tax information or financial details - they're just a calling service. They never see your tax docs or speak to the IRS on your behalf. They simply hold your place in line and connect you when a human answers. I was skeptical too but it worked exactly as advertised.
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Carter Holmes
I have to eat my words about Claimyr. After posting that skeptical comment, I decided to try it anyway because I was desperate to talk to someone about my installment agreement. What a game-changer! After trying for TWO WEEKS to reach someone at the IRS and never getting through, Claimyr got me connected to an agent in about 47 minutes. I didn't have to sit by my phone - they just called me when an agent was on the line. The IRS agent I spoke with actually reduced my monthly payment from $700 to $450 based on my current financial situation, and explained how to document my expenses better for potential penalty abatement. All of this happened because I could finally have an actual conversation with a real person instead of dealing with automated systems. If you're struggling with back taxes, being able to actually talk to someone at the IRS makes a massive difference. Never going back to the old way of calling them.
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Sophia Long
Make sure you also look into abatement of penalties! I was able to get about $3,800 in penalties removed through First Time Penalty Abatement since I had a clean tax record before my contractor mishap. You have to specifically ask for it though - the IRS doesn't volunteer this information.
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JacksonHarris
•Thank you for mentioning this! I had no idea this existed. Do you have to have filed all your returns to qualify? And did you request this through a form or by calling?
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Sophia Long
•Yes, you need to have filed all required tax returns to qualify for First Time Penalty Abatement. The IRS also looks at your payment compliance for the three years prior to the year you're requesting relief for. I requested it by calling the IRS directly and specifically asking for "First Time Penalty Abatement." There's also Form 843 you can submit, but I found that speaking with someone directly worked better because they could verify my eligibility immediately. Just make sure to be persistent and clearly state that you're requesting FTA based on your prior good compliance history.
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Angelica Smith
Don't forget to adjust your tax withholding for this year ASAP! Set aside 25-30% of all your contractor income or make quarterly estimated payments. The worst thing you can do is fall further behind while trying to fix past issues.
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Logan Greenburg
•This is crucial advice. I learned this the hard way too. I use a separate savings account at a different bank where I immediately transfer 30% of each payment I receive. Makes it less tempting to "borrow" from my tax money when cash gets tight.
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Angelica Smith
•That's actually a really smart system! I do something similar but with an online bank that takes 2-3 days for transfers - creates just enough friction to prevent impulsive "borrowing" from the tax fund. Works wonders for staying on track with quarterly payments.
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Henry Delgado
I'm so sorry you're going through this - the stress and anxiety from tax debt is absolutely crushing, and you're definitely not alone in this situation. As someone who's been there, I want you to know that there IS a way out of this. A few practical steps that helped me: 1. **Get current first** - Like others mentioned, make sure you're not digging the hole deeper. Set up automatic transfers of 30% from every contractor payment into a separate tax account. 2. **Request penalty abatement** - If you had a clean tax history before this mess, ask for First Time Penalty Abatement. This alone could save you thousands. 3. **Consider professional help** - Sometimes the cost of a tax professional who specializes in contractor issues pays for itself through the deductions and strategies they find. 4. **Don't let this define you** - You made an honest mistake that thousands of first-time contractors make. The IRS deals with this situation constantly, and they have programs specifically designed to help people in your position. The most important thing is to take action rather than letting the anxiety paralyze you. Each step forward, no matter how small, reduces that overwhelming feeling. You've got this, and your family's financial future isn't ruined - this is a temporary setback that can absolutely be resolved.
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