Can I claim reduced ex-spouse Social Security benefits at 60 due to disability or must wait until 62?

Unfortunately, you'll need to wait until age 62 to claim ex-spousal benefits. The disability exception for early filing at age 60 only applies to survivor benefits (widows/widowers), not to spousal or ex-spousal benefits. Even with a disability, the earliest you can claim ex-spousal benefits is 62. Regarding your second question: Since you're turning 60 in 2025, you were born in 1965. This means you were born after January 2, 1954, so you CANNOT file for just ex-spousal benefits while letting your own grow. When you file, you'll be deemed to be filing for both benefits simultaneously, and you'll receive essentially the higher of the two amounts.

my sister tried to do somthing similar and she found out the hard way that if u were born after 1954 u CANT do the file for one benefit and let the other grow thing anymore. they changed the rules :( when u file ur filing for EVERYTHING. my suggestion is wait til ur FRA if possible, u get the maximum that way

The SSA rules can be SO confusing!!! I spent HOURS on the phone with them last year trying to figure out something similar. Let me tell you what I learned - you definitely can't get spousal at 60 even with disability. The 60 age only works for widow benefits which you don't qualify for since your ex is still alive. And yes, they'll make you take both benefits at once - they call it "deemed filing" and it's SUPER annoying!! The only disability exception would be if you qualified for actual SSDI, which you said you don't. You should log into your my Social Security account and look at your estimated benefits. That will tell you what YOUR benefit would be at 62, FRA, and 70. Then compare that to 50% of your ex's benefit (which will be reduced if you take it at 62).

I've helped several family members navigate this exact situation. The previous responses are correct - you cannot file for ex-spousal benefits at age 60 based on disability unless you qualify for SSDI. The age 60 exception only applies to survivor benefits. Here's what you should do: 1. Create or login to your my Social Security account at ssa.gov to see your estimated retirement benefit 2. Ask your ex-spouse what his SSDI benefit amount is (if you're on speaking terms) or estimate it 3. Calculate what 50% of his benefit would be 4. Compare that to your own benefit at various ages If your own benefit at FRA will be higher than 50% of his, then waiting until your FRA to file might make financial sense, health considerations aside. If 50% of his benefit is higher than what your own would be at 62, filing at 62 might be your best option. Just remember - if you file at 62, your ex-spousal benefit will be reduced to about 32.5% of his benefit amount rather than the full 50%.

Can you actually get SSDI? Have you applied and been denied? Because if you're truly disabled and can't work, you should be focusing on qualifying for SSDI first, which would change everything about your situation. Then you could potentially file at 60.

To answer your third question - if your birthday is in July, your benefits would start in August (Social Security pays a month behind). So you'd want to apply in April for benefits to start in August of the year you turn 62. The application processing takes about 3 months on average. And no, your ex will NOT be notified when you apply for benefits on his record. The SSA keeps that information confidential. They will verify your marriage details but don't contact him.

i waited till my FRA to collect and got a NASTY surprise when they told me how little id get! shoulda just taken it at 62 honestly. the extra amount wasnt worth waiting 5 years for in my case. just my 2 cents

Have you tried calling SSA directly to ask about this? When I had questions about my spousal benefits last year, I spent literally WEEKS trying to get through on their 800 number. Kept getting disconnected or waiting on hold for hours. I eventually found this service called Claimyr that helped me get through to an agent in about 20 minutes. They basically call SSA for you and then connect you when an agent answers. Saved me so much frustration! You can see how it works in their video demo: https://youtu.be/Z-BRbJw3puU or check out claimyr.com. Definitely worth it for complex questions like yours that the website doesn't clearly address.

One more important point - you mentioned having a permanent disability but not qualifying for SSDI. If your disability meets SSA's criteria but you were denied because of insufficient recent work credits (which happens when people develop disabilities after being out of the workforce), you might want to explore SSI (Supplemental Security Income). It's needs-based rather than work-based, and while the benefit is typically lower than SSDI, it could provide some income before you turn 62. SSI has strict asset and income limits, but it's worth investigating if your resources are limited while waiting to reach 62.