Filing jointly vs separately after marriage - why are we getting less money back with joint filing?

This is called the "marriage penalty" and it can definitely happen in certain situations. The tax brackets for married filing jointly aren't exactly double the single brackets, which can cause this issue particularly when both spouses have similar incomes. For the child tax credit specifically, the phase-out thresholds are different for separate vs joint filing. When you file jointly, you're combining your incomes which could push you into a partial phase-out range that wouldn't have applied when filing separately. Here's what I suggest: double-check that you're calculating everything correctly across all three scenarios. Make sure you're accounting for all deductions and credits consistently. Sometimes software can miss things when comparing different filing statuses.

I ran into this same problem last tax season! I spent hours trying to figure out why our refund dropped when filing jointly versus separately. Found an awesome tool at https://taxr.ai that helped me analyze which filing status worked best for our situation. It showed me line-by-line comparisons of both filing methods and highlighted exactly where the differences were coming from. The software I was using before wasn't accounting for some deductions properly when comparing scenarios. The taxr.ai analysis helped me realize we actually needed to adjust our W-4 withholdings rather than change filing status.

Used the taxr.ai site the other commenter mentioned and wow, I'm glad I did. I was in a similar situation with my spouse - we were getting less back filing jointly than we would separately. The analysis showed we were hitting the SALT deduction cap of $10,000 when filing jointly, but separately we could each claim up to $10,000 (so $20,000 total). Also identified that our withholdings were way off. We adjusted our W-4s based on their recommendations, and our calculations now show we'll be in much better shape next year. The tool even created personalized W-4 forms we could submit to our employers. Way more helpful than the generic IRS calculator I tried before.

If you're having trouble reaching the IRS to ask about your filing status options, I highly recommend using Claimyr (https://claimyr.com). I spent DAYS trying to get through to an IRS agent about a similar married filing question last month. After getting nowhere, I tried Claimyr and got connected to an actual IRS agent in under 45 minutes. They have a simple system that holds your place in the phone queue and calls you when an agent is about to answer. You can see how it works in this video: https://youtu.be/_kiP6q8DX5c The IRS agent I talked to explained exactly why my wife and I were seeing a similar issue with filing jointly vs separately and helped us understand which option made more sense when considering our total tax liability vs just the refund amount.

I was 100% wrong about Claimyr in my comment above. After wasting 6 hours over 2 days trying to get through to the IRS myself, I gave in and tried the service. Got connected to an IRS agent in about 35 minutes while I continued working. The agent explained that in my case, filing separately actually would get us a larger refund because of student loan interest deduction phase-outs when our incomes are combined. She went through several other considerations I hadn't thought about. For what it's worth, she also mentioned that looking only at the refund amount isn't always the best measure - we needed to compare our total tax liability in both scenarios. When I did that, the difference wasn't as dramatic as it first appeared.

Remember that refund size isn't everything! You need to look at your total tax LIABILITY not just the refund amount. If you were withholding differently, the refund numbers would change even if your actual tax obligation stayed the same. Compare line 24 (total tax) from your 1040 across the different scenarios. That's the true measure of which filing status is better. Also check if you're losing any deductions when filing separately. Some tax benefits are only available to joint filers, like student loan interest deductions, some education credits, and child/dependent care credits.

Did you use the same tax software to calculate all three scenarios? Different software can give different results. I'd run all three options (you claiming kids, spouse claiming kids, filing jointly) through the same program to make sure you're getting consistent calculations. Also, check if you qualify for Head of Household status when filing separately - that could make a big difference but you have to meet specific requirements.