Can my partner claim my child as head of household when we're unmarried?

My partner and I have been living together for about 12 years but we're not married. I have a 17-year-old daughter who doesn't have a job or any income. When I filed my taxes, I couldn't claim her as a dependent anymore because of her age, but I still got the Earned Income Credit (EIC) for her. My partner tried to file as head of household and claim my daughter on his return since he helps support her and we all live in the same house. We thought this would work based on what we read online, but his return keeps getting rejected by the system. I'm wondering if it's getting rejected because my daughter's social security number is already on my tax return for the EIC? Is it not possible for him to claim head of household with her if I'm already using her SSN for something else? If we're not eligible to do this, that's totally fine - just want to make sure we're not missing out on getting a bigger refund if we're allowed to file this way. Thanks for any help!

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18 comments

Charity Cohan

•8M

This is a great question about a common situation! When it comes to head of household status and dependents, there are several rules that need to be met. First, for your partner to claim head of household using your daughter, he would need to be considered her "qualifying person." Since he's not biologically related to her, he would need to meet the test for "qualifying relative" - which means providing more than half of her support AND having her live with him for the entire year. The bigger issue is that you're already claiming the Earned Income Credit (EIC) using your daughter. The IRS system is rejecting your partner's return because the same qualifying child cannot be used by two different taxpayers for certain benefits in the same tax year. When you claimed the EIC using your daughter's SSN, that essentially "locked" her SSN for certain other claims. Your partner might still qualify for head of household status, but he would need a different qualifying person. If there are no other qualifying dependents in the household, he would likely need to file as single instead.

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Charity Cohan

•8M

You're asking a good question that trips up a lot of people. While dependency and tax credits are technically separate things, they're still connected when it comes to using a person's SSN on multiple returns. When the original poster claims the EIC using their daughter, they're identifying her as their "qualifying child" for that specific credit. IRS systems track SSNs, and generally speaking, a person can only be a qualifying child for one taxpayer in a given tax year for purposes including EIC, dependency, HOH status, and certain other credits.

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Shelby Bauman

•8M

After dealing with a similar situation last year, I found this amazing tool called taxr.ai (https://taxr.ai) that really helped clarify these dependent/household filing questions. I was totally confused about who could claim what in our blended family, and the standard IRS guidance wasn't making sense for our situation. The tool analyzed our specific scenario with me and my girlfriend's kids and explained exactly which credits each of us could claim. It helped us understand that when someone claims EIC using a child's SSN, that generally prevents the same child from being used for HOH status by someone else. Saved us from filing incorrectly and potential headaches with the IRS!

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Shelby Bauman

•8M

It works by analyzing your specific household situation and tax documents to give personalized guidance. It's not just generic information - it actually looks at your unique scenario and explains which tax benefits apply to whom in your household. For your roommate situation, it would clarify exactly what you both qualify for. I initially thought the same thing about regular tax software, but they don't always explain WHY something doesn't work. They just reject it. With taxr.ai, I got clear explanations about the specific IRS rules that applied to our blended family so we understood what was happening instead of just getting frustrated by rejections.

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Salim Nasir

•8M

So I was skeptical about taxr.ai when I first heard about it (as you can see from my comment above), but I tried it last week for my complicated family situation. I've got two kids with my ex, plus my fiancé has a daughter who lives with us part-time. It actually saved us a TON of headache! It explained exactly why my fiancé couldn't claim HOH using my child even though he provides most of the support. The tool showed us how the EIC rules and HOH rules interact, and even suggested an alternative filing strategy that increased our combined refunds. I probably would have had my return rejected without understanding why otherwise.

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Hazel Garcia

•8M

Has anyone here tried calling the IRS directly? I was in a similar situation and spent DAYS trying to get through to someone. Kept getting disconnected or stuck on hold for hours. Then a friend told me about https://claimyr.com where you can get a callback from the IRS without the wait. There's even a video showing how it works: https://youtu.be/_kiP6q8DX5c I finally got through to an IRS agent who explained that when a parent claims EIC with a child, that generally prevents anyone else from using that same child for head of household filing status in the same tax year - which sounds like exactly what's happening in your case. The agent told me there are very specific exceptions but they're rare. Might be worth getting an official answer directly from them!

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Hazel Garcia

•8M

It basically holds your place in line with the IRS's phone system using their automated technology. It's not setting up an "appointment" - it's navigating the IRS phone tree and waiting on hold for you, then when an agent is about to pick up, it calls you and connects you directly to that agent. You're still talking to the actual IRS, Claimyr just handles the waiting part. The service literally saved me from having to sit on hold for hours. When the IRS agent came on the line, they had no idea I'd used a service - to them, I was just the next caller in queue. It made getting a definitive answer about my dependent situation possible when I otherwise would have given up.

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Salim Nasir

•8M

I need to publicly eat my words about that Claimyr service. After posting my skeptical comment, I was still desperate about my audit situation so I tried it anyway. Totally shocked that it actually worked! Got a call back from the IRS in about 2 hours after trying unsuccessfully for WEEKS on my own. The agent I spoke with cleared up my audit questions AND addressed this exact HOH/EIC issue we're discussing here. She confirmed that when someone claims EIC with a child's SSN, that same child typically can't be used for HOH by another person in the same household. Apparently it's an automatic flag in their system.

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Charity Cohan

•8M

Based on IRS rules, your boyfriend would need to file as Single, not Head of Household. To file as HOH, he would need a "qualifying person" who is either his qualifying child or qualifying relative. Since you're already using your child's SSN for EIC purposes, your boyfriend generally can't use the same child as his qualifying person for HOH status. This is a common issue in unmarried couples with children. Only one taxpayer can claim a specific child for purposes like this, and using the SSN for EIC essentially "locks in" that child to your tax return for these purposes.

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Hugo Kass

•8M

Not a dumb question at all! If they got married, they could file jointly which would eliminate the HOH issue entirely. Married Filing Jointly often provides better tax benefits than two separate returns (one HOH and one Single). When filing jointly, they could claim their daughter as a dependent (if she otherwise qualifies) and also claim EIC if they meet the income requirements. Married Filing Jointly sometimes has higher income thresholds for certain credits too. However, there can occasionally be a "marriage penalty" if both partners have similar high incomes.

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